Why is the workplace such a nightmare for so many of us? (companies, interest)
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Location: In a perfect world winter does not exist
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Cubicle work is the worse. All your emotions are in one place, at least with jobs where you get to be out and everywhere your stimulus changes and can change your mood along with meeting people.
Quoted to repost. I think this post deserves special attention.
I work in a company that believes in work hard play hard be friendly to everyone philosophy. We regularly go out to lunch together. We have a social committee that celebrates people's birthdays and other occasions. I'm a manager, and as a rule of thumb I never turn down a request for PTO.
Sometimes, I wonder how the "you're there to work not to socialize" crowd make it through the day without jumping off the building. We spend a large portion of our day at work. Why be anti-social and miserable? Boggles my mind.
It's not about being anti social. It's about the social butterflies will simply not stop bothering you all day long. Maybe you've never worked in one of those offices, but I have. We're not talking normal interaction, occasional lunch, etc, but non stop chattering about any and every inane topic that crosses their mind. When you have that every day, even what seems like a simple event -- office go out and have lunch together -- becomes a "good God, no, I need a break from all this." I've worked in offices that had great comradery, where we ate lunch together and often went out afterward. And I've worked in offices where the office chatterbox turns on in the morning and doesn't stop. There really is a difference.
I think only about 1/3 of people can "make" it today. The bottom 2/3's are bound to be poor and struggling. The top 1/3, is mostly comprised of the top 20%.
The bottom 13% of the top 1/3 are those people who have pretty good situations, aren't struggling, can afford unexpected expenses, go on vacation, save for retirement but are still not quite affluent.
And the top 20% is the outright affluent. Especially the top half of those, the top 10%.
It's not about being anti social. It's about the social butterflies will simply not stop bothering you all day long. Maybe you've never worked in one of those offices, but I have. We're not talking normal interaction, occasional lunch, etc, but non stop chattering about any and every inane topic that crosses their mind. When you have that every day, even what seems like a simple event -- office go out and have lunch together -- becomes a "good God, no, I need a break from all this." I've worked in offices that had great comradery, where we ate lunch together and often went out afterward. And I've worked in offices where the office chatterbox turns on in the morning and doesn't stop. There really is a difference.
Of course I wasn't talking about the chatterboxes. Trust me, I've been in the corporate world long enough to have encountered every personality out there. And based on my experiences, I simply cannot trust the "you're there to work not to socialize" people. Why? Because part of socializing at work is you voluntarily share info without the other person asking for it. People who think work is only for work in my experience tend to lack the common sense to volunteer info.
As a manager, I constantly have to ask subordinates who are "you're there to work not to socialize" people to get any info out of them. The ones who are sociable always volunteer to me everything I need know without me asking. Just saying. I can give you a dozen examples from the past year where "you're there to work not to socialize" people almost screwed up our project by keeping info to themselves. They are simply not team players.
Of course I wasn't talking about the chatterboxes. Trust me, I've been in the corporate world long enough to have encountered every personality out there. And based on my experiences, I simply cannot trust the "you're there to work not to socialize" people. Why? Because part of socializing at work is you voluntarily share info without the other person asking for it. People who think work is only for work in my experience tend to lack the common sense to volunteer info.
As a manager, I constantly have to ask subordinates who are "you're there to work not to socialize" people to get any info out of them. The ones who are sociable always volunteer to me everything I need know without me asking. Just saying. I can give you a dozen examples from the past year where "you're there to work not to socialize" people almost screwed up our project by keeping info to themselves. They are simply not team players.
My experience has been pretty much the exact opposite. The ones I've found the most trouble getting information from are the socializers. They talk a lot but don't say anything.
Maybe part of this is you and I are making a different distinction about the "socialize" vs "not socialize" groups. Communicating about work isn't socializing, so I don't count that among them. When I'm talking about the "socialize" group, I mean those who spend the day chattering away, wondering from cube to cube interrupting others, first to volunteer to plan a lunch or party, but never seem to get their work done, and, funny thing, when you need someone to plan an official function, like a conference, with working lunch, and so forth, they never volunteer for that. It's always the "non socialize" group who winds up doing the dirty work for the official functions.
It's not about being anti social. It's about the social butterflies will simply not stop bothering you all day long. Maybe you've never worked in one of those offices, but I have. We're not talking normal interaction, occasional lunch, etc, but non stop chattering about any and every inane topic that crosses their mind. When you have that every day, even what seems like a simple event -- office go out and have lunch together -- becomes a "good God, no, I need a break from all this." I've worked in offices that had great comradery, where we ate lunch together and often went out afterward. And I've worked in offices where the office chatterbox turns on in the morning and doesn't stop. There really is a difference.
If the person who is doing all of the chattering is one of those narcissists who gets angry when you don't respond enthusiastically after listening to her ramble all day, watch out....
Location: Huntersville/Charlotte, NC and Washington, DC
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetroWord
Quoted to repost. I think this post deserves special attention.
I work in a company that believes in work hard play hard be friendly to everyone philosophy. We regularly go out to lunch together. We have a social committee that celebrates people's birthdays and other occasions. I'm a manager, and as a rule of thumb I never turn down a request for PTO.
Sometimes, I wonder how the "you're there to work not to socialize" crowd make it through the day without jumping off the building. We spend a large portion of our day at work. Why be anti-social and miserable? Boggles my mind.
I’ll tell you exactly how me as a “you’re there to work” person makes it through the day....actually working. I’ve been noted as the most efficient supervisor on my team because I don’t waste time with small talk.
My job has one of those stupid social committees as well. You know how much celebration I got from them when it was my birthday in June or I just finished my Masters this month. Zero. But they go all out and have damn baby showers every week almost. Yeah, I get babies are worshipped but can the guy who worked for3 years while working 40-50 hours a week get a little love when a baby can be created in one minute of drunk sex?
I’ll tell you exactly how me as a “you’re there to work” person makes it through the day....actually working.
Thank you. I don't owe my coworkers anything, and I'm certainly not volunteering any information that they can "misinterpret" and use against me when they have an axe to grind.
That being said, I've had no problems being sociable in the past. I've always kept in touch with people after I left the workplace, but after getting burned, I'm going to be even more cautious with what I reveal to people I work with (and I wasn't exactly forthcoming in the first place). The only place where I felt pressured to get "personal" with coworkers was the most toxic and abusive place I ever worked. Not a coincidence, and no thanks. Any employer who views my stance negatively is probably one I don't want to work for anyway. Boundaries. Use them.
I think only about 1/3 of people can "make" it today. The bottom 2/3's are bound to be poor and struggling. The top 1/3, is mostly comprised of the top 20%.
Now there's a controversial statement! The top 33% includes the top 20%??? That's fantastic and outrageous! I challenge you to support that claim with evidence and citations!
my wife says I've hated every single job I've ever worked and that it's just a matter of time before I dislike the current job too.
I would hate to say she's right, but I'm getting tired of working.... again.
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