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Any money the kid makes is kind of beside the point, until they are completely supporting themselves. Because you are still on the hook to cover whatever expenses they cannot. So just because she makes say $500 a month, that doesn't mean squat in the scheme of things. I really don't understand how one can be this spineless with their child. How can you tell her how to spend her money? Who's in charge here? When she's on her own, that's when she gets to decide. Until then, as long as you are covering what she can't, you are in charge. I'm kind of shocked this has to be pointed out. If she gives you the "its my money", kindly outline how much you are contributing per month to cover her expenses. It will be an eye opener for her.
Teach her to save money, and use it on something useful, like a car. Offer to match whatever she saves so she can buy a car when she is 16. Some money on a concert ticket or some other luxury here or there is fine, but she shouldn't be blowing all her cash on these things. Teach her how it's going to work once she leaves the nest.
Because we need to plan how conversations might go.
Yeah we could say "Who's in charge?" but that's an empty threat because we can't actually throw her out at 13. So if we point out how much we contribute, she could say "Fine, don't contribute anything." And then what? We are clearly still going to run our household.
Someone wrote me: "13 yr old on farms work 25-30 hrs, let the kid work whatever she wants as long as grades dont suffer"
There was no name attached. I hope it's OK to post here.
I assume this means that while what you say might be true, it's never enforced?
I'm not the one who wrote the message, but federal regulations don't apply to all businesses. In any case, you are the parent, not Congress.
I think a lot depends on the work schedule. Will it conflict with after school activities? Can she put in 4 hours on a Saturday and do 2 hours a day for 3 days during the week? If she is at loose ends after school and before you get off work, 2 hours doing data entry would let her earn money and keep her out of trouble.
You also need to look at working conditions and make sure she isn't being stuck in some windowless closet. Many businesses are returning to sweat shop working conditions, and you need to make sure this business isn't one of them.
I think it's great. I got my first hourly job when I was 13. It gives a kid a sense of responsibility, and you can't start too early to teach a work ethic. Be a parent and monitor the situation, and things should work out fine.
Can you please go back to the basics. A 13 year old cannot legally hold job. Parents are pushing it for whatever reason? Fine. Someone will talk sooner or later and it will hit employer and parents. Fine.
Labor laws for farmer's children working on the family farm are different.
If you work on a farm for your own family member (often the parents), then the labor laws allow for children under the age of 14 to work.
If you do church work, the labor laws may change.
If your daughter would just be working for some company, not affiliated with your church, and not a farm owned by you, then the labor laws DO NOT ALLOW for your child to work. Curious that the company would be willing to violate the labor laws, since they could get in massive trouble with the government for doing so. If it will be illegal work, then 1) it's not something she'd necessarily want to put on a resume, and 2) she may not be treated very well.
I think your post is fake. But if it's not, then you seem like an awful parent for thinking this would be appropriate. Why are you even looking for a job for your 13 year old? It sounds like you believe you'll benefit from the arrangement - how much are you going to start charging your kid for rent, food, clothes, etc., at the age of 13?
If you work on a farm for your own family member (often the parents), then the labor laws allow for children under the age of 14 to work.
If you do church work, the labor laws may change.
If your daughter would just be working for some company, not affiliated with your church, and not a farm owned by you, then the labor laws DO NOT ALLOW for your child to work. Curious that the company would be willing to violate the labor laws, since they could get in massive trouble with the government for doing so. If it will be illegal work, then 1) it's not something she'd necessarily want to put on a resume, and 2) she may not be treated very well.
I think your post is fake. But if it's not, then you seem like an awful parent for thinking this would be appropriate. Why are you even looking for a job for your 13 year old? It sounds like you believe you'll benefit from the arrangement - how much are you going to start charging your kid for rent, food, clothes, etc., at the age of 13?
What's the difference between working for a church and working for a company?
What kind of trouble would the company be in? If it's not anything too massive, I assume they wouldn't involve us.
How did all these other posters get away with working from 12-13 if it's so horrible?
Why do you think she won't be treated very well? Someone doesn't just magically become infinitely more mature when they turn 14.
OP- then go have her apply- why are you even still debating it? Youre going to go do it anyway or you wouldnt keep posting " but how can we get in trouble?"
Hostility is due to this environment where kids can't be kids anymore. It is absurd to be considering an "acceptable" drop in grades so she can go out and work (illegally). This isn't a career, its a job that requires little to no skill set. Colleges don't weigh job experience as much as they do volunteer work, sports, activities, etc. What is the upside? Why must she work as soon as possible..? Are you strapped for cash? Why not start her own business walking dogs, babysitting, etc where she can set up her own hours, learns how to manage time/money, etc. Something like that would stand out more then getting a entry level data job.
Oh give me a break! Ten hours a week is not going to blight her childhood. It's also unlikely to affect her grades, unless a lot of pocket money leads to goofing off.
You see the result of extended childhoods all around you. People reach age 18 and are unemployable because they are undisciplined and lazy. If this kid is motivated and active, she just needs guidance to develop the discipline to make it work. You developed a bad attitude because you didn't want to work. Other people would respond much differently.
But you also see plenty of people who didn't start working at 13 and are very successful. I began working at 15, and looking back, I won't even consider allowing my child to work until 16, maybe 17. It was a lot of responsibility. I'm now in a career and can barely remember a time I wasn't working. It does teach responsibility, but there are other ways to teach it just as effectively. We are not talking about a high school student. We are talking about a 13 year old. This mother is delusional and in her mind thinking that any relevant work experience is going to help her get a good paying job. It isn't. The truth is, if she studies as hard as she would work, and then starts working when she is finishing high school or entering college and is expected to pay for things like cell phone, gas, a car payment etc she will be much better off and have a better chance at success than to begin working so young.
Fine, if this was a sophomore in highschool we could discuss this, maybe a junior. The kid is 13 and the parent asked about work experience versus the child focusing on maitaining good grades. One certainly trumps the other. Period.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Larry Caldwell
Oh give me a break! Ten hours a week is not going to blight her childhood. It's also unlikely to affect her grades, unless a lot of pocket money leads to goofing off.
You see the result of extended childhoods all around you. People reach age 18 and are unemployable because they are undisciplined and lazy. If this kid is motivated and active, she just needs guidance to develop the discipline to make it work. You developed a bad attitude because you didn't want to work. Other people would respond much differently.
I didn't "want" to work? No, I didn't want to HAVE to work. There is a difference. There is a difference between working to live and living to work. I maintained a 3.9 GPA and was in all honors and AP classes throughout high school while working 20-30 hours a week. But working at that age because you know if you don't you won't have gas money to even get to school or have money for food is different then working when you want to for concert tickets, spending money for vacation with friends, etc.
The poster sounds fake. It sounds like the other said.. It's the 13 year old trying to post and find ways to convince her parents that working is okay.
From what others are saying its not about work in general. Kids working is fine. It is this job in particular. It sounds shady.. They don't "feel like hiring college kids anymore".. They'd rather hire a middle school kid off the books?
And what parent would seriously post how this job would be better off for their daughter since it will open more doors then a college education? None that I know of.
Earning 85% in courses generally means B's or C's in most schools, while a 95% is an A. So we are talking about a 2.7 GPA versus a 3.9 GPA.
I do not think that a 2.7 GPA with data entry work experience is better than a 3.9 GPA without data entry work experience.
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I didn't "want" to work? No, I didn't want to HAVE to work. There is a difference. There is a difference between working to live and living to work. I maintained a 3.9 GPA and was in all honors and AP classes throughout high school while working 20-30 hours a week. But working at that age because you know if you don't you won't have gas money to even get to school or have money for food is different then working when you want to for concert tickets, spending money for vacation with friends, etc. 
