Welcome to City-Data.com Forum!
U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Work and Employment
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 03-20-2019, 02:20 PM
 
780 posts, read 425,052 times
Reputation: 1134

Advertisements

We have a couple in our office described as such. They are deemed unapproachable because they are blunt, lack patience with people (they don't respect), and have a tendency to become elevated/heated when they get excited.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 03-20-2019, 02:33 PM
 
21,884 posts, read 12,936,608 times
Reputation: 36894
Quote:
Originally Posted by aa6660 View Post
Oh, it's definitely not constant teamwork. I'm an introvert and have social anxiety. There is no socializing outside of work or anything. And maybe that balance is what works.
Oh; I thought you said it was teamwork: "In my work, our office is a team. We each are in charge of parts that all interlock and overlap. We hire based upon personalities fitting in with the current team." My mistake!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-20-2019, 05:08 PM
 
Location: Indianapolis, East Side
3,067 posts, read 2,394,719 times
Reputation: 8441
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sir Quotes A Lot View Post
We have a couple in our office described as such. They are deemed unapproachable because they are blunt, lack patience with people (they don't respect), and have a tendency to become elevated/heated when they get excited.
That's unapproachable. I think it's now applied, though, towards anyone who doesn't act like a kindergarten teacher.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-20-2019, 08:08 PM
 
Location: OHIO
2,575 posts, read 2,074,625 times
Reputation: 5966
No, thankfully. I always worry I come off that way as I am on the quiet side and mind my own business. But I am also always eager to help others, so I do not want people thinking they cannot approach me. I somehow found the healthy balance and it works well for me.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-21-2019, 06:54 AM
 
831 posts, read 1,964,116 times
Reputation: 1225
Quote:
Originally Posted by sheerbliss View Post
That's unapproachable. I think it's now applied, though, towards anyone who doesn't act like a kindergarten teacher.

Tried to rep you again SheerBliss

For people who whine that someone else is "unapproachable" - exercise a new theory. Flex that introspective muscle a bit and see why you feel someone has to adjust their behaviors to make *you* feel better.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-21-2019, 08:16 AM
 
5,985 posts, read 2,915,239 times
Reputation: 9026
Quote:
Originally Posted by DorianRo View Post
Yep and there’s plenty of abusive families out there LOL. Everyone is a “family” until a bunch of executives decide they want to jack up stock prices a little and put money in their pockets for a 2nd yacht or 20th car and the layoffs begin
Why would you voluntarily choose to work for a public company if you don't want to work in a place where stock price is the #1 priority? Increasing shareholder value is the only ethical goal for public companies, given stockholders are the owners.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-21-2019, 08:27 AM
 
Location: Louisiana and Pennsylvania
3,010 posts, read 6,304,441 times
Reputation: 3128
Quote:
Originally Posted by tigergirl87 View Post
I typically get this label by co-workers but always get good reviews from supervisors. I come to work a little bit early, maybe by about 5 minutes. Sit down, do my job, speak to my co-workers and engage them but AVOID office politics, gossiping, and other things that bother me. I don't mind talking to anyone in the office but don't divulge my personal life. I pretty much but in my 8 hours and leave. I am not looking for a promotion, but I wonder what makes a person unapproachable in the workplace. In my previous evaluations, my bosses have described me as self motivated and have a quiet confidence. Yes, I am an introvert but I am nice to people just don't engage in non-constructive behavior. I am fairly new to this department and I have a coworker who has been here for 7 yrs. All he does is complain about the other departments short comings which are very evident. I suspect that there are some internal politics at play because this other departments shortcomings have not ever been rectified leading to us having to do more work. Basically I could sit around and complain all day but the boss does not actively try to resolve this so I see this as being non constructive and a huge waste of time.

Has anyone here ever been giving this title?
Nothing wrong with that at all.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-21-2019, 08:37 AM
 
Location: Louisiana and Pennsylvania
3,010 posts, read 6,304,441 times
Reputation: 3128
Quote:
Originally Posted by pretty in black View Post
Or that. Some people really can't grasp the concept of everyone having different personalities. I don't understand why someone being quiet and focusing on their work rubs so many people the wrong way.
True!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-21-2019, 09:06 AM
 
Location: Louisiana and Pennsylvania
3,010 posts, read 6,304,441 times
Reputation: 3128
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thoreau424 View Post
I've never encountered that label used in the workplace, towards me or anyone else.

That's supremely wise and respectable not discussing politics and gossip in the workplace. But...

...not discussing questions relating to personal life is questionable and even odd. Discussing basic personal details is accepted as something to talk about and share. People want to know a little about others, partly to understand the person better, and partly to stimulate conversation (even healthy conversation).

Maybe you've got too far in one direction - avoiding "unnecessary" talk - to avoiding even basic and healthy conversation. It's easy to see how that would be perceived as too clammed up and secretive. [I'm an introvert too, by the way, so I'm not talking as though a social busybody] It's your right and freedom of course to continue as you have, but I'd understand unease on other's part, even to the point of throwing out the "unapproachable" label. It might also come across as a lack of trust; that your coworkers can't even be trusted with such basic information.

Ease up a little with your motivations and goals, and try to see it from their view. Flexibility is important in any workplace. Rigidness tends to stick out and cause issues. I'm sure they already "get it" that you want to limit what you discuss, and have strong feelings there. Now it's time for you to reciprocate and make adjustments on your end. If you fully do that and give it a try, and they still seem unreasonable, then you'll know it's really them and not partly you.
I respect your opinion but speaking only for me, there are certain questions relating to one's personal life that are simply off limits and that grown adults should not be asking other grownups, breaching or discussing i.e. finances, marital status, sex life, children, medical, inheritance and other personal issues. Yes, there are a couple of people at my workplace who talk about these things and then expect others to join in. No thanks.

You see, when one "soft" or surface question is asked, then it evolves into a slippery slope of other gradual "hard" and deeper questions and sensitive topics being breached and down the rabbit hole it goes. Unfortunately many people cannot distinguish between basic and healthy conversation and what is off limits and inappropriate.

Now I enjoy talking about sports, movies and other aspects of pop culture when at lunch and or break. As for the rest mentioned above, i'll pass.

Last edited by Gil3; 03-21-2019 at 09:54 AM..
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-21-2019, 09:12 AM
Bo Bo won $500 in our forum's Most Engaging Poster Contest - Tenth Edition (Apr-May 2014). 

Over $104,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum and additional contests are planned
 
Location: Ohio
17,107 posts, read 38,096,265 times
Reputation: 14447
A coworker I had who comes to mind as "unapproachable" is my department head's admin at a previous job. She was definitely an introvert, and unlike everyone else on the team with a private office, she kept her office door closed all the time. To me, that was a clear signal that she did not want to be approached.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:


Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Work and Employment

All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:29 PM.

© 2005-2024, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Contact Us - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37 - Top