Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I totally understand and agree with what you said, however, my post was more about those that while not mentally challenged regardless if whether they have a great support system and friends/family saying they should attend college simply can't study/understand on the level needed to get through college/university.
For example, I know an aquaintance that has a 29 year old daughter. She is by no means mentally/physically challenged but you can see she is different, she passed HS with a 2.5 GPA, took two semesters of community college (two different times) and dropped out saying it's just all too much for her and she just can't understand the school work and she has worked very minimal wage jobs in her small town her life. Right now she works as a cart pusher at wal mart sweating her arse off in 90+ degree heat for the past 2 years. She is quite capable of having long intellectual talks about things she's interested in though.
In my own experience, someone in her situation (intelligent but says school is too much work) frequently has an unacknowledged or unknown issue like dyslexia. She maybe was never tested for it, got through school with her high C and knows that school is harder for her than others, but doesn't know why. One of my mom's friends couldn't read maps and certain patterns on clothing made her squirm. It was't until she was in her 40's when she was randomly talking about it that someone overheard her and told her she was dyslexic. Heh. Poor woman. She is successful enough in life, but she is never going to be a navigator.
Another option I see for your friend is support for her choices. Either family or a significant other; or "the system". Someone allows her to live off of choices like that.
Another option for her might be self esteem. I have no way of knowing what her childhood issues are; but perhaps one or several meaningful people in her life told her she wasn't good enough and that she'd be lucky to have a career pushing carts for Walmart.
Whatever the case may be, I appreciate cart pushers and sometimes find myself a bit envious that some of them get to use that cool little machine to do it. In my mind, it's close to riding the zamboni. There's something to be said for simple jobs that don't require a lot of mental ability. Low stress can be nice.
Of course we always hear how College is for everyone and if people go to college, work hard they can get a degree and have a chance at having some nice salary or at least significantly above minimum wage.
My question is, are there men/women out there that are not mentally challenged or have some debilitating physical/mental challenge yet just simply don't have the aptitude for college, studying, etc.? Basically those that can really only ever be good at low service jobs or jobs that don't require much skill? As in spend most/all of their lives doing menial work or work that doesn't require lots of mental ability.
At one time, that may have been guaranteed, but now its a cost/benefit consideration because many college students are indentured to the system trying to pay back student loans on meager wages. As far as low wage/low skill employees, for some people its all they want or all they can imagine doing, just pull on the harness and start working, no drive to advance, no intentions of moving elsewhere, just punch in, punch out, collect their paycheck at the end of the week. I worked with guys like that many years ago, some were alcoholics and just wanted to pay for their habit, but some were family men that only saw work as a way to support their families. That's why I have to laugh when I hear some yuppies talking about how strapped they are trying to pay for college, new cars, big houses, on 90K- 100K+, and there are people who truly live hand to mouth but never complain.
For example, I know an aquaintance that has a 29 year old daughter. She is by no means mentally/physically challenged but you can see she is different, she passed HS with a 2.5 GPA, took two semesters of community college (two different times) and dropped out saying it's just all too much for her and she just can't understand the school work and she has worked very minimal wage jobs in her small town her life. Right now she works as a cart pusher at wal mart sweating her arse off in 90+ degree heat for the past 2 years. She is quite capable of having long intellectual talks about things she's interested in though.
But, don't you see? If she isn't capable of handling the stress of college, is she going to be able to handle the stress of responsibility? She's more comfortable just doing what she's told and going home at the end of the day.
I'll go against the trend. Where do we draw the line between "stupid" and "retarded"? That may offend some people, but it isn't meant to be offensive. Outside of people that had some awful luck in genes or other developmental issues heaped upon them, everyone can make it through this joke we call college in America. There are many people with disabilities that won't be able to earn minimum wage on their own, but many of them can be helped by social problems.
Note that I'm suggesting people can do more complex work, not that they can get the more complex job. That requires getting past the drones in HR.
My question is, are there men/women out there that are not mentally challenged or have some debilitating physical/mental challenge yet just simply don't have the aptitude for college, studying, etc.?
Yes. It's called "not college material" (or used to be).
I totally understand and agree with what you said, however, my post was more about those that while not mentally challenged regardless if whether they have a great support system and friends/family saying they should attend college simply can't study/understand on the level needed to get through college/university.
For example, I know an aquaintance that has a 29 year old daughter. She is by no means mentally/physically challenged but you can see she is different, she passed HS with a 2.5 GPA, took two semesters of community college (two different times) and dropped out saying it's just all too much for her and she just can't understand the school work and she has worked very minimal wage jobs in her small town her life. Right now she works as a cart pusher at wal mart sweating her arse off in 90+ degree heat for the past 2 years. She is quite capable of having long intellectual talks about things she's interested in though.
While some people do not want to attend, others have never learned how to learn.
Without that skill, learning is a painful process that feels overwhelming, and ultimately impossible or not worth the effort.
In my own experience, someone in her situation (intelligent but says school is too much work) frequently has an unacknowledged or unknown issue like dyslexia. She maybe was never tested for it, got through school with her high C and knows that school is harder for her than others, but doesn't know why. One of my mom's friends couldn't read maps and certain patterns on clothing made her squirm. It was't until she was in her 40's when she was randomly talking about it that someone overheard her and told her she was dyslexic. Heh. Poor woman. She is successful enough in life, but she is never going to be a navigator.
Another option I see for your friend is support for her choices. Either family or a significant other; or "the system". Someone allows her to live off of choices like that.
Another option for her might be self esteem. I have no way of knowing what her childhood issues are; but perhaps one or several meaningful people in her life told her she wasn't good enough and that she'd be lucky to have a career pushing carts for Walmart.
Whatever the case may be, I appreciate cart pushers and sometimes find myself a bit envious that some of them get to use that cool little machine to do it. In my mind, it's close to riding the zamboni. There's something to be said for simple jobs that don't require a lot of mental ability. Low stress can be nice.
Quote:
Originally Posted by snowtired14
But, don't you see? If she isn't capable of handling the stress of college, is she going to be able to handle the stress of responsibility? She's more comfortable just doing what she's told and going home at the end of the day.
I completely see what you are both saying. For one, she doesn't have dyslexia, she has no trouble reading. She just does not like school, or school work or any of the hub bub of life. I do know she has some anxiety/introversion. She hates cities and won't live in one, hence why she still lives in her small town. She did travel to LA for a convention a few years ago but she said she'd never go back, she said being around so many people and such a big place completely overwhelmed her and also she always felt unsafe there. When she wasn't at the convention she was in her motel room.
I do know she has had relationships. She is a very pretty brunette 5'9 woman in great shape, but they don't last because their man either moves or wishes she'd do more.
I do wonder what it will be like for her after her father (mother passed in '03) passes and she has no support? She will get inheritance but it won't last forever. I no she sure has nothing in regards to a 401K or anything like that and probably has very little in her savings account, as she lives paycheck to paycheck; always has.
yes, I know people that have college degrees but happy working at a nursery for minimum wages because of no thinking, no paperwork and minimumal living.
I have siblings in this category. They chose not to pursue education and instead got into their careers from the bottom up and they've achieved that middle class success. They decided that college wasn't their thing and adjusted accordingly.
There are some people who are stuck in low wage jobs through the course of their life due to decisions made earlier that perhaps can not be undone. Maybe you were a cutup in school so you dropped out when you were 16, became a single parent at 17 and started down the path of poverty. If you don't have a proper support system, you can't go to school to correct your mistakes and you pass along that life style to your child(ren). You end up a grandparent at 35. To help your child have a better life than you did, rather than go to college, you take on the burden of grandchild care so your child can go to college.
I'm sure there are some people who stay at low wage jobs for reasons I can't understand, but I don't think many would choose it. If you were born and raised in a low wage, manual labor type home, college might not be something that figures into your future because it's not something you were exposed to as a thing one automatically does after finishing high school. It's simply not a thought-of option for some people because "college" is reserved for those who have more time and money. But people who were born/raised in a "you must go to college" type atmosphere can't understand that, and I think those parents raised in that environment would probably have a harder time accepting a decision of their child to go blue collar.
I guess home life can be a reason, but if you are in high school, you are exposed to the idea of college all the time. If you are low income, it can be practically free.
I completely see what you are both saying. For one, she doesn't have dyslexia, she has no trouble reading. She just does not like school, or school work or any of the hub bub of life. I do know she has some anxiety/introversion. She hates cities and won't live in one, hence why she still lives in her small town. She did travel to LA for a convention a few years ago but she said she'd never go back, she said being around so many people and such a big place completely overwhelmed her and also she always felt unsafe there. When she wasn't at the convention she was in her motel room.
I do know she has had relationships. She is a very pretty brunette 5'9 woman in great shape, but they don't last because their man either moves or wishes she'd do more.
I do wonder what it will be like for her after her father (mother passed in '03) passes and she has no support? She will get inheritance but it won't last forever. I no she sure has nothing in regards to a 401K or anything like that and probably has very little in her savings account, as she lives paycheck to paycheck; always has.
Maybe she just hasn't found her calling. Sad.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
