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Old 12-04-2015, 08:37 AM
 
Location: N/A
846 posts, read 1,881,323 times
Reputation: 937

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Quote:
Originally Posted by convextech View Post
Why wasn't she reported for embezzlement?
In all honesty...I don't know. We don't know if it was $30 or $3k.

I do know that I personally, as a parent, gave her $30 for a tournament...and the next year when we registered for the same tournament, the facility advised that we had a balance due because she skipped the bill.

Is that enough to call someone to investigate?
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Old 12-04-2015, 08:38 AM
 
Location: N/A
846 posts, read 1,881,323 times
Reputation: 937
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
And better auditing practices in place?
Yes, absolutely.
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Old 12-04-2015, 08:46 AM
 
1,858 posts, read 3,104,127 times
Reputation: 4239
OP, I'm not exactly sure of your role in this situation. Are you a member of the board? Do you have first hand proveable knowledge of any of this? I agree with others. If any of this is true (beyond the raiding of players) it should have been reported.

You said it was discussed by the board and a decision was made. To me, that insinuates that a group of people (under the advice of counsel) determined that there was not sufficient evdence of any of it. I certainly hope the serious responsibility to protect minors from sexual abuse was factored into that discussion. If you were on the board, did you raise it?

You cannot just go around spreading unfounded rumors about people. It's put up or shut up time. If you guys know something, go to the authorities (or you go by yourself - if you feel strong enough about it). If not, the. live with your choice.

As someone else said, it sounds like you are most angry about her raiding players. In the whole scheme of things, that is the least of the problem.
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Old 12-04-2015, 08:47 AM
 
Location: On the Chesapeake
45,382 posts, read 60,575,206 times
Reputation: 60996
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
In all honesty...I don't know. We don't know if it was $30 or $3k.

I do know that I personally, as a parent, gave her $30 for a tournament...and the next year when we registered for the same tournament, the facility advised that we had a balance due because she skipped the bill.

Is that enough to call someone to investigate?

Yes. Maybe not police at that point but an outside auditor. I'm surprised that if you're a 501(c) (3) that you didn't have a required yearly or every other year audit.


https://www.irs.gov/Charities-&-Non-...-Organizations


Who was keeping the books and cutting the checks?
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Old 12-04-2015, 09:44 AM
 
Location: N/A
846 posts, read 1,881,323 times
Reputation: 937
Quote:
Originally Posted by dmills View Post
OP, I'm not exactly sure of your role in this situation. Are you a member of the board? Do you have first hand proveable knowledge of any of this? I agree with others. If any of this is true (beyond the raiding of players) it should have been reported.
I'm a parent/coach/whistleblower.

I'm pissed about everything.

It's time for an audit. Thanks everyone.
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Old 12-04-2015, 09:44 AM
 
Location: Upper St. Clair, PA
367 posts, read 458,120 times
Reputation: 994
OP: I just hope you realize that if one of these parents find out at some point in the future that you knew this information and opted not to press charges, that they may come after you and the board. You are all no better then the coach.

I could be one of those parents. Like I said, I have a ten year old daughter that plays lacrosse. If I were one of them and I found out, you have a lawsuit on your hands where you're the defendant. Just hope you realize that. I am almost outraged to the point even as an outsider that I want to look for more information about this team.
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Old 12-04-2015, 09:55 AM
 
Location: Upper St. Clair, PA
367 posts, read 458,120 times
Reputation: 994
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
In all honesty...I don't know. We don't know if it was $30 or $3k.

I do know that I personally, as a parent, gave her $30 for a tournament...and the next year when we registered for the same tournament, the facility advised that we had a balance due because she skipped the bill.

Is that enough to call someone to investigate?
This is travel lacrosse? How were you allowed to participate in a tournament without payment up front? That part doesn't make sense to me. These sponsors disqualify you for nonpayment before you even have a chance to play a game.

I should probably just leave this thread though, it's making me too upset and there's nothing I can do about it. I hope it works out for you, I know you do not mean to be the bad person, but you have failed the kids, which if i lived in your town, would be my kid, and that is why I am upset.

Know that you are in a position of trust from all parents. We bring our kids to you for fun and learn skills. We expect that from the way the team is administrated as well.

Good luck to you, but as I said, I am just gonna bail from this thread before I get too wound up over it since there is nothing I can do.
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Old 12-04-2015, 09:59 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
49,927 posts, read 59,944,601 times
Reputation: 98359
OP, it sounds like you weren't on the board, but as a coach you probably heard these details from some board members.

It's not good.

In our state, PTOs are regulated by the state now because of similar problems with parent volunteers embezzling money, and I think youth sports teams should be as well. It forces teams to be compliant with strict rules.

Of course, you don't need to be gov't regulated to hold yourselves accountable to common-sense rules.
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Old 12-04-2015, 10:07 AM
 
Location: La Jolla, CA
7,284 posts, read 16,684,958 times
Reputation: 11675
Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
We fired her. The parents have no idea as to why we fired her and we were told by counsel that we could not relay this information.
Mod cut.

Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
She is a liar and a thief. She stole money from the players parents and she stole money from our club. She stole supplies and equipment from our storage shed. ...THIS CRAP WENT ON FOR 4 YEARS. This person is now starting her own club...she ransacked our players and mailing lists and we flat out no longer have a team to compete at this age/gender group.
That's the rendition being reported here. Why these serious issues weren't immediately turned over to police (thereby making firing an easy and clean decision with no need to "explain" anything), is anyone's guess.

Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
She grabbed one of the player's behinds and told that player's mother if she was a lesbian she would totally do her.
That's the rendition being reported here. There are two sides to every story, and these youth sports teams are always getting emotionally charged for the parents, who often contribute nothing but drama and conflict. Given that, it's hard to ignore some of the back story, starting with some personally identifying information that you volunteered.


Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
BACKGROUND: I have been playing/coaching lacrosse for almost 25 years. I have played youth, hs, college, and post collegiate levels and I have coached the same...

Flash forward to 2013...the club approached me because they knew I had a daughter in 4th grade that would like to play...so they said that they would let her play up (on a middle school team)...if I agreed to help coach that team.

There are some changes that I would like to make for the next season...like bring on my own assistant coach. One of the parents (another DAD) that came to almost every practice and helped me...I would like to promote him to a formal title of coach.

I approached the board with this request...and was told "no"...not because of the person...but because of their gender...they only want female coaches...as they indicated that any new coach needs to be a female.

They said that I could stay on, but that they wanted more of a female presence.

In 2014...does this sound right? Is this even legal?
It's hard to read this and not wonder a little bit.

Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
I love coaching...especially with my daughter on the field...but this just sounds off to me. What are your thoughts on this topic?
You are too emotionally invested. This never works well for the kids. Just saying. You blew out a coach, she started her own club and gutted yours. You are smearing her on the internet (whether what she did is true or not). You are a coach, you and your daughter's team is probably gutted, and you're pissed off. Frankly, it looks like you're retaliating.

Quote:
Originally Posted by midwestlaxer View Post
SOOOO....any advice on how to proceed?
Probably not what you want to hear, but at this point, you probably ought to shut up.

Last edited by PJSaturn; 12-04-2015 at 11:59 AM.. Reason: Off topic; outing another member.
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Old 12-04-2015, 10:08 AM
 
Location: N/A
846 posts, read 1,881,323 times
Reputation: 937
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessica2099 View Post
This is travel lacrosse? How were you allowed to participate in a tournament without payment up front? That part doesn't make sense to me. These sponsors disqualify you for nonpayment before you even have a chance to play a game.

I should probably just leave this thread though, it's making me too upset and there's nothing I can do about it. I hope it works out for you, I know you do not mean to be the bad person, but you have failed the kids, which if i lived in your town, would be my kid, and that is why I am upset.

Know that you are in a position of trust from all parents. We bring our kids to you for fun and learn skills. We expect that from the way the team is administrated as well.

Good luck to you, but as I said, I am just gonna bail from this thread before I get too wound up over it since there is nothing I can do.
That's what brought me to the old Internet. I feel that I've done everything that I can...but I feel that it is not enough. The board investigated and terminated the coach. No further action...no explanations...nothing communicated other than this lady coached from this date to this date.

It sucks. I was hoping that someone else had a similar experience.

I am also upset and just sick about it.
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