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Old 04-22-2014, 10:59 AM
 
Location: NJ
395 posts, read 468,584 times
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So, I tend to have a real issue with being jealous on what other people in the office are paid and/or people I am familiar with that get paid. One part of me feels that I should be thankful for having a job, but on the other hand, become extremely jealous and downright upset when I hear that someone got promoted that isn't me, or make much more than me. Is there anyway to even remotely overcome this issue?
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Old 04-22-2014, 11:11 AM
MJ7
 
6,221 posts, read 8,643,318 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cm5878 View Post
So, I tend to have a real issue with being jealous on what other people in the office are paid and/or people I am familiar with that get paid. One part of me feels that I should be thankful for having a job, but on the other hand, become extremely jealous and downright upset when I hear that someone got promoted that isn't me, or make much more than me. Is there anyway to even remotely overcome this issue?
1. Work hard and get a promotion

2. Jump ship to another company willing to pay you more money

3. Stop being jealous and live your life and be content with where you are and where you are going. Produce an IDP (individual development plan) and postmark goals on there. You can also have discussions with your boss about future potential within the company and what the likely hood of a pay raise would be. These things should be discussed during your interview though.
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Old 04-22-2014, 11:28 AM
 
9,778 posts, read 16,990,740 times
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You need to get over your personal hang-up before it has a negative impact on your work. I got promoted over another guy who thought he was a shoe-in for the position. He then acted like a child when he didn't get it, which affirmed in the boss' mind that he made the right choice by promoting me and not the other person. Sure, it is natural to be a little upset and disappointed, but it sounds like you go way past that. Have a meeting with your boss to se what you can do to improve your chances of being promoted. Just because you want to be promoted doesn't mean that you should be promoted or are seen as capable of doing the job in question.
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Old 04-22-2014, 11:31 AM
 
424 posts, read 497,467 times
Reputation: 277
You can channel it into being ambitious about doing and being the best. There's nothing wrong with that either - as long as you're not a prick about it.
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Old 04-22-2014, 11:49 AM
 
3,154 posts, read 3,063,502 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cm5878 View Post
So, I tend to have a real issue with being jealous on what other people in the office are paid and/or people I am familiar with that get paid. One part of me feels that I should be thankful for having a job, but on the other hand, become extremely jealous and downright upset when I hear that someone got promoted that isn't me, or make much more than me. Is there anyway to even remotely overcome this issue?
Probably not. It's hard to work side by side with someone and know you are working just as hard, and yet also know that you are struggling financially and they are not. I am actually in a situation where some people I work with can make a nice living on what they make, but I make barely enough for grocery money. It's not really an injustice; more luck of the draw in terms of when people got hired. It was worse at previous jobs, where salary decisions were based mostly on gender, or in public school, where the old timers were making 100K sitting on their butts, while the newer teachers worked 12 hour days and had to have roommates and still could barely pay bills.
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Old 04-22-2014, 12:02 PM
 
7,385 posts, read 11,557,251 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cm5878 View Post
So, I tend to have a real issue with being jealous on what other people in the office are paid and/or people I am familiar with that get paid. One part of me feels that I should be thankful for having a job, but on the other hand, become extremely jealous and downright upset when I hear that someone got promoted that isn't me, or make much more than me. Is there anyway to even remotely overcome this issue?
It will never end.

Elementary school teachers in rich neighborhoods in NJ make 110K a year while a few towns over a similar teacher may be making 55K.

Cops make 100K a year after like 5 years in some districts and in other make probably 50K.

Workers for City Transit sometimes make 150K for being in maintenance positions while someone who performs similar duties for a shop might make $15/hr.

There will always be people who make much more than they deserve for what they do, and a lot of them proudly post here.

I always say you should make mid-career what the median salary is for your job title on Glassoor/Payscale/BLS, though there is some variation. Take the average of the 3. If you are within 10K or so +/-, you are right there.

If you make a lot less, you are underpaid. If you are right there, and don't like what you make, pick a new career.
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Old 04-22-2014, 03:04 PM
 
Location: East of Seattle since 1992, originally from SF Bay Area
29,806 posts, read 54,486,657 times
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I remember when I applied for a promotion to another office at the same company years ago. My co-workers including management was so confident that I would get the job, they had ordered a going away cake. The manager of that office selected someone from the outside, the reason at the time being that I was only 26 and would be supervising people in their 50s so they went with someone older. While I was disappointed, and also somewhat embarrassed, I went on with life and work and did not let it get to me. It was probably 6 months later when there was a even higher promotional opportunity and I got that, so it worked out for the best in the end. Pay and promotions are not cut and dried, there is a lot of personal opinion going into it. When people know each others salaries but not the reasons for it and the history, it leads to resentment and jealousy. Better to just worry about yourself.
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Old 04-22-2014, 03:18 PM
 
2,082 posts, read 1,858,228 times
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Just remember your day will come. Never let jealousy get in the way of doing your job.
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Old 04-22-2014, 03:23 PM
 
821 posts, read 921,310 times
Reputation: 1283
Or you can simply let go of the new "be jealous of your neighbor" and "it's every man out for himself" crap go or not define yourself by your income or occupation. Tough to do in this day and age, but it's possible.
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Old 04-22-2014, 06:33 PM
 
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
12,597 posts, read 15,062,766 times
Reputation: 12144
Don't discuss salary!
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