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Old 04-29-2019, 11:11 PM
 
40 posts, read 8,264 times
Reputation: 67

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Quote:
Originally Posted by BrianGC View Post
Eh, wouldn't aspiring managers want to be "liked" to have a better chance?
As a manager in my 30s, I have to say only partially true. In fact, wanting to be "liked" is the reason so many people couldn't be a manager in the first place. The higher you go, the more likely you will encounter situations where some people will always hate you no matter what. You have a live with that.
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Old 04-30-2019, 12:08 AM
 
Location: Outside US
1,218 posts, read 483,073 times
Reputation: 1594
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post
I started a job in January with a good salary and location. I like it. I work basically on a team of 2 and a boss above that. As far as I know, Iím doing a good job in their eyes.

Itís the others that seem to be the problem. My thing is to keep my head low, be nice and respectful, and do the best job I can. Just stay off the radar.

Other employees were nice to me at first, and I saw their interactions. Then I was involved in conversations where they bad mouth each other, but are nice to their face. Right then and there I wanted to be off the radar, but now Iím being talked about.
I can't stand these types of co-workers and people - but we have to be around them sometimes. And during certain periods of our work lives - we have to be around them a lot.

Quote:
I heard one of the girls talking to someone, and I heard my name when I walked by. I donít know if it was good or bad, but I definitely heard my name.

I donít work with this girl. I donít really have any interaction with her.
Well, you have no idea if it was simple chatter or not.


Quote:
Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
Care what they think? No, not at all.

Care what they say? If negative or slandering, yes.
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Old 04-30-2019, 12:55 AM
 
Location: on the wind
7,157 posts, read 2,942,978 times
Reputation: 24224
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mephariel View Post
As a manager in my 30s, I have to say only partially true. In fact, wanting to be "liked" is the reason so many people couldn't be a manager in the first place. The higher you go, the more likely you will encounter situations where some people will always hate you no matter what. You have a live with that.
I'd suggest that "liked" isn't the best goal for someone with managerial aspirations. Respected may fit better. If someone doesn't respect you they won't care if they make your life miserable or not. You don't "matter" to them whether they like you or not. Someone may change their mind about "like" or "dislike" at the drop of a hat; its more emotionally based and reality is you probably won't be liked by everyone. Respect isn't as volatile; takes a while to earn and a while to lose and even folks who decide they don't like you can still grudgingly be respectful.

As for caring what coworkers think, as others have said it depends on who they are. If they are people I have to cooperate with, people I have to work for, or people who work for me, yes, what they think about me has to matter. I want to be productive and not be miserable while spending 40 waking hours a week around them. I'm no social gadfly but having a reputation for honesty, fairness, and civility makes everyone's workplace life easier. What goes around comes around.
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Old 04-30-2019, 07:08 AM
 
Location: Tennessee
23,601 posts, read 17,589,896 times
Reputation: 27682
To a point.

I don't personally dislike anyone I work with. I want them to trust me and have confidence in me. I don't intentionally rub people the wrong way.

With that said, I'm not going to go way out of my way for most of them. It's a casual relationship at best.
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Old 04-30-2019, 07:11 AM
 
Location: Copenhagen, Denmark
10,522 posts, read 8,770,706 times
Reputation: 12215
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post

Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
Yes, the one's I respect.
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Old 04-30-2019, 09:02 AM
 
4,051 posts, read 2,623,940 times
Reputation: 8782
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lekrii View Post
Professionally speaking, it's important some people respect me. On a personal level, it's advantageous for people to like you.

I won't bend over backwards to be friends, but any job will be more difficult than it needs to be if co-workers don't know and respect you to a degree. Trying to get anything done without having the respect of colleagues is always difficult, regardless of how smart or skilled you are.
Agree. I think people tend to underplay the importance of soft skills. Generally, unless you're a superstar subject-matter expert in a field where experts are rare, then soft skills count. If you make a mistake, and everyone will make a mistake at some point, you're more likely to get cut some slack if you're social and well liked. If there are layoffs, assuming both people are competent, they'll probably keep the person who is a better team player.

You don't have to be best friends with your co-workers or divulge every detail of your personal life but being personable is advantages in most jobs especially if you have management aspirations. All the top-level managers I have encountered have excellent social skills, especially those who were CEOs at Fortune 500 companies.
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Old 04-30-2019, 09:45 AM
 
2,658 posts, read 1,553,315 times
Reputation: 3207
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lekrii View Post
Professionally speaking, it's important some people respect me. On a personal level, it's advantageous for people to like you.

I won't bend over backwards to be friends, but any job will be more difficult than it needs to be if co-workers don't know and respect you to a degree. Trying to get anything done without having the respect of colleagues is always difficult, regardless of how smart or skilled you are.
This sums it up. I try to be nice and friendly but most of all I want to be respected by my coworkers. Respect is earned and being friendly helps but you donít have to be friend to respect the other person and vice versa. Work is far more pleasant when you like your coworkers though!
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Old 04-30-2019, 11:32 AM
 
Location: In a vehicle.
5,034 posts, read 3,220,815 times
Reputation: 8217
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post
I started a job in January with a good salary and location. I like it. I work basically on a team of 2 and a boss above that. As far as I know, I’m doing a good job in their eyes.

It’s the others that seem to be the problem. My thing is to keep my head low, be nice and respectful, and do the best job I can. Just stay off the radar.

Other employees were nice to me at first, and I saw their interactions. Then I was involved in conversations where they bad mouth each other, but are nice to their face. Right then and there I wanted to be off the radar, but now I’m being talked about.

I heard one of the girls talking to someone, and I heard my name when I walked by. I don’t know if it was good or bad, but I definitely heard my name.

I don’t work with this girl. I don’t really have any interaction with her.

Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
No. I only ask they think of me when they want to take vacations.....They do that pretty often. Have another week long coverage coming in May. Sure helps with the bills.
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Old 04-30-2019, 02:56 PM
 
727 posts, read 131,996 times
Reputation: 438
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post
I started a job in January with a good salary and location. I like it. I work basically on a team of 2 and a boss above that. As far as I know, Iím doing a good job in their eyes.

Itís the others that seem to be the problem. My thing is to keep my head low, be nice and respectful, and do the best job I can. Just stay off the radar.

Other employees were nice to me at first, and I saw their interactions. Then I was involved in conversations where they bad mouth each other, but are nice to their face. Right then and there I wanted to be off the radar, but now Iím being talked about.

I heard one of the girls talking to someone, and I heard my name when I walked by. I donít know if it was good or bad, but I definitely heard my name.

I donít work with this girl. I donít really have any interaction with her.

Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
In all likelihood she wants to sleep with you. I am not kidding.
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Old 05-06-2019, 07:52 AM
 
Location: Cowlitz County, WA
285 posts, read 320,977 times
Reputation: 211
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post
Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
I'm currently unemployed but, I never really cared what my coworkers think of me when I was working. I was there to do a job. Making friends at work was like icing on cake for me. It was good but, I didn't necessary needed to make friends at work. I have plenty outside of work.
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