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Old 05-09-2019, 09:53 PM
Status: "Disagreeing is not the same thing as trolling." (set 10 days ago)
 
Location: Texas
9,522 posts, read 3,654,679 times
Reputation: 19552

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Quote:
Originally Posted by rah-ghr View Post
My questions is have you ever left your workplace but still feel affected by the bad people?
Sort of.

I used to work with a bully when I was in my 20s. She was also very competitive. It was a recruiting firm for tech people. I learned that some people in the workplace can be psycho. One time she spied on me by following me home from work. Last I heard, she still works in the recruiting business, she even gave up having a family for this career. But it's not like some six figure income. It's just an average job. But I suppose to her it means a lot.
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Old 05-10-2019, 12:24 AM
 
2,082 posts, read 1,857,601 times
Reputation: 2680
I was never under my past supervisor's radar until people started talking behind my back to her and I ended up on the **** list.


Things pretty much happen for a reason.

I'm in a much happier spot after I left.
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Old 05-10-2019, 06:07 AM
 
Location: Pittsford, NY
520 posts, read 625,935 times
Reputation: 581
Quote:
Originally Posted by rah-ghr View Post

My questions is have you ever left your workplace but still feel affected by the bad people?

I think this is not uncommon. I had that one aggressive guy who was not my boss for most of my time but really resented our group. He was all management/bragging and I was all doing stuff/looking for merit, so we didn't work right together at all. One time a dispute erupted on workspace and he grabbed me a bit angrily, saying "Do you know who I am? " He was already in management, so very threatening and violent in what he did to me. He wasn't too physical just mad in my face real nastily. Later he rose up and somehow my group of employees ended up under him. I lasted not long, he was a super jerk who hated people who did stuff like me.

Yes, it stays with me 30 years later even I can tell you, but not in a major way. I just was a rookie and never realized how aggressive some who want to move up the ladder can get. I mean I also learned a lesson to stay away from aggressive management and hierarchy aimed management people. So I got through the rest of my career knowing that. Not much you can do about the jerks who are all so ready to toss anyone under the bus, but you can learn to stay away from them all. I did for rest of my career. I think I enjoyed my career better that way, but I do feel sad for those who work under those kinds.
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Old 05-10-2019, 06:17 AM
 
3,764 posts, read 3,503,255 times
Reputation: 8933
Quote:
Originally Posted by PriscillaVanilla View Post
Sort of.

I used to work with a bully when I was in my 20s. She was also very competitive. It was a recruiting firm for tech people. I learned that some people in the workplace can be psycho. One time she spied on me by following me home from work. Last I heard, she still works in the recruiting business, she even gave up having a family for this career. But it's not like some six figure income. It's just an average job. But I suppose to her it means a lot.
That's probably a good thing for the world

Everyone has a cruddy job from time to time. You just have to learn to not bring it home with you. Life's too short.

My wife lost her adult teaching job last year and still hasn't gotten over it. Totally lost her self-confidence because of these obsessive doofs at the school who were overly criticizing her teaching methods. The students loved her, so she must have been doing something right.

Too bad, but life has to go on. Money's tight and we need two incomes. Sometimes you have to set your feelings aside for the greater good, that is for the family and your own financial security.

But when it's gone too far... line up a fresh new job, give them as much notice as they deserve, and begone! There's nothing sweeter than walking out of a dysfunctional workplace for the very last time.
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Old 05-10-2019, 06:17 AM
 
71 posts, read 21,407 times
Reputation: 179
OP. Think of it as a learning experience; that is, your learned how not to act as a bad co-worker or bad supervisor, and that you will be a better co-worker or supervisor than those idiots.
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Old 05-10-2019, 06:28 AM
 
101 posts, read 29,209 times
Reputation: 266
Yeah I've experienced these types of workplaces....sadly they seem to be pretty common in my field, which is why I am now working for myslef. I will be honest...those experiences have made me really question the industry I'm in...I'm sure toxic people are everywhere but I feel that some industries tend to be more exploitative than others.
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Old 05-10-2019, 07:10 AM
 
Location: Vermont
1,383 posts, read 464,204 times
Reputation: 2030
What an awful situation to be in. I've been there before.
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Old 05-10-2019, 07:18 AM
 
Location: Maryland
1,768 posts, read 567,815 times
Reputation: 3899
I had one verbally abusive manager. He actually wrote on my performance review that I was not manipulative enough of people, apparently seeing that as a positive trait. The company sent him to two management training sessions (to no good), removed all personnel authority from him and eventually let him go. I wasn’t traumatized by him. I was just pissed off and wanted out, which I soon did.

The main thing that has bred continuing mistrust in me is the almost CONSTANT lying I encountered. Saying they would do something, then denying it and leaving me hanging because I made the mistake of trusting them.
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Old 05-10-2019, 07:38 AM
 
780 posts, read 203,923 times
Reputation: 1134
My last employer had an extremely toxic culture. I stayed with them for two years, went through about six management changes in our department. It was a non-profit, government subsidized agency where some old timers had been there maybe a bit too long and were a little too comfortable throwing anyone and everyone under the bus. It nearly broke me emotionally and mentally, as it went against everything I'd ever believed in: be a good person, meritocracy, be a go getter and reap the rewards, etc. Management essentially punished me for seeking out duties that better aligned with my 'senior analyst' job title. There was absolutely no reward in taking on more duties either. No promotions, 1% pay increases year over year, etc. Even after I left, I heard through the grapevine that one individual whom I had little to no working relationship was talking poorly about me to other people. Fortunately, one of my former co-workers who knew my work ethic was there and called him out on my behalf.

Management was corrupt and dysfunctional. I hated that place so, so, so much. It was such a huge relief to eventually get out of there. However, I still find myself very hesitant to believe management/co-workers at face value. That place opened my eyes to how many people have an agenda, and how easily they will/can steamroll you if you get in the way of it. It explains the 40%+ attrition rate the organization experienced in my two years there.

Learn from the experience. My experience taught me to hold my cards closer to my chest. Don't become overly emotionally invested in the company or the job. When you start seeing the signs of dysfunction, don't try to change it; plan your exit. There is very little you can do personally about institutional dysfunction.
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Old 05-10-2019, 01:07 PM
 
Location: Maryland
1,768 posts, read 567,815 times
Reputation: 3899
Reading this thread reminds me of a joke.

“A fellow had just been hired as the new CEO of a large tech corporation. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and presented him with three numbered envelopes. "Open one of these if you run up against a problem you don't think you can solve," he said.

Things went along pretty smoothly, but six months later, sales took a downturn and the CEO was really catching a lot of heat. About at his wit's end, he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope. The message read, "Blame your predecessor."

The new CEO called a press conference and tactfully laid the blame at the feet of the previous CEO. Satisfied with his comments, the press - and Wall Street - responded positively, sales began to pick up and the problem was soon behind him.

About a year later, the company was again experiencing a slight dip in sales, combined with serious product problems. Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope. The message read, "Reorganize."

This he did, and the company quickly rebounded.
After several consecutive profitable quarters, the company once again fell on difficult times. The CEO went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope.

The message said, "Prepare three envelopes."

Prepare Three Envelopes - Really Short Funny Jokes
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