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This is a strange pattern of yours, OP. Add to that that you still obsess over this firing more than 10 years ago (and have given a number of conflicting reasons for it) and I have to wonder if you might benefit from therapy and/or medication.[/quote]
I'm glad you caught this because I thought I was crazy.
This is a strange pattern of yours, OP. Add to that that you still obsess over this firing more than 10 years ago (and have given a number of conflicting reasons for it) and I have to wonder if you might benefit from therapy and/or medication.
I'm glad you caught this because I thought I was crazy.[/quote]
I have been fired a number of times in my career. That firing was years ago, the latest was just recently and that was used to blackball me out of the field!
I have been fired a number of times in my career. That firing was years ago, the latest was just recently and that was used to blackball me out of the field!
I guess I just don't get why you are obsessing over it.
Or do you not like being retired? My dad hated being retired. He used to say the only reason he got out of bed i the moning was to get breakfast.
Here I am retired with a nice balance in my 401k and collecting Social Security and doing just fine financially.
So I am walking down a path at a local park and I look up and coming down the path right at me is one of the nastiest human beings I have ever experienced in my life. The man who fired me, then successfully fought my unemployment claim using lies, and made sure that that anyone at that employer would not say anything good about me so I could land on my feet and start over. Human Resources told all potential employers I was not eligible for rehire and was fired. (Yes, legally they can say that because it was true!)
At my termination, this guy was particularly harsh and mean. The official reason I was fired was I could not do the job at their expected standards. I worked 12 hours day and worked incredibly hard and did my best, but it was not good enough for them. We had an incredibly intense relationship for a number of years and talked multiple times a day.
It took me a year to get back into my career field because potential employees would be suspicious of anyone who had been fired from a job they held for five years. At reference check time, most potential employers insisted that they had to talk to my manager of five years before I would be considered. Many called him and he would not speak of me, if they got him on the phone, or would not return their phone messages.
Anyway, back to the park and September 2013. I always told myself that if I got back on my feet and ran into this terrible man again I would tell him off and make a scene. (I spent so many nights after my firing trying to think of ways I could have been a better employee and not be fired)
I had not seen him since, for over ten years, until last weekend. He looked so old, mean and ugly and he was with his wife and I was with my wife. Our eyes met and he looked at me funny and we kept walking and no words were spoken.
Would you have said something to him if it were you in my shoes?
You absolutely did the right thing. No point in bringing that up again, as it would just lead to nowhere good. Your life turned out okay in the end, so why risk a confrontation that could lead to a place only God knows. I totally understand the urge to have the last word, but sometimes it's better to leave well enough alone. If you allow him to undo your nice walk in the park, then in a way, he 'wins'. You've won by simply moving forward and leaving him to be bitter and rotten with time.
I have been fired a number of times in my career. That firing was years ago, the latest was just recently and that was used to blackball me out of the field!
OK so the pattern you have is to get fired in extremely aggressive ways and your bosses are so angry with you that they want to make sure you are never hired again. But I am sure that's everyone else's fault and you are the blameless angel.
In every post you are complaining about how other people treat you poorly or how screwed up they are. Ever wonder if the reason might rest closer to home? Like, that you are delusional?
OP, I would have done exactly what you did...look at him, then keep on walking without saying anything. Actually, I would have wished I had on some sunglasses, then our eyes wouldn't have to look at each other!
Boy, I just wish I could one day run into a few people who treated me like dirt once I became successful. Just them seeing my fancy car, & my well put together appearance, & the expression on their faces would be enough satisfaction for me!
OK so the pattern you have is to get fired in extremely aggressive ways and your bosses are so angry with you that they want to make sure you are never hired again. But I am sure that's everyone else's fault and you are the blameless angel.
In every post you are complaining about how other people treat you poorly or how screwed up they are. Ever wonder if the reason might rest closer to home? Like, that you are delusional?
Yes, I must be a terrible person for being fired three times in a life of over 45 years of working!
Here I am retired with a nice balance in my 401k and collecting Social Security and doing just fine financially.
So I am walking down a path at a local park and I look up and coming down the path right at me is one of the nastiest human beings I have ever experienced in my life. The man who fired me, then successfully fought my unemployment claim using lies, and made sure that that anyone at that employer would not say anything good about me so I could land on my feet and start over. Human Resources told all potential employers I was not eligible for rehire and was fired. (Yes, legally they can say that because it was true!)
At my termination, this guy was particularly harsh and mean. The official reason I was fired was I could not do the job at their expected standards. I worked 12 hours day and worked incredibly hard and did my best, but it was not good enough for them. We had an incredibly intense relationship for a number of years and talked multiple times a day.
It took me a year to get back into my career field because potential employees would be suspicious of anyone who had been fired from a job they held for five years. At reference check time, most potential employers insisted that they had to talk to my manager of five years before I would be considered. Many called him and he would not speak of me, if they got him on the phone, or would not return their phone messages.
Anyway, back to the park and September 2013. I always told myself that if I got back on my feet and ran into this terrible man again I would tell him off and make a scene. (I spent so many nights after my firing trying to think of ways I could have been a better employee and not be fired)
I had not seen him since, for over ten years, until last weekend. He looked so old, mean and ugly and he was with his wife and I was with my wife. Our eyes met and he looked at me funny and we kept walking and no words were spoken.
Would you have said something to him if it were you in my shoes?
You are an amazing writer. I enjoyed reading your post
As far as your experience goes, im the same way. I always think of things to say after the fact or I chicken out.
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