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Old 04-02-2019, 12:24 PM
 
4,046 posts, read 5,336,983 times
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In the last couple of years at my job, three employees have threatened to quit if they didn't get their way. In two cases, they were arguing that they should not have to work with a coworker they disliked, and said they would quit if they had to work with the person. In the third case, the employee threatened to quit if one of the first two quit.

Is this a common occurrence in the workplace? I find their tactics to be immature. My perspective is that if you dislike a coworker and prefer not to work with the person, you have to either suck it up and deal with it (you probably won't like everyone at work) or work with your supervisor to find another solution (maybe a mediated meeting with the coworker to discuss the issues), not threaten to quit. And to me it goes without saying that, "If she quits, I quit," is a tactic that makes you look bad.

To be clear, I'm not the boss, so I'm not the one fielding the complaints.
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Old 04-02-2019, 12:27 PM
 
Location: Greensboro, NC
636 posts, read 238,381 times
Reputation: 1532
Extremely immature, especially if the motive is "I don't like this co-worker!"

What field is this in?
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Old 04-02-2019, 12:29 PM
 
4,046 posts, read 5,336,983 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BrianGC View Post
Extremely immature, especially if the motive is "I don't like this co-worker!"

What field is this in?
It's a public library.
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Old 04-02-2019, 01:03 PM
 
Location: Greensboro, NC
636 posts, read 238,381 times
Reputation: 1532
I've had to work with plenty of people I don't like over the years. Just have to suck it up and deal, realize that I'm there to do my job, not make friends.

Sounds like your co-workers have a lot of growing up to do.
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Old 04-02-2019, 01:07 PM
 
Location: Mars City
5,091 posts, read 2,138,052 times
Reputation: 7505
Getting change through threatening to quit is sad and childish. No advice here will correct what appears to be a poor and failing environment. I'd move on to a better and healthier possibilties.
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Old 04-02-2019, 01:17 PM
 
11,121 posts, read 8,527,266 times
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Let them quit. Not a fan of threats or ultimatums.

Last edited by charlygal; 04-02-2019 at 02:02 PM..
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Old 04-02-2019, 01:18 PM
 
17,252 posts, read 10,176,823 times
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The only thing I've come across that is somewhat similar are those that have threatened (in a mild way) that they'd leave if they didn't get a promotion. Some did get promoted, while others didn't and eventually quit.
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Old 04-02-2019, 02:09 PM
 
4,046 posts, read 5,336,983 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by charlygal View Post
Let them quit. Not a fan of threats or ultimatums.
Unless I really valued the worker and was determined to make them happy enough to want to stay, I think that would be my reaction if it were up to me.

Thanks for the responses. It sounds like this isn't common or normal, which is a bit of a relief. Though I'm happy not to be personally involved in the drama, I'm still not a fan of having it going on around me.
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Old 04-02-2019, 02:12 PM
 
1,673 posts, read 548,866 times
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Threats are empty, and threatening to quit over not working with a co-worker is childish.

The only thing that makes sense is if you don't get a raise/promotion/etc., get a job offer from another company. State that you will take that offer if the new position and/or salary isn't matched.
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Old 04-02-2019, 02:32 PM
 
Location: Over yonder a piece
3,910 posts, read 4,644,145 times
Reputation: 6247
Quote:
Originally Posted by buildings_and_bridges View Post
In the last couple of years at my job, three employees have threatened to quit if they didn't get their way. In two cases, they were arguing that they should not have to work with a coworker they disliked, and said they would quit if they had to work with the person. In the third case, the employee threatened to quit if one of the first two quit.

Is this a common occurrence in the workplace? I find their tactics to be immature. My perspective is that if you dislike a coworker and prefer not to work with the person, you have to either suck it up and deal with it (you probably won't like everyone at work) or work with your supervisor to find another solution (maybe a mediated meeting with the coworker to discuss the issues), not threaten to quit. And to me it goes without saying that, "If she quits, I quit," is a tactic that makes you look bad.

To be clear, I'm not the boss, so I'm not the one fielding the complaints.
Many years ago I worked for a firm at which one long-term admin did NO WORK WHATSOEVER while the remaining four (including me) worked extremely hard at not only our own jobs but also picked up the useless admin's slack and did her job most of the time as well. We eventually became so fed up that we had a meeting amongst ourselves and realized we were willing to quit if the company did not do something about it.

We walked AS A GROUP into our leader's office, explained why we were there, outlined many specific instances where the useless admin was incompetent and/or giving us her work in order to avoid doing it herself. We then told him that we were willing to walk - immediately - unless something tangible and permanent be done. We did not ask him to fire her outright, but we made it clear that we would no longer do her job for her.

We then left his office, went back to our offices, and continued working.

The leader called an emergency meeting with the other leaders, and by the end of the day, useless admin was packing up her personals.

We absolutely did the right thing that day, and there were no regrets. The woman had been abusing her longevity for far too long and we were simply not willing to go along with it any more.

Would we have quit if they didn't let her go? I'm convinced that had the company not taken a REAL tangible step toward fixing the problem, yes we would have quit.

I'm quite convinced that the leader knew how bad she was, but figured he wouldn't do anything if no one cared. Once we let the leaders know that we DID care, they took care of it and let her go - immediately.

The difference in our situation?
* We had data and evidence to back up our accusations, not just gossipy complaints
* We stated our information in a mature way - not with threats but with genuine frustration and weariness
* We let them know that we were so unhappy by the inequity that we were willing to walk away - we just wanted equity in the workplace for all admins
* It was ALL of us explaining a shared experience with useless admin

ETA - one of those admins STILL works for this company (she's been there over 25 years at this point) and is highly regarded for her professionalism and quality of work. The other two have long since married, had kids and moved to new cities. I worked there another 3-4 years after useless admin left, and then left for a job that cut my commute in half so I could be closer to my own kids. When I left, they told me I was always welcome to come back if I decided I wanted to return.
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