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Old 06-02-2019, 06:48 AM
 
3,963 posts, read 1,690,813 times
Reputation: 8059

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Suburban_Guy View Post
Is it really going to kill you that much to do it?

You already agreed in principle to do this, not only to her, but also your boss thanked you for doing this.

You should have said something right off the bat on the phone, which you realize, but you didn't, so deal with it. What's done is done, is it worth looking bad now and backtracking?

Since you have the blessing from your boss, it shouldn't be that hard to find some time to do this. The biggest challenge is getting the first weekly news letter out. But once you figured out all the logistics and details, it should get easier after that. Besides, you say you are a manager, can't you also delegate some aspects of this?
He didnít agree to do this. He agreed to *help* with the newsletter, not totally take it over and have her dictate the terms. It seems like they are on the same level professionally, and if he is going to take it over, he should either get to dictate the terms (e.g. doing it monthly) or he should politely explain that he misunderstood the scope of the task and after thinking it over, he realizes that he doesnít have time to completely take over a weekly newsletter at this point and do his regular duties. It might very well be that the boss doesnít understand the scope of the duties either.
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Old 06-02-2019, 07:02 AM
 
17,252 posts, read 10,176,823 times
Reputation: 28768
Quote:
Originally Posted by RamenAddict View Post
He didn’t agree to do this. He agreed to *help* with the newsletter, not totally take it over and have her dictate the terms. It seems like they are on the same level professionally, and if he is going to take it over, he should either get to dictate the terms (e.g. doing it monthly) or he should politely explain that he misunderstood the scope of the task and after thinking it over, he realizes that he doesn’t have time to completely take over a weekly newsletter at this point and do his regular duties. It might very well be that the boss doesn’t understand the scope of the duties either.
Actually, he did agree, straight from the horse's mouth:

Quote:
I realize now that I should have said right then and there that I don't want to do it but I told her that I didn't really feel that it was in my wheelhouse but that I would give it a try. I also suggested that she change it from a weekly format to only once a month so there will be less pressure to come up with interesting and new and relevant topics. But she said she'd rather stick with weekly but might consider bi-weekly in the future.
Not agreeing would have been him declining this from the very beginning with a simple thanks but no thanks. The fact that he said he would give it a try means he is agreeing to to this (albeit reluctantly).

What's eating away at the OP is not necessarily this assignment per se, but more the fact that the OP was unable to set a clear boundary and just say no. I'm sure there are many people out there who would have immediately said no thank you, just because they have a strong personality and are not pushovers. In fact I know several people like that.

But it bothers the OP because he felt like a weak pushover, a yes man, and I get it because I am the same way and cannot say no because I feel like I have to agree to anything lest I feel like I am not a 'team' player and all that sort of thing.

That's what this thread is all about, a vent thread (aren't they all on this part of the forum). Will the OP find the 'courage' to sit down and politely decline? I'm sure he'll want to prove me wrong, but I don't think he will. At the most, he may clarify that he will be given time to do this task from his immediate boss. Ultimately I don't think it's a bad thing. Sensitive people like me think everyone out there wants to take advantage of us and have ulterior motives, and we hate ourselves for being pushovers and yes men. But it is what it is, make the most out of this task. You never know, it might turn out to be fun especially if you can put some nice touches on it (humor, pictures, etc.).
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