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Old 04-29-2019, 10:01 AM
 
41 posts, read 11,733 times
Reputation: 15

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I started a job in January with a good salary and location. I like it. I work basically on a team of 2 and a boss above that. As far as I know, Iím doing a good job in their eyes.

Itís the others that seem to be the problem. My thing is to keep my head low, be nice and respectful, and do the best job I can. Just stay off the radar.

Other employees were nice to me at first, and I saw their interactions. Then I was involved in conversations where they bad mouth each other, but are nice to their face. Right then and there I wanted to be off the radar, but now Iím being talked about.

I heard one of the girls talking to someone, and I heard my name when I walked by. I donít know if it was good or bad, but I definitely heard my name.

I donít work with this girl. I donít really have any interaction with her.

Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
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Old 04-29-2019, 10:12 AM
 
6,839 posts, read 3,710,891 times
Reputation: 18078
It really depends on how much I respect their opinion in general. There are some folk who I trust and I care what they think because they are knowledgeable and honorable. I can trust what they have to say. Others just gossip without knowledge and I can't trust what they say. If I cant trust them, why would I care what they think?
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Old 04-29-2019, 10:14 AM
 
2,410 posts, read 684,967 times
Reputation: 3394
You're working with sociopaths. It is a GOOD IDEA to avoid them.

You could be a saint and they'll badmouth you. That's how these kind of people roll.

Unless management starts making adverse employment decisions based on their badmouthing, ignore them. If management DOES make adverse employment decisions against you then you can look for another job and then sue them for having a hostile work environment.
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Old 04-29-2019, 10:26 AM
 
Location: Greensboro, NC
636 posts, read 238,381 times
Reputation: 1537
Nope. I go to work to get a job done not make friends. If the latter does happen, great. If not, oh well; I have plenty of friends outside of work. Then again, I don't have management aspirations lol. I'm sure I'd be singing a different tune if I did.
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Old 04-29-2019, 10:29 AM
 
41 posts, read 11,733 times
Reputation: 15
Quote:
Originally Posted by BrianGC View Post
Nope. I go to work to get a job done not make friends. If the latter does happen, great. If not, oh well; I have plenty of friends outside of work. Then again, I don't have management aspirations lol. I'm sure I'd be singing a different tune if I did.
Why would it be different if you had management aspirations?
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Old 04-29-2019, 10:34 AM
 
Location: Greensboro, NC
636 posts, read 238,381 times
Reputation: 1537
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post
Why would it be different if you had management aspirations?
Eh, wouldn't aspiring managers want to be "liked" to have a better chance?
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Old 04-29-2019, 10:44 AM
 
Location: Northern Virginia
5,104 posts, read 5,387,964 times
Reputation: 12612
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrangeFlounder View Post
I started a job in January with a good salary and location. I like it. I work basically on a team of 2 and a boss above that. As far as I know, Iím doing a good job in their eyes.

Itís the others that seem to be the problem. My thing is to keep my head low, be nice and respectful, and do the best job I can. Just stay off the radar.

Other employees were nice to me at first, and I saw their interactions. Then I was involved in conversations where they bad mouth each other, but are nice to their face. Right then and there I wanted to be off the radar, but now Iím being talked about.

I heard one of the girls talking to someone, and I heard my name when I walked by. I donít know if it was good or bad, but I definitely heard my name.

I donít work with this girl. I donít really have any interaction with her.

Do you care what your coworkers think of you?
I care that my co-workers respect me professionally and treat me civilly.

My advice to you is to set a professional boundary with your co-workers. Be civil but focus your conversations on business matters only. If you want to talk about some personal things, keep to "safe" topics such as the weather, weekend plans (small talk things) and keep it positive. If the conversation starts to take a negative turn, excuse yourself.
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Old 04-29-2019, 11:23 AM
 
609 posts, read 265,264 times
Reputation: 1473
-You don't work directly with these people.
-It doesn't sound like they have any type of authority in the company.
-The people you work under will never ask for their opinion of you when it comes to advancement.

My attitude would be "Who the F&#* cares?"
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Old 04-29-2019, 12:29 PM
 
6,536 posts, read 2,358,678 times
Reputation: 15029
[quote=StrangeFlounder;55058535]I started a job in January with a good salary and location. I like it. I work basically on a team of 2 and a boss above that. As far as I know, Iím doing a good job in their eyes.

Itís the others that seem to be the problem. My thing is to keep my head low, be nice and respectful, and do the best job I can. Just stay off the radar.

Other employees were nice to me at first, and I saw their interactions. Then I was involved in conversations where they bad mouth each other, but are nice to their face. Right then and there I wanted to be off the radar, but now Iím being talked about.

I heard one of the girls talking to someone, and I heard my name when I walked by. I donít know if it was good or bad, but I definitely heard my name.

I donít work with this girl. I donít really have any interaction with her.

Do you care what your coworkers think of you?[/quote]


Well...yes...and no.


Like someone else said, if it's someone I respect, or like...it matters more to me. Or, if it's someone who seems to have some power in the dynamic...I will worry some about what kind of damage they can do to me.


But in YOUR scenario OP...I wouldn't worry about it to much. If YOU are aware of their propensisty for bad mouthing behind someone's back, it's probably fair to say most people in the office are aware of it.


Also...you're not even sure what she was talking about. She could've been saying "I really like the color of OP's hair." Or she could've been saying "I wonder what the name of that pefume was that OP was wearing." Who knows.


If it were me, I'd try to let it roll off of me, and don't let it occupy space in my head.
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Old 04-29-2019, 12:56 PM
 
1,674 posts, read 548,866 times
Reputation: 3560
Professionally speaking, it's important some people respect me. On a personal level, it's advantageous for people to like you.

I won't bend over backwards to be friends, but any job will be more difficult than it needs to be if co-workers don't know and respect you to a degree. Trying to get anything done without having the respect of colleagues is always difficult, regardless of how smart or skilled you are.
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