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That note stayed w/ me....probably still have it packed away...Sometimes we take a lot of crap from others, peers if you will. You just hold your head up...Believe me, there is always someone looking, and learning from you. It may be the least expected person at times...But, you doing what you are supposed to do...even under fire from losers at work....Does get noticed. Keep on doing you job, it will eventually pay off. I went on to become very good friends w/ this tough old broad...I adored her, she taught me so much professionally...I will never forget that couple of years and how much I grew personally as well as professionally. Hang in there.
Side note...one particularly snotty person, who made fun of my "dust bowl okie heritage" still ducks when I see her around town. And, I'm as nice as I can possibly be to her face...But, I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw her.
I applaud you for continuing on your own path and ignoring those "peers"...I'm using that word loosely because I don't believe they ever were your peers. Somehow I think they knew it too, hence the snarkiness.
Aww come on, pitch her...make all of us (including yourself) smile.
There was a department in a company that I used to work at that had problems like the ones mentioned with the cliques and the cattiness. There was one girl who did not participate in that nonsense. She was very serious, though I didn't find her to be unfriendly. The others in that department didn't like her and treated her poorly. Anyway, when an entry-level management position opened up, guess who got the job?
The clique was appalled. They had all been there longer! This wasn't fair! blah blah blah.
At my place of employment there were a few cliques; however, the bullying came from many of the managers, not the employees. And if you were one of the managers' 'pets', you received praise, recognition and highest wage increases (even if the 'pet' was a lazy slacker). That type of environment destroyed employee morale more than anything else.
And since top mgmt either buried their head in the sand, or were party to the bullying, there was really no one to go to at the company to end it.
At my place of employment there were a few cliques; however, the bullying came from many of the managers, not the employees. And if you were one of the managers' 'pets', you received praise, recognition and highest wage increases (even if the 'pet' was a lazy slacker). That type of environment destroyed employee morale more than anything else.
And since top mgmt either buried their head in the sand, or were party to the bullying, there was really no one to go to at the company to end it.
There are companies with sick cultures out there. They usually end up imploding eventually.
I used to get targeted when I was working w/ a group of other professionals. This was in disaster recovery work. And, these were so called "helping professionals" etc. Believe me, it doesn't matter what field, or profession...There are always at least one or two a-holes in every walk of life.
I worked hard, and our supervisor gave me the toughest cases...a few of the others at our weekly meetings were obviously a bit put off by this...They would be snarky at me, and even mimic things I'd shared about my background when we were asked as a group to do so a few times. Sort of that "joining" period all leaders think is relevant...Hi, my name is...I'm from....bla, bla. A couple of those professionals enjoyed mimicking me...even during meetings...
Our supervisor came to my office...She was the supervisor for all of us...Several different agencies, someone representing each agency was involved in this weekly staffing.....Anyway...I guess She'd observed some of the catty comments...which I essentially tired to just ignore....but...I did keep track...like the other poster said...listen, learn....utilize this information. ...Anyway, my supervisor came to my office....I wasn't there, but she left me a note...which wasn't her style....she wasn't all mushy and touchy feely type...In fact she had been the person all the placement students were terrified of because she had a rep for being so tough. So, this note says...I know that I give you the most difficult cases, and I know you sometimes get guff for it...But, I want you to know that I give these cases to you, because I know you will do everything to get them the help they need.
That note stayed w/ me....probably still have it packed away...Sometimes we take a lot of crap from others, peers if you will. You just hold your head up...Believe me, there is always someone looking, and learning from you. It may be the least expected person at times...But, you doing what you are supposed to do...even under fire from losers at work....Does get noticed. Keep on doing you job, it will eventually pay off. I went on to become very good friends w/ this tough old broad...I adored her, she taught me so much professionally...I will never forget that couple of years and how much I grew personally as well as professionally. Hang in there.
Side note...one particularly snotty person, who made fun of my "dust bowl okie heritage" still ducks when I see her around town. And, I'm as nice as I can possibly be to her face...But, I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw her.
Thanks for this story. I do get noticed by my superiors for working hard, and at the end of the day that's what counts. Not the chatter of my "peers".
I lost a great job because of this behavior. There was a group of three employees who were constantly outside smoking and gossiping. This was a veterinary office and one of the group was a vet. The other two worked upstairs as receptionist or in the exam rooms while I worked downstairs in the ward with the animals.
Because they were outside half the night I couldn't get anything done...just something simple like placing a catheter took forty-five minutes instead of five because I'd have to wait around for someone to hold the animal. Plus I had to keep running upstairs to answer phones/greet clients/etc. So I was always running behind and it looked like I was the one being lazy.
I tried talking to the office manager and was told she couldn't stop them from smoking (no, but she could stop them from doing it every half hour...she just didn't want to confront them.) I tried talking to them individually. It helped for about one day.
Finally it got to the point where I was honestly enraged. I've never actually wanted to hit another person before, but I could have cheerfully murdered them. One night the vet involved wouldn't stop bugging me and asking me what was wrong. I ended up bursting into tears...not because I was upset, but because I was so flipping ANGRY. I quit a few weeks later. To rub it all in, the day I quit the vet told me he didn't understand why we couldn't 'just talk about it.' I may have screamed in his face at that point.
I do miss that job, but I don't miss feeling so angry all the time.
Can anyone offer advice on how to cope with cliques at work? It's becoming an increasing problem in the company department that I work with.
Small groups of people (usually with something in common like gender, race, economic background) will become "BFFs" and bond over spreading rumors and ridicule about those who are on the edge of the crowd. When it comes to doing actual work, they support and help each other and no one else, often leaving the harder and longer tasks to others. They only stoop so low to talk to others when they're in need of something. Things that happened at parties, happy hours, etc. outside of work are often discussed with "outsiders" but rarely are invitations extended ("this awesome thing happened at so-and-so's place, but you're pretty much the only person here who wasn't invited!" but not in so many words). God forbid you confront one of them about something—their one-sided complaints about you will not only be spread far and wide, but agreed with.
I have no desire to enter these exclusive group of snobs who really have nothing to be snobby about. But it makes things at the office difficult. What's one to do when you like your job, like the company itself, but are fed up with the high-schoolish behavior of your coworkers?
LOL. i quit a job like that last year. i am a quiet and shy person so i am an easy target for the crazy, serial killer jokes. I was the best of what i did. I handled 11 accounts while others handled 5 or 6. The manager was a gossip queen (although he was a male with 2 kids). Then they were 2 ladies that were with the company for over 15 years (lifers). a super religious lady who spent more time on the phone with her church then working. IMO, to survive in a corporate environment you have to adapt and create a different persona. If you don't like being a fake then i suggest moving to a different work environment. Maybe a small to mid-size office.
Now, I work at a small office. Cliques are usually small in small companies. I enjoy the people i work with but i still play the lottery so i can be done with working entirely.
I used to get targeted when I was working w/ a group of other professionals. This was in disaster recovery work. And, these were so called "helping professionals" etc. Believe me, it doesn't matter what field, or profession...There are always at least one or two a-holes in every walk of life.
I worked hard, and our supervisor gave me the toughest cases...a few of the others at our weekly meetings were obviously a bit put off by this...They would be snarky at me, and even mimic things I'd shared about my background when we were asked as a group to do so a few times. Sort of that "joining" period all leaders think is relevant...Hi, my name is...I'm from....bla, bla. A couple of those professionals enjoyed mimicking me...even during meetings...
Our supervisor came to my office...She was the supervisor for all of us...Several different agencies, someone representing each agency was involved in this weekly staffing.....Anyway...I guess She'd observed some of the catty comments...which I essentially tired to just ignore....but...I did keep track...like the other poster said...listen, learn....utilize this information. ...Anyway, my supervisor came to my office....I wasn't there, but she left me a note...which wasn't her style....she wasn't all mushy and touchy feely type...In fact she had been the person all the placement students were terrified of because she had a rep for being so tough. So, this note says...I know that I give you the most difficult cases, and I know you sometimes get guff for it...But, I want you to know that I give these cases to you, because I know you will do everything to get them the help they need.
That note stayed w/ me....probably still have it packed away...Sometimes we take a lot of crap from others, peers if you will. You just hold your head up...Believe me, there is always someone looking, and learning from you. It may be the least expected person at times...But, you doing what you are supposed to do...even under fire from losers at work....Does get noticed. Keep on doing you job, it will eventually pay off. I went on to become very good friends w/ this tough old broad...I adored her, she taught me so much professionally...I will never forget that couple of years and how much I grew personally as well as professionally. Hang in there.
Side note...one particularly snotty person, who made fun of my "dust bowl okie heritage" still ducks when I see her around town. And, I'm as nice as I can possibly be to her face...But, I wouldn't trust her as far as I could throw her.
Your story brings a smile to my face. Thank you for sharing it. Did she end up promoting you?
Because they were outside half the night I couldn't get anything done...just something simple like placing a catheter took forty-five minutes instead of five because I'd have to wait around for someone to hold the animal. Plus I had to keep running upstairs to answer phones/greet clients/etc. So I was always running behind and it looked like I was the one being lazy.
I tried talking to the office manager and was told she couldn't stop them from smoking (no, but she could stop them from doing it every half hour...she just didn't want to confront them.) I tried talking to them individually. It helped for about one day.
Finally it got to the point where I was honestly enraged. I've never actually wanted to hit another person before, but I could have cheerfully murdered them. One night the vet involved wouldn't stop bugging me and asking me what was wrong. I ended up bursting into tears...not because I was upset, but because I was so flipping ANGRY. I quit a few weeks later. To rub it all in, the day I quit the vet told me he didn't understand why we couldn't 'just talk about it.' I may have screamed in his face at that point.
I do miss that job, but I don't miss feeling so angry all the time.
I do feel I get where you are coming from!
I find it amazing when a culture of misbehavior, the networking of the lazy [in this case, over incessant smoke breaks], and the blatant conflict of work ethics - and one's frustration over it - makes it look like you're the one upsetting the happy little dysfunctional apple cart!??!
My mother is having this problem right now at work and I fear for her job, because she is walking 10 steps behind me in the same scenario. I walked out on this situation not 7 months ago and although I had the potential to love the job (the field), I also do not miss the medical issues brought on by fantasizing about strangling the life out of someone on a daily basis.
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