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I started at the library and stayed there until I was finished with community college. I paid for that myself. Then I got a job as a receptionist to cover for someone going on maternity leave. She didn't come back, so I stayed there. That job came about when my mom mentioned I was looking for a job, and a lady in her Bible study said that her husband was looking for someone. In that instance, it was about who we knew. I've been in office jobs ever since except for the four years after my son was born.
Our family is not wealthy. I never worked for my parents. I am not, nor have I ever been, entitled. There are many ways to avoid both retail and fast food, you just have to look for them.
I wonder if any of the Walton kids have worked retail... probably not
I agree that this shouldn't be limited to retail... food service, tech support, and customer service can all share the similar pool of woes. A comedian once joked that everyone should be required to work in retail or customer service for at least one year
As mentioned by others, it's possible to never work in retail without being spoiled nor privileged.
Me, I've had periods of unemployment, so whenever I encountered a retail person then, HE has a job, whereas I didn't. That still tops me, even though I may still make more $$ then he ever will in the long run.
An article once stated how middle class folk tend to tip the best. Lower class can't really afford to eat out. Middle class folk have worked much waiting tables, so they know the struggles and how it is. That would make the upper class clueless apparently.
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Originally Posted by masmartbottom
Because it makes them unable to relate to the struggles that most of us have to deal with, and therefore, they lack compassion.
Also, in a world where many people struggle just to survive, it's really not fair. I also think people do their kids a huge disservice by doing that, because they don't learn how the world really works. All they learn is how to be an overprivileged jerk.
Just like how not everyone who attends college will be a success, the converse (not attending college doesn't mean you'll be a failure), having retail experience does seem to be just one of many factors.
There was a TV series which ending I thought was was quite ironic and interesting....
the ending...
Spoiler
a high school graduate and genius ends up going to Harvard, working as a janitor to pay his expenses, instead of taking a very high paying (6 figures IIRC!?) computer job. His mom kept him from doing so, and he was pissed. Her reasoning? He may be able to buy his way into politics, but this way, you'd have gone through the struggles, and will care about the common man
This person also made a joke at my expense-- "My son works retail so he'll be motivated to not do that for the rest of his life " which was a rather repulsive jab at me and my situation.
I just wonder what would make someone want to be so rude and nasty to a total stranger on a message board, especially someone who has fallen on the worst of times. That's just evil.
If your life is so good, why do you feel the need to drag me down? Maybe things aren't so great for you if you need to say that kind of stuff to me.
Easy for me.
First job - between high school and college - analyzing radar data
Second jobs - summers in college - programming (assembler)
Third job - after college - programming
...
There's a common perception by people that they're better than cashiers, and it really needs to stop.
Why exactly do these people, who can't even grasp basic manners, think they're better than me? Most of them are quite stupid, too, and don't even know how to run their debit cards. A lot of them can't even remember the date or locate a business themselves. Or throw away their own trash. They expect me to do all this for them.
I never worked retail. I worked as a dishwasher/ice cream scooper at a restaurant for 2 weeks and that's the closest.
1st job (during high school) - assistant at a government office
2nd job (high school and college) - drafter
3rd job (internship) - research assistant for study
4th job (in college) - worked in a lab at a a government facility
5th job (in college) - research in one of the faculty labs at college
And from there all my jobs have been directly related to my college degree. And I have done some odd jobs here and there. Pet walking, house sitting, web development, tutoring, etc.
I do wish I'd tried working in a restaurant or retail for at least a little while though, just so I would understand better how to interact with those in those jobs and know what would make them happy. I guess that's a bit silly.
This person also made a joke at my expense-- "My son works retail so he'll be motivated to not do that for the rest of his life " which was a rather repulsive jab at me and my situation.
I just wonder what would make someone want to be so rude and nasty to a total stranger on a message board, especially someone who has fallen on the worst of times. That's just evil.
If your life is so good, why do you feel the need to drag me down? Maybe things aren't so great for you if you need to say that kind of stuff to me.
I don't think the comment was made entirely at your expense. I work in a technical field that requires a good amount of training to enter. More than one of my colleagues did real manual labor growing up (i.e. farming) and all of them have mentioned that this was a significant motivating factor in pursuing their education toward a lucrative technical career.
You mentioned that parents should push their kids toward a retail job to build sympathy, but I think motivation to consider the value of education is a more compelling reason. Lots of kids think college is only about pursuing what they're interested in and as parents it's important to make kids see past college and think about their future careers.
Quote:
Originally Posted by masmartbottom
There's a common perception by people that they're better than cashiers, and it really needs to stop.
Why exactly do these people, who can't even grasp basic manners, think they're better than me? Most of them are quite stupid, too, and don't even know how to run their debit cards. A lot of them can't even remember the date or locate a business themselves. Or throw away their own trash. They expect me to do all this for them.
And they think they're better than me. lol. Okay.
I think your perception of what customers think of you may be biased. I never got the impression people thought they were better than cashiers. Some certainly think that you're working for them and expect you to behave that way. Others just aren't very nice. Also, I wouldn't say that a customer not being good at your job doesn't necessarily mean that they're not good a their job.
Based on your general disdain for customers, I wonder why you're even in retail. I'd think there'd be a host of jobs you could do that wouldn't involve direct contact with the public. Those jobs would likely involve harder work than simply being a cashier, but you wouldn't have to deal with people. It seems like you'd might be happier.
It's been told to me that some people have "never worked retail" so that's why they're so mean and rude to cashiers.
As someone who has cashiered for years, I must admit I envy this.
How do people manage to avoid customer service jobs their whole life? I assume some must be straight from high school to mommy and daddy financed college, then perfect job in mommy/daddy's company, but there must be others.
I'd like to hear how people avoid retail their whole lives. I'm intrigued. I always figured it was a stopover, like fast food, but some avoid it. I'd love to hear how they managed it.
I also assume a good chunk of the retail avoiders are very wealthy/trust fund babies. But I wonder how ordinary folks managed it.
You make a lot of assumptions about other people and then get angry in this thread when people assume things about you.
I have never worked in fast food/retail. I grew up in a blue collar household in a very expensive city. My mom never worked. There were many years where there were tough times and by Wednesday, my mom would tell us nothing else was being bought the rest of the week because we didn't have the money. Nada.
My parents didn't give me a dime for college. I went to the cheapest college I could (city) and lived at home most of the time. I had work study that paid for things here or there, found every possible grant and scholarship that I could apply for and went on my merry way. I ended up majoring in something that I didn't even understand at the time and only did it because I was desperate to graduate.
I have never been rude to anyone in a service job---not a cashier, not a waitress, not a shoe salesman---no one. I always say please, thank you, have a nice day, etc.
It's time to wake up---rude, miserable people are rude and miserable to EVERYONE---not just "lowly" cashiers. Nasty people are nasty to everyone, even their own family.
Quote:
Originally Posted by masmartbottom
Because it makes them unable to relate to the struggles that most of us have to deal with, and therefore, they lack compassion.
Also, in a world where many people struggle just to survive, it's really not fair. I also think people do their kids a huge disservice by doing that, because they don't learn how the world really works. All they learn is how to be an overprivileged jerk.
Yeah, I grew up totally privileged, as evidenced by not working in retail.
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Originally Posted by masmartbottom
Yes. I envy people who live comfortable, perfect lives never having to worry about mountains of cc debt and student loan debt. I envy people who get to see Paris, London, and Rome. I envy people who get to go out on cruises and see every beautiful ocean. I envy people who get to drive nice new cars that don't break down. I envy people who work jobs where nobody can just waltz in and get them fired. I envy people who never have to worry about the refrigerator going empty, utilities getting shut off, and kids going hungry or dss coming and having them taken away (my mother chose to be poor and me and my siblings could have been taken).
Only a fool wouldn't envy someone. It's not about the money. it's about being able to live life fully and unencumbered and without worry. If I could have all that without a dime spent, then I wouldn't give a hoot about money. It's what money can give you, a beautiful, rich, meaningful life without worrying about how you're going to eat or whether there's going to be a shred of clothing to cover your bottom.
I'm sick of the rich people on here talking about how jealous I am. So what? Of course my life sucks. Of course I wish I had better. Of course I'm jealous of people whose lives are better, because I want a better life. It's not rocket science and there's nothing wrong with how I feel.
You feel envious, that's fine. But it's oozing out of you and just turning into bitterness and resentment. If you think people IRL can't sense that, well---you're wrong. And it'll be hard to find another job with the overwhelming chip on your shoulder.
I grew up in a pretty affluent area so I know what it's like to envy others. I was the only one of my friends who qualified for free lunch and vouchers for stuff (like AP exams) in school. My friends asked me to take driver's ed with them (couldn't afford it), go to prom (couldn't afford it), go on the senior trip (couldn't afford it), etc.
I didn't have any real job prospects when I graduated so I joined a program like TFA that paid for a MS, had to leave that job and was unemployed for months with zero income. I took a crappy job out of desperation. Then had to take another crappy job out of desperation. (Went back to the field that my BS was in out of desperation and need.) Got laid-off and was unemployed again. Desperately searched for jobs for months in a field where there is supposedly a "shortage." It took me YEARS to get back to where I was in 2008.
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Originally Posted by masmartbottom
In terms of pay, mine is the bottom of the barrel.
So what other jobs/positions have you been applying to? What are you doing to improve your situation?
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Originally Posted by masmartbottom
I don't know why I'm laying my soul bare here, but I'm angry. My dad died when I was a kid and left me with nothing. No life insurance policy, no inheritance, nothing. He had an addiction that pretty much decimated any money he earned. It was all gone.
My mother chose to collect government assistance her whole life and never work. Of course my parents didn't give me anything to pay for college.
I don't appreciate a person implying that not only does my family suck, but I am obviously a worthless human being who didn't even deserve scholarships and who doesn't value education. It's completely vicious. I am absolutely floored by what this person has said to me. It's just so incredibly unkind and horrible.
Elsewhere this person stated that I'm bad at my job and I'm a bitter ----- who deserves to get fired.
You are thirty and you are an adult. Your parents' decisions no longer have any impact on you.
My mom was pregnant in HS. She married the alcoholic and had another kid. Divorced shortly thereafter. Then she married another alcoholic (my father---who used to bring me the bar with him when I was in elementary school) and had two more kids. My mom has never worked. My dad has worked but when I was younger he spent a lot of that money on other things, obviously. They live paycheck to paycheck so I'm not getting an inheritance.
So you know what I did? It took me a long time, but I managed to graduate from college. I told myself no matter what stupid things my parents did, I was going to try my hardest to make my life better. I've tried to make smart financial decisions and even when I was unemployed, I applied to EVERYTHING---nothing was off limits. Even with a B.S. and an M.S., I had no problem walking into stores and filling out applications---yes, even retail. I applied to jobs like crazy while I was unemployed and had my resume out there.
Not sure what you want to go into, since you haven't said what you wanted to do in order to get out a retail, but that might help people give you suggestions. My now-husband graduated with a political science degree and then ended up being a garbage man because he couldn't find a job---then he eventually went back to school, volunteered to write on a website and eventually got a job in the field he wanted to pursue---but it wasn't easy and took a lot of determination.
Most people don't just have things handed to them and the sooner you accept that, the sooner you can improve your situation. I don't know many people who have trust funds or who have gotten jobs because their family owns a business---that's actually a pretty small percentage of folks.
There are better ways to spend your time than mocking someone else's misfortune, rubbing someone's face in your advantages that they clearly lacked, and mocking them for things they had no control over.
I don't know why I'm laying my soul bare here, but I'm angry. My dad died when I was a kid and left me with nothing. No life insurance policy, no inheritance, nothing. He had an addiction that pretty much decimated any money he earned. It was all gone.
My mother chose to collect government assistance her whole life and never work. Of course my parents didn't give me anything to pay for college.
I don't appreciate a person implying that not only does my family suck, but I am obviously a worthless human being who didn't even deserve scholarships and who doesn't value education. It's completely vicious. I am absolutely floored by what this person has said to me. It's just so incredibly unkind and horrible.
Elsewhere this person stated that I'm bad at my job and I'm a bitter ----- who deserves to get fired.
You are 30 and still can't control your life, because you keep blaming your parents.
You are not alone. Many of us have gone through worse family situations. We aren't using it as a pity party to stay in the same situation.
I was homeless by 20 with no father or mother to depend on. I was homeless for over a year, but I stayed in a shelter for the last 8 months. I lost over 40 lbs through starvation. Somebody commented on my ribs showing, after I changed clothes. I didn't have a degree.
Did I blame my parents until I was 30? Nope. It was all on me. I knew if I kept blaming them, I would be poor and homeless into my 30's or worse.
In the first month of staying at the shelter, I started working in fast food throwing tacos together. The shelter gave me a haircut, slacks, a white button down shirt and a tie.
By the 2nd month, I landed a $8/hr file clerk position at a temp agency.
I went through multiple layoffs, but each time I picked up a new skill in the evenings. Now I make around $90k/yr without a degree.
I found similar situations in other people that you would not suspect. You think you are alone and everything was handed to us. We had gone through situations that were bad too, but we don't put our control in somebody that may not even be alive anymore.
The only advice that I can provide you is take personal responsibility. You can keep blaming your father, who has been deceased for decades, or you can take personal responsibility. If you choose the former, there's no advice from internet strangers that can help. You might as well ignore us.
As someone who has cashiered for years, I must admit I envy this.
How do people manage to avoid customer service jobs their whole life? I assume some must be straight from high school to mommy and daddy financed college, then perfect job in mommy/daddy's company, but there must be others.
Wow, ouch. I would call that bitterness and not envy.
I had written that first, then I went back and read this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by masmartbottom
I don't appreciate a person implying that not only does my family suck, but I am obviously a worthless human being who didn't even deserve scholarships and who doesn't value education. It's completely vicious. I am absolutely floored by what this person has said to me. It's just so incredibly unkind and horrible.
Elsewhere this person stated that I'm bad at my job and I'm a bitter ----- who deserves to get fired.
You do sound bitter. Lots of people grow up in lousy homes. At some point we have to rise above it and decide what we are going to do with our lives. Somehow we have to put aside our jealousy to people that have had an easy and better families.
Quote:
Originally Posted by masmartbottom
It's been told to me that some people have "never worked retail" so that's why they're so mean and rude to cashiers.
As for people that are mean to retail people, not all retail people should be in Customer Service, some really do suck at it.
I work with a large number of people, we are all in Customer Service. There are a couple that are just unhappy--get another job if you don't like working with people.
Last edited by GiGi603; 02-08-2015 at 05:56 AM..
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