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Old 03-21-2019, 09:23 PM
 
3,771 posts, read 5,472,107 times
Reputation: 2990

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I posted before about a job I recently started. I have been cc'd on various emails. I noticed that when anyone asks a question to this supervisor (I'm not sure if that he's a supervisor, but he is below the manager), he comes back with an abrasive response. It seems like people are asking legitimate questions, in response to instructions or changes emailed to entire departments.


I know people outside of work like this. I avoid them like the plague. But have never dealt with people like this in a managerial type position. I have assessed already that it will be like walking on eggshells to deal with him. People seem to be wording the emails in a very nice apologetic way. But get abrasive responses. I find this uncomfortable.



I don't know exactly the question. Just wondering what others have done with people like this.

 
Old 03-21-2019, 10:31 PM
 
2,060 posts, read 597,123 times
Reputation: 2905
Try and work around him as much as possible.

If someone insists on you having to work directly with him seek new employment. They always keep *****holes around like him for whatever reason.
 
Old 03-22-2019, 12:11 AM
 
17,258 posts, read 10,188,976 times
Reputation: 28783
How to Deal With an Abrasive Boss

Dealing with abrasive personalities


Dealing with abrasive managers


Quote:
Here's the key, and it may be a surprise: abrasive bosses seek, above all, to be perceived as competent. When they think subordinates are performing below par - correctly or otherwise - they experience this as a threat to their competence, which requires top performance from the entire unit. In the face of this threat to their very survival - for they see their career as dependent on being competent - they will act against those letting down the team.

This is the hard part to grasp: when bosses are abusive, over-controlling and undermining, it might seem personal to you but to the abrasive boss it's all about their own survival, which depends on their perceptions of competence
.
 
Old 03-22-2019, 12:59 AM
 
3,771 posts, read 5,472,107 times
Reputation: 2990

mmmkay. So people are as...holes for their on benefit. I think everyone knows that. This just says they are ass-holes because they must look good and can't find a productive way of doing that.
 
Old 03-22-2019, 06:39 PM
 
Location: on the wind
7,101 posts, read 2,916,317 times
Reputation: 24039
Quote:
Originally Posted by FelixTheCat View Post
I posted before about a job I recently started. I have been cc'd on various emails. I noticed that when anyone asks a question to this supervisor (I'm not sure if that he's a supervisor, but he is below the manager), he comes back with an abrasive response. It seems like people are asking legitimate questions, in response to instructions or changes emailed to entire departments.


I know people outside of work like this. I avoid them like the plague. But have never dealt with people like this in a managerial type position. I have assessed already that it will be like walking on eggshells to deal with him. People seem to be wording the emails in a very nice apologetic way. But get abrasive responses. I find this uncomfortable.

I don't know exactly the question. Just wondering what others have done with people like this.
Many times having to work for/with someone unpleasant teaches you more than not having to. Learn how NOT to treat others. No matter what line of work you're in you are going to meet these types. You'll be a lot better off if you learn how to deal with them sooner than later. Also remember that email communication can be misinterpreted because there is no "tone" to it. If this supervisor was responding in person you might get a whole different impression from the same answer. FWIW, you did say you've only been working there a short time? There may be backstory you aren't aware of yet.
 
Old 03-22-2019, 07:19 PM
 
3,294 posts, read 1,561,140 times
Reputation: 3602
Small red snapper,rolled up in a tube sock,stuffed in a planter or desk drawer.
Send a message,and start documenting the behaviour to HR. Some people are born below hards ,and cant seem to use some happiness.
 
Old 03-22-2019, 08:15 PM
 
3,771 posts, read 5,472,107 times
Reputation: 2990
Quote:
Originally Posted by Parnassia View Post
Many times having to work for/with someone unpleasant teaches you more than not having to. Learn how NOT to treat others. No matter what line of work you're in you are going to meet these types. You'll be a lot better off if you learn how to deal with them sooner than later. Also remember that email communication can be misinterpreted because there is no "tone" to it. If this supervisor was responding in person you might get a whole different impression from the same answer. FWIW, you did say you've only been working there a short time? There may be backstory you aren't aware of yet.

Yeah it's true it would be good if I can learn to deal with difficult people. I just don't have it in me. I'm straightforward and fair. The majority of people out there appreciate that and are the same. I'm pretty sure I don't have the capacity to deal with people who are just jerks. I try, but I don't get anywhere. If it was a matter of just being offended, I can deal with that. But problems, just don't get solved. I can just leave the business and be in a nicer environment. Nothing is worth dealing with that.
 
Old 03-22-2019, 08:18 PM
 
3,771 posts, read 5,472,107 times
Reputation: 2990
Quote:
Originally Posted by kapikap View Post
Small red snapper,rolled up in a tube sock,stuffed in a planter or desk drawer.
Send a message,and start documenting the behaviour to HR. Some people are born below hards ,and cant seem to use some happiness.



Funny, I'm out the door. But I will need to come in tomorrow to give reports. I should find something gross to put near his desk..lol. They have cameras everywhere. But at this point, what will they do about it.
 
Old 03-23-2019, 09:05 AM
 
Location: NW Indiana
40,206 posts, read 15,179,596 times
Reputation: 102193
Duplicate topic. Thread closed.
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