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Sometimes in life we do things for others that we do not need to do. We can agonize over it, (he should contribute), or we can recognize that we are doing a good deed and just feel good about that.
Yes, "somebody" is 28 years old, I'm guessing "somebody" doesn't have many opportunities for employment, and the husband wanted to help this young man out, with a job, and a "free" ride. We don't know what kind of upbringing "somebody" has received or what "somebodies" home life is like.
My opinion, try to see that you are doing something nice for this young man. Maybe he is "paying" you back with hard work and honesty (yes, I agree, that should be everyone's work ethic). Because of you, he is getting to work on time, hopefully appreciates your generosity, saving money by not using his car (which probably is much older than yours, or in worse shape), and you are ensuring he gets to work in one piece.
Consider this as "paying it forward". Be humble, don't ask him for a few dollars, you never know, one day he may surprise you and "repay" your kindness.
I wonder if OP is bothered by the presence of a 3rd person on the commute? Without Someone there, it would be private husband-wife time -- something that might be in short supply for a small business owner.
Your husband offered Mr. Someone____, (or Mr. ___Someone,) a ride to work with you at no cost.
Because a monetary commitment wasn't agreed to prior to him accepting this arrangement, bite your tongue and enjoy the ride.
I wonder if OP is bothered by the presence of a 3rd person on the commute? Without Someone there, it would be private husband-wife time -- something that might be in short supply for a small business owner.
Of course not. I am very frugal by nature, and I mentioned in another post that our industry isn't high-paying (No, I'm not getting a new job) and I live in an expensive state, so if I can save some money, I will. That's why I posed the question because after awhile, I felt like it was unfair that Someone was getting a free ride while I have to pay 100% of toll and gas. I wanted to get outsiders' perspectives on the situation, and I've read every reply and thank everyone who has replied.
Of course not. I am very frugal by nature, and I mentioned in another post that our industry isn't high-paying (No, I'm not getting a new job) and I live in an expensive state, so if I can save some money, I will. That's why I posed the question because after awhile, I felt like it was unfair that Someone was getting a free ride while I have to pay 100% of toll and gas. I wanted to get outsiders' perspectives on the situation, and I've read every reply and thank everyone who has replied.
Of course not. I am very frugal by nature, and I mentioned in another post that our industry isn't high-paying (No, I'm not getting a new job) and I live in an expensive state, so if I can save some money, I will. That's why I posed the question because after awhile, I felt like it was unfair that Someone was getting a free ride while I have to pay 100% of toll and gas. I wanted to get outsiders' perspectives on the situation, and I've read every reply and thank everyone who has replied.
Then you should be able to appreciate, that by including a 3rd person in the car, you and your husband qualified for "carpool" status on the bridge, thereby halving the cost of the bridge toll.
The *** is up, people; someone on the SF forum, where this topic was cross-posted, solved the mystery. Cars on the Golden Gate Bridge that have 3 people, qualify for a 50% reduction in bridge toll. That extra passenger is, simply by being in the car, covering more than his/her share of the full-fare toll.
The *** is up, people; someone on the SF forum, where this topic was cross-posted, solved the mystery. Cars on the Golden Gate Bridge that have 3 people, qualify for a 50% reduction in bridge toll. That extra passenger is, simply by being in the car, covering more than his/her share of the full-fare toll.
/thread
The poster never said which bridge they're crossing. There are 8 toll bridges in the Bay area. Yes, the Bay Bridge and Golden Gate bridge need 3 people to receive the discount, but some bridges only require 2 people. The OP is probably talking about the Dumbarton Bridge or the San Mateo – Hayward Bridge.
If you were pure co-workers with some kind of ride sharing, I'd say to split all costs, including tolls.
Given your husband is the business's owner and the kid's boss, I'd say asking a young employee to split a $3 toll and pay his boss that difference is somewhat petty, and might do more harm than good.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oldtrader
Your husband offered this when he started work. You have been doing it for as long as the employee has worked for your family. Consider it for what it has always been---A benefit for an employee. Start charging now, and it will not go well with your employee, and his family. Your husband is right, let it go.
Quote:
Originally Posted by 7th generation
Your husband offered Mr. Someone____, (or Mr. ___Someone,) a ride to work with you at no cost.
Because a monetary commitment wasn't agreed to prior to him accepting this arrangement, bite your tongue and enjoy the ride.
I agree with all of these comments. At the same time, I can see being frustrated- especially if money is tight- that you are covering the lion's share of the costs (sounds like employee is covering when he drives the two of you, but that happens much more rarely). Since it was an arrangement in place between a boss and his employee, and has been going on however long it's been going on, and your husband is not of a mind to change it, I think that's it. If he were in line with changing the arrangement and taking turns driving (with 3 of you, you watch get a turn) and/or asking for money, then that could be brought up, with time to make the adjustment. However, it does get a little sketchy because your husband is the boss and this was seen as a perk of the job.
I think you need to leave it and know that your husband made this deal and there's not a lot to change about it.
An added thought- one could argue it's actually saving you some money. On the days that he drives you because your husband is out of town, you are not paying the toll/gas to get to work. So you are saving money on those (granted, only a few) days. You'd be paying anyway on the other days, and he gets to your house, so you are not out of your way at all to drive him.
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