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Old 03-31-2019, 03:02 AM
 
Location: Empire State of Philly
1,746 posts, read 1,286,543 times
Reputation: 2986

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Quote:
Originally Posted by rummage View Post
Don't overstate your importance to yourself when leaving. Companies are use to losing employees, clients, market share, money, etc. They get over it very quickly. While you might be a top performer, that doesn't mean the company considered your contributions highly valuable. Only they know what their top concerns of the day are, and they could have very little to do with you.
I never said my contributions were highly valuable, but at the end of the day, my work brought them revenue and business. This is not something to be disregarded when you work in the financial industry.

As far as them getting over it so quickly .. before I came into my current position was vacant for more than a year. They had a huge turnover because people would come in for 3-6 months and leave due to the high pressure and lack of training. Besides, I speak the three languages required for this job which is not that easy to find in an English speaking country.

I'm not bragging, I'm looking at the facts. When I started, I had to pick up a lot of slack because the position was vacant for a long time. Thus, I know finding a replacement will not be that easy, especially given the language skills required.

However, that is not my problem.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:04 AM
 
Location: Empire State of Philly
1,746 posts, read 1,286,543 times
Reputation: 2986
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rubydoodoo View Post
Wow, I could have almost written your post! Many similarities. Iím was the only one my team for a long time, every one of my co-workers left due to the manager. Almost 13 people in less than 4 years. They all offered similar feedback about this mgr in their exit interviews that but......this mgr and this mgrs supervisor make up excuses as to why these people left to the even higher mgmt. They donít tell the truth why they left to upper mgmt. Rather, they say the employee wasnít a good fit or was negative itís good they are gone. The mgr and the mgrs supervisor make excuses for poor management probably because this mgrs been with the company decades and they both have ďeasy streetĒ jobs, making six figures and never bringing in a dime for the company. While the company pays all their expenses. They honestly do nothing.

Anyway, if you know you are never going back I think you should state your peace. Keep it business, not personal. They may listen, they may not. Generally, management protects its own. I mean, if 13 people in less than 4 years doesnít get yiu looked at, demoted or fired, nothing will.
Wow, yeah, it's exactly what I am encountering. The management will indeed always find an excuse to blame the former employee.

13 is nothing compared to the amount our department lost ..

When I started, we were about 30 analysts (back in 2016). Now that I'm leaving, they only have 4 left.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:10 AM
 
1,592 posts, read 413,500 times
Reputation: 2940
Quote:
Originally Posted by LostinPhilly View Post
I never said my contributions were highly valuable, but at the end of the day, my work brought them revenue and business. This is not something to be disregarded when you work in the financial industry.
Apparently in that company it wasn't, because they let you walk out the door without a huge counter-offer to stay. So there is something wrong with the management there. Be glad you left them.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:11 AM
 
1,592 posts, read 413,500 times
Reputation: 2940
Quote:
Originally Posted by LostinPhilly View Post
Wow, yeah, it's exactly what I am encountering. The management will indeed always find an excuse to blame the former employee.

13 is nothing compared to the amount our department lost ..

When I started, we were about 30 analysts (back in 2016). Now that I'm leaving, they only have 4 left.
Another reason to be glad you are out of there. Focus on the new job, don't worry about the old company. At this rate, it might not even be there for much longer.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:14 AM
 
7,016 posts, read 3,899,663 times
Reputation: 14961
Every little thing you complain about in this long OP is just that, little. You're at work to perform a function, not be anyone's favorite anything. According to you, you've done your job well - leave it at that, anything else you mentioned is just petty. And don't base anything you ever do careerwise by thoughts that you'll never need to deal with any of the people at your current job again; for all you know the next company you work for could merge with the one you're leaving next week.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:16 AM
 
Location: Empire State of Philly
1,746 posts, read 1,286,543 times
Reputation: 2986
Basically, I spoke about the situation to a couple of people.

The managers that are supportive of me and way above her, advised that I schedule a meeting with her & her own manager to tell them my truth.

My friends advised that I discuss with HR in a black & white manner, leaving the emotional piece aside and putting the facts on the table.

Now, I am sorry, but she calls herself a "feminist" yet needs to dim other women's shine to feel good about herself. This is not being a feminist, this is being petty.

In all fairness, when I gave my resignation, I did thank her for her for everything she's done and yadi yada, but 5 minutes later her passive-aggressiveness came through again. I mean, I know she doesn't like me yet even on my way out, she's still trying to bring me down. This is pure pettiness. There was no "I'm sad to see you're leaving ..." nothing. It was straight to the comments I indicated in my OP above.

Normally, when your employee resigns, you play it politically correct regardless of whether you liked them or not. You thank them for their work and say you're said to see them leave. Not her. I gave her what she wanted, which is my resignation and she's still taking the chance to put me down.

She has severe insecurities I believe. After all, she told me in January her job for the year was to "learn to love herself". It says a lot.

Everybody above her told me I've done a fantastic job and my resignation is the worst news of the year, yet she on the other hand has no shame.

I'm telling you, once I'm out, I'm never looking back. There's plenty of other companies out there and I have connections elsewhere within this company to come back into an different office should I want to.


As far as me having lost self-respect because I was "bullied". It's not as simple. When you work in a company, you have to be incredibly careful before bringing this word into the mix. This may create severe issues and you can't go around saying someone is bullying you as there are real accusations. Now, the way the went on about it was subtle, so that they wouldn't cross the line, but it was indeed bullying.

Regardless, the managers above her that are supportive know about the situation. They experienced the toxicity first hand, so I'm guessing I won't need to draw a picture.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:19 AM
 
Location: Empire State of Philly
1,746 posts, read 1,286,543 times
Reputation: 2986
Quote:
Originally Posted by rummage View Post
Apparently in that company it wasn't, because they let you walk out the door without a huge counter-offer to stay. So there is something wrong with the management there. Be glad you left them.
I agree.

Everyone was asking me whether I had a counter-offer and I said no. People were shocked.

On the contrary, my manager said my place is not at this company when I resigned.

Thus, she opened the actual door for me to leave.

Ultimately, when you have an employee who gets appraisals from big clients, senior management etc ... on their way out and you can't be bothered to counter-offer, it just means you want that employee out for whatever reason.

I don't regret my choice, it just proved my very point that something is clearly wrong.
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Old 03-31-2019, 03:21 AM
 
Location: Empire State of Philly
1,746 posts, read 1,286,543 times
Reputation: 2986
Quote:
Originally Posted by kokonutty View Post
Every little thing you complain about in this long OP is just that, little. You're at work to perform a function, not be anyone's favorite anything. According to you, you've done your job well - leave it at that, anything else you mentioned is just petty. And don't base anything you ever do careerwise by thoughts that you'll never need to deal with any of the people at your current job again; for all you know the next company you work for could merge with the one you're leaving next week.
A merger between the two is highly unlikely.

I work in investment banking & I'm going into a Big 4 accounting/consulting. Highly doubt these two would ever merge.

The prospective company is not going down the drain like this bank.
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Old 03-31-2019, 06:50 AM
 
Location: Proxima Centauri
4,852 posts, read 2,006,187 times
Reputation: 5329
Quote:
Originally Posted by LostinPhilly View Post
Hi all,

I've been at my job for about 3 years now. I decided to resign on Thursday to move to another company, hopefully with a healthier environment.

Our department has a huge turnover with approximately 1 to 2 resignations per month. This has led to having some team leads end up with no reports at all. Consequently, there are more team leaders & manager than actual analysts.

About 7 months after I started my job, my current manager got appointed. She's around my age and clearly has some confidence issues with she transfers onto me. She's never liked me from the moment she saw me even she she was not yet a manager. I remember once going up to her to tell her someone had called and wanted to speak to her, she didn't even want to look at me and kept looking at her screen, no thank you nothing.

You can imagine my shock when she became a manager, my manager. On top of this, I don't have a team, I'm the only one covering my desk/market. From that point onwards, it was belittling after belittling moments. She would ignore our 1-1 and whenever we'd have one, she would focus on the following:

- I should change departments because I'm supposedly meant for bigger things.

Mind you, I'm a top performer. I've received countless positive feedbacks from senior management on various operations I conducted across different jurisdictions.

- She cannot promote me because I'm not a social butterfly. I need to socialize more otherwise my manager won't be able to approve my promotion. Yet, I was still getting positive reviews from senior management.

- When the head of our department overseas granted me the opportunity to work on their biggest clients, she decided to make me work on a completely different market on my own (which I never cover) which requires approximately 2 employees to cover properly. When I brought it up to the head of the department saying that my work on top of this project on top of me covering for a market I'm not even assigned to is not realistic, my direct manager said I'm lying and I don't have any work to do.

This is absolutely not true as the head of the department overseas has a direct visibility on my workload and thus knew I'd screw up my own market & this big project if I were to take on a different market in addition which I was never assigned to in the first place. My manager wanted to basically make me work on an additional market without the consent of the head of the department I work with and later on called me "unprofessional" for bringing the issue to the head's awareness.

- After the last teammate I was close with left, she decided to completely ignore me for weeks on end. She would talk to other people and not me even though we didn't have any argument or anything. She blatantly ignored me, so that I would feel isolated.

- When I submitted my resignation, her response was: "This is happening. Wow. Well, this company is not your place. You're meant for bigger things and you may want to come back at some stage, but I suggest you do not".

- She said that if she didn't walk past my desk, she wouldn't know I exist (it's a blatant lie, she gets feedback emails from senior management about me on a monthly basis because of how great I was doing my job and she said I don't exist?).

When I announced my departure to the higher management abroad (above her), several of them jump on the occasion to write me a recommendations/reference etc ... All of them said I did a fantastic job and are really shocked I'm leaving. However, since I don't report to them, they can't offer anything especially as the company is going under restructuring. These are the people who wrote countless of emails to my direct manager to praise my work and she never bat an eyelash.

One time, I received a kuddos from the EMEA head and she ignored the email for an entire week. Everyone had responded by saying they agreed with him on the fact that I did an amazing job, except her. She responded a week later pretending she hadn't seen it when it's a lie. She reads all of her emails, especially from the EMEA head. She always responds to emails in 2 minutes and of course, when it was time to praise me, she ignored.

Anyway, you get the point. I feel like throwing her under the bus on my way out as there's no way I'm ever coming back to a department that has gone down the drain.

Do you reckon I should advise HR of her ways in a diplomatic manner? Or should I address those with her?

First of all any attacks on your current boss will be frowned upon. Remember that she was promoted, you weren't. Attacks on her are attacks on their decision. There may be a conversation in years to come where the other guy will say "I know that company, who did you work for there?". If you trashed her, you will have reason to be concerned.

Your primary task now is to secure the references that you've worked so hard to get, and keep a paper copy of any "kuddos" that were given to you over the past three years. I would do that soon because your email permissions could be revoked at any time. In your exit interview, I would focus on what your rehire code will be.

You mentioned high turnover. I think that personnel already knows what kind of atmosphere you work in. It sounds like you gave a copy of your resignation to HR. If I'm wrong then do it after you've made copies of important emails.

In the future, you should try to stay at any job for at least five years for a pension. You may not think that it's important now but you will when you are sixty.

Last edited by Tonyafd; 03-31-2019 at 07:13 AM..
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Old 03-31-2019, 07:34 AM
 
Location: Proxima Centauri
4,852 posts, read 2,006,187 times
Reputation: 5329
Quote:
Originally Posted by LostinPhilly View Post
Wow, yeah, it's exactly what I am encountering. The management will indeed always find an excuse to blame the former employee.

13 is nothing compared to the amount our department lost ..

When I started, we were about 30 analysts (back in 2016). Now that I'm leaving, they only have 4 left.

Now that I see your additional posts, I think that they are positioning themselves for a recession.
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