Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Work and Employment
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 05-25-2013, 12:24 AM
 
131 posts, read 323,008 times
Reputation: 186

Advertisements

Quote:
Originally Posted by fibonacci View Post
Did the dirty deed and basically told the guy he stinks to high heaven to his face in a kind manner. Screw passive aggressive crap.
Ok..what happened? Did he take it kindly..little embarassed?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 05-25-2013, 04:30 AM
 
Location: Right were I should be!
1,081 posts, read 1,644,656 times
Reputation: 1126
I was the lucky one who had to sit someone down and explain that while we had individual cubicles, her breath was overly offensive and more than a few coworkers had come to me with the issue. I just said that while we have some people who are pregnant and some with highly sensitive senses of smell, we need to nip this issue in the bud. She then said it was because of her dentures and that she smokes. I explained it doesn't matter why, it just needs to be addressed immediately and she can feel free to keep mouthwash in the bathroom cabinets.

This fixed things for a couple weeks, but then had to be addressed again. Unfortunately, she was not the only one I have had to speak with about this issue. Whoever made the statement about them getting used to their own stink is on to something. They're just immune to it until it's pointed out. It can be done tactfully but you can't beat around the bush.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-26-2013, 12:36 AM
 
2,845 posts, read 6,001,331 times
Reputation: 3749
I am also curious how it went?

And enough with the "foreigner" stereotype, I've worked jobs with smelly people and they were NOT foreigners... In fact, every single one was caucasian. Cleanliness is very important in many cultures, not just American cultures. I've grown up here my whole life and even when I have gone overseas to visit my extended Middle Eastern family I have not noticed they smell bad! It just varies from person to person...
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-28-2013, 08:41 AM
 
Location: North Texas
24,561 posts, read 40,186,320 times
Reputation: 28548
Quote:
Originally Posted by beera View Post
I am also curious how it went?

And enough with the "foreigner" stereotype, I've worked jobs with smelly people and they were NOT foreigners... In fact, every single one was caucasian. Cleanliness is very important in many cultures, not just American cultures. I've grown up here my whole life and even when I have gone overseas to visit my extended Middle Eastern family I have not noticed they smell bad! It just varies from person to person...
Just because a person is clean doesn't mean they won't smell.

In France I knew African immigrants who were clean clean clean...their flats were immaculate and their clothes were always crisp and freshly laundered. They showered at least once a day, sometimes twice. With soap. Some lived in the same building I did and when I was checking the post or doing laundry near them, my eyes would literally water. Others I'd see daily on public transportation and would avoid standing next to them on the train because once they lifted an arm to grab a pole to support themselves....well...you can see where this is going.

The difference between them and me is that they did not use deodorant. It was not widely used in their home country and the women (wrongly) thought that deodorant caused breast cancer. I managed to persuade the men to start using deodorant very easily, but it took a lot of arm twisting to get the women on board. One would only wear a deodorant that she made herself once I gave her a recipe for a natural homemade deodorant. It wasn't as effective as commerical products but it was a vast improvement.

These people were not dirty, they did not lack hygiene, they were not diseased. They just came from a country where people don't wear deodorant. Hell even some French women don't wear it, again because they assume it causes breast cancer. They spray their pits with perfume and shower twice a day, once in the morning and again in the afternoon. They are not dirty.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-28-2013, 10:02 AM
 
Location: NYC
16,061 posts, read 26,692,634 times
Reputation: 24848
Perhaps he just doesn't care.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-28-2013, 10:16 AM
 
Location: Southern California
12,704 posts, read 14,872,891 times
Reputation: 15234
Quote:
Originally Posted by fibonacci View Post
Did the dirty deed and basically told the guy he stinks to high heaven to his face in a kind manner. Screw passive aggressive crap.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loops778 View Post
Ok..what happened? Did he take it kindly..little embarassed?
Uh & WHAT did he say & do from then on? I don't know why you're leaving out the main issue of this thread you started.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-28-2013, 10:19 AM
 
Location: The Valley of the Sun
1,479 posts, read 2,713,649 times
Reputation: 1534
Quote:
Originally Posted by Loops778 View Post
send an anonymous email.
This. Or politely tell him the extent of the problem.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-29-2013, 11:13 AM
 
254 posts, read 596,573 times
Reputation: 172
Quote:
Originally Posted by fibonacci View Post
Has anyone had to deal with this before? I like the guy, he's very intelligent, and good to get along with, but for some reason he has horrible hygiene. Sometimes it seems like he hasn't showered for almost a week--dandruff is blatant and he can easily be smelled from almost 20 feet away. Many times his clothes are also disgustingly filthy, like they haven't been washed for 3 weeks. Unfortunately, my desk is right next to this person so I have to constantly smell his musk all day long. Yesterday, another co-worker was at the gym the same time he was and commented at how revolting he was smelling at the gym and how there was a radius of people that would not work out next to him at the gym because of the smell. This person is also foreign, so sometimes I understand that in foreign cultures deodorant and showering may not always be a daily thing. How would you politely tell this person to basically "clean up". He's a very bright individual, but little does he realize, that he's being ostracized behind his back by everyone else and damaging his career simply because of hygiene. First impressions are everything; one can give a wonderful speech and presentation, but if you stink to high heaven, that's all everyone is going to remember and you could ruin a potential employment opportunity for a reason that's easily fixable. What should I do?
Has this guy always been this way? If you don't know, as someone who has been there a long time. Be discreet.
This person may be homeless for some reason or another. How well do you know this guy? Was he married? Is he now divorced? Does he have gambling debts? This is a delicate thing. Going to HR may not be a good idea, as he could lose his job over this kind of thing. He may have a temporary residence with a friend.
You can talk with him in private and ask him how things are going. He may not be willing to talk to you about it at first. Tell him you are concerned. Tell him that if he has problems getting a shower (you mentioned the gym - he could be in there to take a shower) and getting his clothes clean, offer him some money to get his clothes cleaned at a laundry mat and such. Tell him that if he values his job and paycheck he will consider your offer. Do this and don't tell anyone else. Nobody likes gossip. If you help him, it will make you feel good knowing you're doing the right thing. Good luck.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-29-2013, 11:17 AM
 
254 posts, read 596,573 times
Reputation: 172
Quote:
Originally Posted by BigDGeek View Post
You can have good hygiene and still stink to high heaven.

Some cultures don't wear deodorant. There are various reasons why...it's expensive, they consider it a luxury, they're used to people stinking like people (it's normal to stink), etc. In those cultures, not wearing deodorant and having BO is not a big deal because everybody does it. They may bathe every day, but you'll start to stink pretty fast if you're not wearing deodorant...particularly if your clothes have that baked-in BO smell and haven't been washed in a while. People in developing countries don't wear clothes once then wash them. That's something rich Westerners do.

It doesn't mean they're dirty. It just means that they have a normal human animal smell that we're not used to smelling because we scrub and perfume everything to an extreme.

A manager should take this person aside gently and explain to them that in this culture, we find that odor unpleasant and offensive. That's really all it should take.
This person also mentioned filthy clothes. I can understand if the person wasn't wearing deodorant, but the dirty clothes indicate something else.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 05-29-2013, 12:52 PM
 
Location: North Texas
24,561 posts, read 40,186,320 times
Reputation: 28548
Quote:
Originally Posted by JennStar View Post
This person also mentioned filthy clothes. I can understand if the person wasn't wearing deodorant, but the dirty clothes indicate something else.
I realize that, I'm just speaking in general terms. BO doesn't always mean you're a filthy bugger.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Work and Employment
Similar Threads

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:25 PM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top