Jealous of siblings' career success? (debt, alternative, employer, work)
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Dude, like seriously?
you're crying cuz u make $75k/year. Get over yourself!
I know being sexually attractive in the gay community is like priority number one, but does it really matter after 30 anyway?
focus on making you happy. Great for your brother, u should be happy for him, especially as a homosexual because it's hard out there for gays in general....more difficult out there than for straights in a lot of cases, so u should be happy and proud of him that he has his life well put together..... and so do u. There's nothing wrong with renting..... nothing wrong with being single. Like, just stop focusing on that. Renting allows u freedom and so does being single. If u ever wanted to relocate, BAM u could. Your brother couldn't so easily.
Focus on the positive. It's so funny how you're all "I look younger, im fitter, im sexier, etc.." who cares! U dont sound happy and that's what really matters.
Yes, sexual attractiveness is not (and should not) be #1 priority after you hit 30 years old. But I would still like to take care of myself health wise, beauty wise and look and feel the best I can. I accept the fact of life that my 20's are behind me and I ain't getting any sexier going forward. Therefore, I don't need to live in a gay mecca or anything like that. It's not #1 priority.
My #1 priority is enhancing my quality of live, living in an area that I actually want to settle down in, staying healthy and fit, and being more committed to a job. It would also be nice to own a small home, for privacy reasons. Of course, I would continue meeting and dating other guys in the meantime. I hope those are reasonable priorities for someone entering their 30's.
As for the career dilemma comparing myself to my little brother...I suppose the fact that he's MANAGER and only making $5K more than me is really not that great. Maybe it's better to be a staff person making $75K instead of a manager making $80K. Besides, with my annual bonus of $15K, I rake in a total of $90K. My bonuses are 20%. His are only 12%, which brings him right up to $90K. So looking at it that way, we are on par to the tee!
I have always been proud of my sister when she does something better than I have. She is now an E-9 in the Navy and I could not be more proud of her. I could care less how much I make in comparison.
As for the career dilemma comparing myself to my little brother...I suppose the fact that he's MANAGER and only making $5K more than me is really not that great. Maybe it's better to be a staff person making $75K instead of a manager making $80K. Besides, with my annual bonus of $15K, I rake in a total of $90K. My bonuses are 20%. His are only 12%, which brings him right up to $90K. So looking at it that way, we are on par to the tee!
You really need to consistently go to counseling to find out why this is so important to you.
I don't know if it was every jealousy, maybe a small amount but more frustration with where I am vs. where my siblings are at in life. Right now I am working as a waiter at a military base and it sucks. This is not what my college degree is in. My siblings all have great jobs and are making good salaries and are in their careers in life. I will be there shortly now that I got my internship.
Well, there's one profound question that I'd like to ask you all:
Would you rather be in my shoes or in my brother's shoes?
Also, for those of you saying "dude you make $75K, what are you complaining about?" Well, $75K is just average for my metropolitan area. It's not great, believe it or not. An entry level home here is $350K - $400K.
Well, there's one profound question that I'd like to ask you all:
Would you rather be in my shoes or in my brother's shoes?
Your brothers shoes. He's always happy, no matter what.
Why would I possibly want to be in your shoes? Even if you were the taller, smarter, better looking, richer brother I wouldn't want to be in your shoes.
Well, there's one profound question that I'd like to ask you all:
Would you rather be in my shoes or in my brother's shoes?
Also, for those of you saying "dude you make $75K, what are you complaining about?" Well, $75K is just average for my metropolitan area. It's not great, believe it or not. An entry level home here is $350K - $400K.
I have no reason to compete with my siblings.
As long as I'm making enough to get everything I want and need (and I have a good job), I'm OK.
Job hopping isn't a problem in this economy, job hopping is the only reason I make as much as I do now. If I hadn't moved around I'd probably be making $16/hr or something else crappy and be unhappy. I'm currently making more money than I ever have AND I LOVE my job. LOVE IT. So OP hop away to find something that makes you happy.
You'll never be happy if you constantly compare yourself to others. Time to learn to start counting your blessings, your health, your job, your friends, your family, etc. If you walk around being morose that you don't have what your brother has, well you'll never be happy.
I have friends who make more than I do, have a home, etc. I'm still renting (I'm 31 too btw), but TBH I'm focusing on myself and my life and I know I'm doing well for myself, and that I will continue to do better. I've told myself to stop comparing myself to others who are "better off" than I am, and make sure that I realize that in all actuality, with the state of this economy, I'm doing REALLY well.
I know everyone is criticizing you harshly, but I'm here to say that it's natural. It's completely normal to be jealous. Just remember that everyone has a battle that they are fighting. Your brother may be battling depression, money troubles, not getting along with his significant other, and a plethora of other things. The grass isn't always greener. Be happy with where you are and keep working hard.
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