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Old 03-22-2019, 10:25 AM
Location: colorado springs, CO
4,965 posts, read 2,286,772 times
Reputation: 16666


Originally Posted by RunD1987 View Post
Hi, asking for my wife.

My wife is 3 months pregnant and the babies due date is October.

Even before having a baby my wife has been searching for a new job with better hours.

Out of the blue a place contacted my wife was interviewed and was offered her a conditional job offer.

Now she mention being pregnant but did not tell them the due date.

Only reluctance we are having in taking the job is a few thing's. If her pregnancy has any complications down the road might have to take time off from work. We are not sure FLMA policy can she be eligible if only working at this job for 4 to 5 months.

When she goes on maternity leave could she have her position again with same hours.

Anyone been in a situation as such or offer up insight that might help with the decision. Thanks!
Been there & done that, even had to take a computerized lift test ... My situation was 24 years ago, dire & your wife has, well; she has YOU so she shouldn't have to go through what I did. Honestly; this might not be the right time for this.

I have strong feelings about these situations; went from being a young woman with old-school feminist ideals to being an anti-all feminist agenda; "give me an apron, high-heels & the 1950s, please." To me, old-school feminism meant my pregnancies were my responsibility & I didn't deserve anything above a bare-bones, 6 weeks, un-paid maternity leave. No accommodations. If I couldn't work hard & keep up, then I was a liability to the company & I should go home & stay there until I could. This experience was to be the first of several reasons why I changed my mind.

The long story short; My little girl had just passed away. I came back from bereavement leave to find the company had undergone a corporate takeover (their 3rd in two years) & that all units had been "restructured". Without me (& about 3 others who were mid-level management).

My daughter's father was unraveling at the seams from her traumatic death; he was using drugs & drifted away. I don't remember caring much at that time. So about 3 weeks after losing her & 1 week after losing my job; we got in a big fight, he bonked me in the head & I kicked him out, had to go to the ER & that's when I found out I was pregnant. Since I was unemployed, I qualified for Medicaid for prenatal care.

I am highly employable in a very "portable" field (medical) but the pre-employment phase takes about two months to complete & I was already 3 months along. I was interviewed & offered a position within my first two weeks of looking. I accepted & did not tell them I was pregnant, a lift test was scheduled for a week & a half away & I passed; was put on the schedule to start in 2 weeks but I was now 4 months along. And out of money. Came home to an eviction notice on my door & packed up everything to move into a "home for unwed mothers" (shelter for pregnant women).

So, I started my new job 3 months after losing my daughter, 2 & a half months after losing my job, 2 weeks after losing my home, living in a shelter & 4 & a half months pregnant.

And my new employer knew none of this. I'm tall & hid my bump well. I didn't complain about my 12-hour shifts & I didn't say a word when they put me on rotating night/day shifts. I never called off, not once.

They finally figured out I was pregnant when I was 7 & a half months along. I told them I would not claim my health benefits until after the baby was born & I didn't qualify for Medicaid anymore & that I would not require a maternity leave but might use a few sick days instead. So they kept me & I kept my word.

I moved out of the shelter at 8 & a half months along, worked until my water broke on my day off & was back at work 4 days later (wouldn't recommend that). Luckily, my mom was able to take care of the baby until he was old enough for daycare. I stayed at that job for another two years. Neither my employer nor co-workers ever learned about my daughter; I kept my business to myself because I didn't want them to think I was vulnerable.

I now believe all women have the right to be as vulnerable as they need to be, especially when they are pregnant but I still believe that pregnancy is a couple's responsibility; not a society's or an industry's.

Your wife will not qualify for FMLA & should be on your health insurance anyway (?). Is incredibly lucky to have been offered maternity leave during an interview (?) & I'm amazed she told them she was pregnant!
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Old 03-22-2019, 11:22 AM
10,063 posts, read 4,668,516 times
Reputation: 15307
take the new job, it sounds better

so what about the pregnancy? she can build a lot of goodwill at the new place in the time before the pregnancy, she can be trained and ready to go afterwards too

how come people think FLMA is sliced cheese? even without it, you people act like employers don't understand how pregnancy works. They will work with her to get past it if they want to keep her, FLMA or not.

half the people on CD seems to think employers are abusive and slave drivers, HA, most employers are decent and work with employees because it helps them too.
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