How Do You Respond To Colleagues Who Ask Your Personal Questions (2014, work)

[Spedizzo]

Well, you could also turn it into a joke;

Like if someone asks a question that you don't want to answer, just smile and in a joking/friendly manner ask them, "what, are you writing a book?" and try to just blow off the question without it looking like it really bothers you.

[Suncc49]

If you don't find a way to socially obscurely answer these questions you will become the workplace pariah. Suck it up and take one for the team by responding.

[fishbrains]

You really find that level of information invasive? Other than salary, and perhaps student loan info, I have shared much more than that without any concern at all.

It would be socially obtuse to meet somebody and ask them a list of questions like this, but in the course of casual conversation these things are likely to come up. I don't see what the problem is.

Questions on marriage and children are so basic I am surprised anybody even mentions this as a problem. I have given people my exact address without a thought. When I was living in NY, asking about rent was almost considered a social icebreaker.

Keep this info private if you like, but avoiding the issue entirely is going to get you labeled as the weird guy.

[NewYorkiforniainHouston]

"Why do you ask?"

[BigDGeek]

Originally Posted by RNW2015

In the past I've had coworkers ask

1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans

The only people who ask me those questions are the Indians. Americans (and people from other countries) don't ask me those kinds of questions. Like, ever. At all.

[Arcenal813]

Originally Posted by RNW2015

So how do you respond to colleagues who ask personal questions at work. I know many people don't mind sharing their personal lives but I'm not one of them.

In the past I've had coworkers ask

1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans


Often times when these and other questions come up especially during an initial conversation with a colleague I think "none of your business" but I have yet to figure out how to politely either not respond or vaguely respond. If you are like me how have you successfully avoided colleagues who can ask a million and one questions which have nothing to do with work. How can you tell them to back off without having them turn into a workplace enemy

Please let me know any tips or suggested answers.

Please don't respond with "just get to know them" or "don't be so secretive" or the like

Thanks guys

1. Married (Why WOULDN'T I want to answer that?)
2. 2
3. I give approximate locations. Sometimes cross street if they're familiar with the area
4. The truth
5. The truth
6. No one asks me that. Even my wife doesn't know MY EXACT salary. She knows approx how much I make, and vice versa.
7. The truth
8. The truth
9. The truth.

[Nate_VA]

For gay people like myself, some of these questions can be awkward to answer.

[convextech]

Originally Posted by RNW2015

So how do you respond to colleagues who ask personal questions at work. I know many people don't mind sharing their personal lives but I'm not one of them.

In the past I've had coworkers ask

1. Are you dating/ married
2. How many children do you have
3. Where do you live (giving them the city wasn't good enough) they want cross streets
4. What does your spouse do for work
5. What type of work did your parent do
6 how much money are you making
7 how old are you
8 how much do you pay in rent/ mortgage
9 how much did you have in student loans


Often times when these and other questions come up especially during an initial conversation with a colleague I think "none of your business" but I have yet to figure out how to politely either not respond or vaguely respond. If you are like me how have you successfully avoided colleagues who can ask a million and one questions which have nothing to do with work. How can you tell them to back off without having them turn into a workplace enemy

Please let me know any tips or suggested answers.

Please don't respond with "just get to know them" or "don't be so secretive" or the like

Thanks guys

Those bolded are no brainers. If I had a colleague that wouldn't even make nice enough to discuss this, I'd let you sit by yourself and rot. That's not being nosy, it's being polite.

[thatguydownsouth]

Im typically cautious of people who DONT talk about their personal lives with coworkers. You spend 40+ hours a week with these people and most likely will do so for a good chunk of your life...I wonder if these super secret people have bodys buried in their yards.....

[mkpunk]

Some I'll answer, some I won't. If I am not in the middle of a duty, I'll answer it then, if not I'll talk about out later because our job is more important.