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Old 09-11-2018, 09:39 PM
 
293 posts, read 189,973 times
Reputation: 171

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To preface this, my partner and I are planning on relocating to the east coast in the next month or so (current boss does not know this)

About an hour or so before work ended yesterday, my boss called me into his office.

I get in and he asks me what I see as my future in this company. If it’s short term, or long term and I plan on being here for a while (this completely caught me off-guard, especially since I don’t want my boss finding out about my plans)

Then he goes ‘you have been doing a great job in your position, which is good’ but then the next part was super weird

So there are 3 people that work in my ‘department’ and I’m the newest of the 3.

My boss then goes ‘I’m just trying to plan for the future for my company’ and continues on with ‘I don’t want to hire a 4th person for this position because it’s not necessary, and I don’t really think three people in your team is really necessary, either’

He then goes ‘when Sarah (the most senior member of my team) was out all of last week, it was like a breath of fresh air because there were only 2 of you here’

Then he says ‘I know you’ve had to miss some work for family issues’ (my grandma has been sick and I’m taking off Thursday and Friday this week from work to fly to the east coast for interviews but told my boss I’m caring for my mom after surgery). And then my boss goes ‘it’s a good thing and a bad thing. It’s good because you’re there for your family, but bad because work suffers when you’re gone’

Then he asked me ‘where do you see yourself at this company in the future?’ So still, I’m completely off-guard but definitely didn’t want to tell him about my moving plans, I go ‘barring some crazy circumstances, I’ll be here’

(Long story short, since I've been there since April, there have been a few anti-Semitic comments made to me from co-workers [I am Jewish]) so then I brought that up to him and how there have been a few comments made since I started there and how it’s made me super uncomfortable.

He then goes ‘oh wow I’m sorry that you feel that way. I don’t think they said those things to hurt you, they were probably just kidding around but I can address it to them’..... oh ok, so because they didn’t say it with malicious intent, means that it’s ok...?

But I don’t even know what to think... I’ve never had a boss say I’ve been doing well, but then basically tell me that they don’t think a position in my team (basically my position) is necessary anymore... and then for him to basically dismiss me telling him about the comments made to me just puts a bad taste in my mouth.

Don't know how to feel now. It seems like my boss was basically telling me that my job isn't really needed and was hoping that I would take the cue to just quit

Mod note: A second thread has been merged into this thread. New posts start at #12.

Last edited by PJSaturn; 09-16-2018 at 07:02 PM..
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Old 09-12-2018, 01:45 AM
 
Location: Fuquay Varina
6,428 posts, read 9,767,907 times
Reputation: 18304
If you are planning to leave anyway, why does it even matter?
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Old 09-12-2018, 02:58 AM
 
2,696 posts, read 3,761,374 times
Reputation: 3085
Your boss is sending you mixed signals about your job, maybe wanting to get your reaction. Just play along like you want to be there long-term until you know your other plans to leave are solid.


BTW, did you ever reveal your plans to leave with any other coworkers? Perhaps your boss knows from possible rumors or from some other source?


Off topic, but somewhat pertains to your thread. One thing I learned long ago, never reveal your exit plan when you want to keep your job. You keep that info to yourself until you know for certain. Colleagues gossip.
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Old 09-12-2018, 03:49 AM
 
Location: SW Corner of CT
2,699 posts, read 3,348,746 times
Reputation: 3640
"He then goes ‘when Sarah (the most senior member of my team) was out all of last week, it was like a breath of fresh air because there were only 2 of you here’"
Maybe he's thinking of dropping Sarah, and keeping you on
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Old 09-12-2018, 05:51 AM
 
10,746 posts, read 25,944,054 times
Reputation: 16025
Not really sure what the big deal is..you're leaving in a month, correct? Why don't you just put in your two week notice and be done with it?

He's looking to downsize; he wants you to resign. He doesn't want three employees on your team; he wants two. He wants one gone...........be that third wheel and roll on out of there.
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Old 09-12-2018, 06:31 AM
 
29,473 posts, read 22,487,125 times
Reputation: 48168
Quote:
Originally Posted by SVTLightning View Post
If you are planning to leave anyway, why does it even matter?
I agree, but from the OP's perspective, my thought is that it is always easier mentally when the person quitting does so first, instead of being fired or told to quit by the employer. It is similar to relationships, it's always easier when one breaks off the relationship with another, instead of being blindsided and getting dumped. There's always that bruise to your professional and personal ego.

That is why, even though the OP is already going to move to the east coast anyways, it still stings when you are basically told that you are not a valued employer and basically being asked to resign. It would have been far easier psychologically for the OP to have simply handed in the two week notice without having to go through this meeting.

But anyhow, the writing is on the wall. Even if the OP wasn't moving away, this is a clear notice that the OP did not have much longer at the company. And if I were the OP, I'd definitely look into some sort of action in regards to the anti semitic comments as well as the manager basically saying they were ok.

https://www.eeoc.gov/employees/charge.cfm
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Old 09-12-2018, 07:12 AM
 
12,076 posts, read 23,185,839 times
Reputation: 27198
Quote:
Originally Posted by SVTLightning View Post
If you are planning to leave anyway, why does it even matter?
This. It sounds like even more reason to leave.
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Old 09-12-2018, 07:24 AM
 
293 posts, read 189,973 times
Reputation: 171
Quote:
Originally Posted by maus View Post
Your boss is sending you mixed signals about your job, maybe wanting to get your reaction. Just play along like you want to be there long-term until you know your other plans to leave are solid.


BTW, did you ever reveal your plans to leave with any other coworkers? Perhaps your boss knows from possible rumors or from some other source?


Off topic, but somewhat pertains to your thread. One thing I learned long ago, never reveal your exit plan when you want to keep your job. You keep that info to yourself until you know for certain. Colleagues gossip.

I never told ANYONE in my office about my plans to move, the only people that know are my family and friends (outside of the office). It was just super weird timing to be bringing it up, since I am going to the east coast tonight for interviews
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Old 09-12-2018, 08:37 AM
 
Location: NJ
23,838 posts, read 33,397,843 times
Reputation: 30707
Quote:
Originally Posted by lm0905 View Post
I never told ANYONE in my office about my plans to move, the only people that know are my family and friends (outside of the office). It was just super weird timing to be bringing it up, since I am going to the east coast tonight for interviews
Did you put this job down on your apps? Maybe one of the companies called
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Old 09-13-2018, 06:46 AM
 
10,746 posts, read 25,944,054 times
Reputation: 16025
Quote:
Originally Posted by Roselvr View Post
Did you put this job down on your apps? Maybe one of the companies called
that was my thought as well. We don't always call references after the interview, sometimes we call them before the face to face, but after the phone screen.
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