Managers, am I employable at all? (employed, collect, tips, degree)
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I'm a straight-A student. I love going to school, learning new things, and doing volunteer work, but I can't seem to hold down a decent paying job for anything. Here are some of my unsuccessful experiences.
1. My first job was at a McDonald's when I was 17. I only worked part-time on the weekends, so I guess they didn't need me for much. I didn't finish all of my training and instead tried to jump right in helping some of the other crew members. I asked someone to train me on the cash register, but I was very nervous and gave someone the wrong change the first time I tried. My boss didn't seem to like me. I tried to function as a good employee, but I never got any feedback from anyone. I felt nervous, but I didn't know what I exactly I was doing wrong. I reported planned absences for tests and college prep to my coworkers so that they would tell my boss, but somehow the messages never got to him. I was eventually fired.
2. My second job was at a pizza place. I was a delivery driver, and not much could go wrong, but I should have invested in a GPS, because I couldn't read the map. I was still in training, and my boss didn't act like it was much of a problem. He did have to give away a free pizza or two, though. I didn't really even have time to get fired. I ended up crashing my car doing something unrelated to work, so I was no longer able to deliver pizza.
3. My third job was at some kind of fast food diner. I was about nineteen. I was working as a waitress, because I thought it would give me a lot of freedom and flexibility. I couldn't keep up, though, and the fact that my coworkers frequently made fun of me didn't help at all. I hated that some of them had authority over me, because they never, in my estimation, treated me fairly. I ended up getting fired after giving away food to a few customers after the card machine stopped working. It was really just supposed to be a prank. I planned to pay for the tickets myself. They left me with the card customers and the headaches that went with having to explain that the machine was broken, and I didn't want to try to deal with it that night. It was a stupid thing to do. I had planned to pay for it myself, but business picked up, and I never got around to it. I was hoping things would straighten themselves out without me having to tell my boss what I did, but I never explained it well enough or took care of those tickets in time. I kind of don't understand, though, why my boss said nothing to the head waitress when she put me in the back doing dishes instead of letting me wait on customers and collect my tips. I just decided to scare them that night to show them I was tired of the way they were treating me. I was fired, and my boss didn't even listen to my side of the story. Okay, that one was my fault, but they didn't have the right to be so mean to me and make me want to quit. I guess I should have quit, though, instead of acting out. I realize now that I could have gotten into major trouble for that one, and it was extremely naive and stupid. It was my first time really on my own, and I felt like people owed me something. This was after a fire claimed my parents' house, and I was caught couch surfing and trying to get back on my feet. Having my coworkers kick me when I was down was really the last thing I needed. They somehow found out I was, more or less, homeless. I took that job on the night shift to avoid sleeping at the houses of friends and relatives at night.
4. My fourth job was after I finished college. I got a very small part-time job at a Chinese restaurant, and, again, I couldn't work the silly card machine. I would frequently charge one card with multiple orders, not good for business at all. I didn't mean to; I just couldn't pay attention long enough to do it correctly. There was a lot going on in that restaurant; visiting with the customers often resulted in me forgetting more important tasks. I really was trying, though.
5. My current job is as a substitute teacher. It feels like the same story. I can't pay attention to everything that's going on in the classroom, and I still don't know who to ask to get things done. I try pretty hard; I copy the students' names and make notes of their clothing, facial features, hairstyles, etc. so that I can identify them if one of them misbehaves, but it seems like my labor is in vain. It feels like my classes are the worst. I have a teaching license; the other subs may not, but my organization system does not work, and the students frequently make fun of me. It's a real slap in the face after finishing all of that coursework to learn how to teach them. I know that they don't see it that way, though, and I think I've at least learned to put up with it. Since it is my only source of income, I try to stay below the radar most days. I can't help but wonder, though, what is wrong?
I notice that in certain settings, I'm really nervous around people. It's better now that I'm older, but I used to be so bad that I couldn't even look people in the eye. I still get the feeling that people are judging me in situations where I feel I'm expected to perform, but when I was a teen and young adult, it was much worse. I also have trouble really paying attention to repetitive tasks. I go on autopilot, but it's only an approximation of what I'm supposed to be doing. I may give customers the wrong change, burn food, ring up the wrong amount, or some other "careless" error, even when I try very hard to concentrate.
OP, please take this in the positive frame that I am presenting it to you with. As someone who has successfully fought through similar issues, have you considered speaking with a therapist? There are very real issues that could manifest in the ways that you describe in your post - and these issues are absolutely fixable. May be the best decision you have ever made if you make that first step. Good luck.
sounds like you aren't meant for working with people or at least in food industry? look for jobs where you are left to yourself, sounds like you are timid, lack self confidence and doesn't handle stress well if things don't go as expected, and you can't go around pranking/scaring your co-workers because you are frustrated with them either
doing well in school doesn't amount to much, school is school, working is about mixing what you learned in school with social situations... you can teach someone material a lot easier than teaching them to be a good fit, so you can see why people prefer hiring people with social skills then training them.
well, I'm not a manager so I can't say if you would be hired but someone with a past of giving things away for free to avoid a headache doesn't sound too good
OP, please take this in the positive frame that I am presenting it to you with. As someone who has successfully fought through similar issues, have you considered speaking with a therapist? There are very real issues that could manifest in the ways that you describe in your post - and these issues are absolutely fixable. May be the best decision you have ever made if you make that first step. Good luck.
I agree with stygmata, about seeing professional help that is outside of an online forum.
I sort of relate in part to some of your work and social experiences, kmb501, in the past. There were some places where I had worked that I just did not fit in and was the odd one out. And co-workers can be nasty and make fun of others. Sometimes others' behavior reminds me that I never left high school while being at work.
Based on what you describe, I believe you can find work and keep a job long term as you have obtained some goals like finishing your degree, you just have to sort through why you don't seem to concentrate after receiving instruction or orders at the workplace. Not properly carrying out instructions properly while working job is a big deal and it seems like to me you have had that problem at your jobs repeatedly.
I'm going to be straight with you - at least in your initial jobs you were a loose cannon. You made decisions on your own, and they were bad ones.
Also, you're coming across as immature and ditzy by blaming the "silly card machine" rather than face the fact that it may have been you and your inability to grasp the concept of how it works.
I wonder if you have undiagnosed ADD. I would do as others have suggested and seek some medical advice.
I was thinking the same thing about ADD. Also I agree with the other posters about seeing a therapist.
You also need to work on something that matches your skill set. If you aren't detail oriented, do not do a job where that is a key requirement. It sounds to me like you may get a little frazzled in high stress situations. Maybe you should try one of those career surveys to find something that is a better fir for what you are good at!
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