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Join a tribe,it seems completely unatural to me,my ancestors never lived like this,they danced,worked in the fields occasionally,told stories,raised babies,did crafts etc all day.
Exactly. I don't understand why so many people on this forum suggest starting a business to posters who are having trouble in a corporate environment, especially those who feel that corporate hours are too long. While working for a corporation isn't an ideal fit for my personality, I know that starting a business is an even worse fit for my personality, so I work for a corporation as the lesser of two evils.
Yeah, I'm 25, and absolutely dread the thought of working for a corporation. I feel like my personality leads me to being more of an entrepreneur. The only slight regret I have is that I didn't start working on my business sooner, but I guess everything happens in a timeline for a reason. Even 2 years ago, I never even thought of having a business.
Seems like I always had the entrepreneur spirit, but didn't realize it till about a year ago.
OP, it’s been a long time since it’s been chic for a woman to say she’s not cut out for work, but the more time I spend working, the more times I think “maybe the Victorians were onto something when they proclaimed women ‘too delicate’ to do XYZ.” I know I’m too delicate, because I too am only an admin, and it’s too much work for me. Precisely because: I am good at my job, in fact too good; to the extent that I do take the stress home with me, and I can’t turn it off at the end of the day. I am great for my employers; they are pee-poor for me in return, except insofar as “well, we haven’t fired you yet”. White collar people don’t realize how their counterparts make their “pink collar” counterparts suffer for their money. “Your stress is not mine. I don’t get paid to handle your stress, regardless of what you think, Boss Man (do you even know what I make?? sometimes I doubt it).”
And I gotta say also, OP… it doesn’t get better. A dead end thankless job where you get treated like a maid with a keyboard attached to your fingers, is simply that.
So if you’re gonna do something else – whatever “it” is – prepare to do it now. Anyone suggesting you give it up and look for "popular" jobs, like publishing - well, whatever your favorite version of "popular job" is, you probably know the reason they are popular jobs, is because glamour attaches to them, and there is mucho competish for them. Zero glamour and zero possibility for advancement attaches to quite a few admin jobs, which is the reason why any fool with a BA can pick one up now. The same job my mother, a high school graduate, held in the 70s, I paid many thousands of dollars to get. Yeah, that's progress for women, right?
You know, you make some great points, a lot of which women don't want to hear. I hate the likes of Gloria Steinem and Andrea Dworkins and their ilk for pretty much telling women "you better go out there and show that you are as good as a man or you are worthless!". If I could I'd love to go back to the '50s with my bf and be a SAHM. My bf would have a MUCH easier time finding a job and I would love to be one of those women that have lots of other women come over for tea and just chat about our children and other things.
Now I know many women will yell at me saying "But women had less rights!" and "Women didn't have many choices but to be a SAHM!" To which I say that's why just me and my bf, I am not asking any other women to come along lol. Really though, if you look at the Sexual "Revolution" of the 60s/70s who TRULY benefited from it? Certainly not women. Men sure did though! I just hate how women such as myself have been FORCED to go along with the other "Women can do everything men can do!!!" camp without a say in the matter. Also I have always loved the idea of being a SAHM, even as a teen.
What I find particularly ironic is that in the working world women always complained about how they were treated by men yet boy I can tell you female bosses can treat and view their female subordinates every bit as bad; even more so!
Join a tribe,it seems completely unatural to me,my ancestors never lived like this,they danced,worked in the fields occasionally,told stories,raised babies,did crafts etc all day.
Or read lots and lots of true crime books, an education in itself! As true crime writer Ann Rule says: Perfect crimes are committed everyday in this country!
The characters you read about in true crime books didn't do their homework, and those that have never gotten caught, read these books as comic books!
Back in the middle ages, when the rat race got to you, and you felt like your were going crazy or about to kill someone, they had monasteries where you could check out of the real world, for whatever period of time, and regain your bearings. There, you had some chores to do, but you were safely removed from society.
Today, prisons have taken the place of monasteries!
This is hilarious advice. I would never tell a woman to quit working because her BOYFRIEND has a good career. Boyfriends become ex-boyfriends far more than they become husbands.
I'm not saying the OP should quit her job now just because her boyfriend has a good career. That would be terrible advice. I meant to say that if she ends up getting married to her current boyfriend (or somebody else) and has kids with him that she could quit working and become a SAHM in the future if they're financially stable and mutually agree on the arrangement as a family.
Being a SAHM is the OP's dream job and she should make plans to make that a reality since that job hasn't opened up yet. Unfortunately part of the training for her dream job is having to work for a horrible, childish boss now, which could actually be good preparation for parenthood later on. Many say being a parent is the toughest job in the world-at least being a good parent is. Having a terrible working environment might not be the worst thing even if it seems like it presently. Putting up with an abusive boss might actually make the temper tantrums that come with the terrible 2's tolerable. A bad work environment certainly should provide incentive to leave the workforce ASAP. There's no guarantee that there's greener pastures elsewhere. The OP's next boss could be even worse. It sounds like the OP was born in the wrong era. If this were the 1950s, she would already be a SAHM and wouldn't have to put up with this working nonsense.
Right now the OP's primary objective should be to find a suitable marriage partner with a high enough income (or high-income potential in the near future) who is okay with his wife staying at home with the kids. That's increasingly rare today due to the economy and societal norms, but there are still guys who want to be the sole breadwinners and want their wives to do this. The OP's boyfriend might fit the bill since he is an engineer and says he'd be okay with it. It's important that the husband is on board with it or else there will just be resentment that will make life unpleasant. SAHMs are actually quite common in my low COL area, and it's a real luxury for those who can financially swing it.
I despise the world of work, so I envy the OP for potentially being in a position where she might be able to get out of the workforce at a relatively young age to pursue her dream job. I will be confined to low-wage purgatory for the rest of my life, and I want better for everyone else, so good luck, OP!
This string reminds me of a time when my wife's sister had just flunked out of nursing school in her senior year.
Until then, she had been a total mooch, never worked a day in her life and was really mad that her dad refused to let her move back in and made her get a job.
So I had a friend who was a manager at a local semiconductor plant and we got her a job on the line etching wafers.
About two weeks later she was visiting us and she had just received her first pay check.
She said, "you know, this job is really hard, you have to get up early to be there by 7 AM, You have to wear that hot bunny suit and stand there all day with just a few breaks. And my pay check : OMG look how much they take out for taxes! There is hardly enough left over to live on!"
I should also probably add I realize being a SAHM is most certainly work and it also requires getting up early, when I was 14 my mother gave birth to twins, one of which had colic and since she was working so much I pretty much raised them as well as doing house work. But what's sad is while infants and babies do need lots of attention and can be very hard to please I have found making most bosses happy is even far more of a struggle since they pretty much act just as an infant or baby would when they want something. But at least with infants and babies they have a good excuse to act the way they do.
Please don't throw SAHMs in here.
My suggestion for you as far as your original post is concerned is that you simply find something you enjoy doing and have your own business.
Trying to please everyone, or some boss is a waste of time.
You know, you make some great points, a lot of which women don't want to hear. I hate the likes of Gloria Steinem and Andrea Dworkins and their ilk for pretty much telling women "you better go out there and show that you are as good as a man or you are worthless!". If I could I'd love to go back to the '50s with my bf and be a SAHM. My bf would have a MUCH easier time finding a job and I would love to be one of those women that have lots of other women come over for tea and just chat about our children and other things.
Now I know many women will yell at me saying "But women had less rights!" and "Women didn't have many choices but to be a SAHM!" To which I say that's why just me and my bf, I am not asking any other women to come along lol. Really though, if you look at the Sexual "Revolution" of the 60s/70s who TRULY benefited from it? Certainly not women. Men sure did though! I just hate how women such as myself have been FORCED to go along with the other "Women can do everything men can do!!!" camp without a say in the matter. Also I have always loved the idea of being a SAHM, even as a teen.
What I find particularly ironic is that in the working world women always complained about how they were treated by men yet boy I can tell you female bosses can treat and view their female subordinates every bit as bad; even more so!
While I agree with you that women have not benefited from the so called "sexual revolution", how exactly do you think men have benefited from it?
Most of my male colleagues (I am male, and work in a very male-dominated industry) make all or most of the money for their family, but are still expected to do 50% of the housework and childcare tasks, while their wives spend most of their time shopping and posting on Facebook. When I posted about that here, several male posters said that is because by willing to earn 100% of the income and do 50% of the housework and childcare tasks, it allows them to marry better looking women then they otherwise would have been able to.
This thread reminds me of something I frequently post about but nobody here ever agrees with me: I strongly feel that every field should have at least 2 tracks: a climb the corporate ladder track, and a work-life balance track. Yes, the climb the corporate ladder track should pay more. But the work-life balance track should pay at least a minimal living wage for a family, should only expect employees to work weekends and holidays for extreme emergencies, and should offer job security unless an employee is truly incompetent and unwilling or unable to improve. Too bad nobody here agrees with me.
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