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Old 10-05-2021, 07:32 AM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
38,398 posts, read 49,977,727 times
Reputation: 50651

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Skeffington View Post
I worked at a few places that did this...one tried to guilt trip people who refused to donate to United Way by posting their names on a "Wall of Shame" and in the newsletter. Luckily, this work place was unionized, and after a union grievance was filed, HR was ordered to cease and desist the harassment. I always just gave a token one-time-only donation of $1.00. I "donated" on record, but it got across how I felt about the United Way extortion.

Where I am now working, we take up a donation if there is a serious illness or death in the family, or if someone is retiring. There will be an envelope for cash left in the breakroom and a card to sign, but it is purely voluntary. No check off lists...but it's an honor system to not sign the card if you didn't donate.
I've seen that Wall of Shame. Everybody's name (and a couple times picture) are put up and when you donated you got a gold star beside it. A couple times a running total of participation percent was above the board.
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Old 10-05-2021, 08:10 AM
 
Location: Wooster, Ohio
2,525 posts, read 1,544,846 times
Reputation: 4265
It was a big deal early in my career when I was poor. I learned both to say no and to tolerate the shaming. Toward the end of my career these requests became more common. By that time, I was able to just give $10 or $20 when these requests occurred.

I specifically thanked my coworkers for not taking up a collection when I retired. I was a millionaire by then. Why should younger coworkers with a fraction of my net worth be donating to me? It would have made me cringe.
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Old 10-05-2021, 10:17 AM
 
477 posts, read 187,268 times
Reputation: 1449
My direct workgroup (people I interact with on a daily basis) is pretty small. About a dozen give or take. Only been asked to chip in when it's related to someone in this group, probably 2-3 times in 5 years. And I had no issue doing so since it was people I know pretty well and not a super frequent thing. When my wife had our baby last May everyone chipped in to buy us some diapers and baby wipes. Thought that was super nice.

I could see it getting irritating if it was on a bigger scale. Like an office of 200 people and every week you're getting hit up to give to someone you don't even know and never work with.

The charity donation "wall of shame" thing is pretty appalling IMHO. Charity should be a voluntary decision a person makes, shouldn't be guilted into it. We don't know what everyone is doing outside the workplace. Someone could be donating big bucks to a number of charities outside of work. Or actually donating their time and energy to charitable organizations. But now if they don't want to pony up another $20 they are made to look selfish.
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Old 10-05-2021, 10:42 AM
 
7,475 posts, read 6,415,168 times
Reputation: 10865
Quote:
Originally Posted by simplechamp View Post
My direct workgroup (people I interact with on a daily basis) is pretty small. About a dozen give or take. Only been asked to chip in when it's related to someone in this group, probably 2-3 times in 5 years. And I had no issue doing so since it was people I know pretty well and not a super frequent thing. When my wife had our baby last May everyone chipped in to buy us some diapers and baby wipes. Thought that was super nice.

I could see it getting irritating if it was on a bigger scale. Like an office of 200 people and every week you're getting hit up to give to someone you don't even know and never work with.

The charity donation "wall of shame" thing is pretty appalling IMHO. Charity should be a voluntary decision a person makes, shouldn't be guilted into it. We don't know what everyone is doing outside the workplace. Someone could be donating big bucks to a number of charities outside of work. Or actually donating their time and energy to charitable organizations. But now if they don't want to pony up another $20 they are made to look selfish.
I hate when someone appoints themselves the "gift buyer" and chooses something outrageously expensive, then tells everyone what their "contribution" is.

A certain former co-worker did this a lot...she once ordered a bereavement gift for another employee, who had a death in the family (sister in law). She ordered an extremely expensive spiral cut ham platter with all the fancy accompaniments, then told everyone they're "contribution" would be $20.00. I can see for a child, spouse, parent maybe? But a SISTER IN LAW?

BTW, the union made the company remove our "Wall of Shame".
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Old 10-05-2021, 11:12 AM
 
Location: Southeast Michigan
131 posts, read 47,071 times
Reputation: 303
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mrs. Skeffington View Post
She ordered an extremely expensive spiral cut ham platter with all the fancy accompaniments, then told everyone they're "contribution" would be $20.00. I can see for a child, spouse, parent maybe? But a SISTER IN LAW?
People actually put up with that? lol
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Old 10-05-2021, 11:36 AM
 
Location: Dallas
6,277 posts, read 5,947,784 times
Reputation: 19147
Call centers are notorious for a never ending request for donations. Thank God I now work from home. Seemed like every other day it was someone's birthday, and a card would be passed around, which I didn't have a problem with. However, the birthday girl or boy would then walk through our department with dollar bills pinned to their shirt and people would donate directly to the birthday person. Talk about being put on the spot.

The worst is around Christmas, and the organizers of Secret Santa would decree a certain dollar amount (usually high considering what we all made) or more recently, the 10 days of Christmas, where a small gift would be given to the recipient for each of the 10 days.
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Old 10-05-2021, 02:21 PM
 
13,330 posts, read 15,214,342 times
Reputation: 17910
Depends on who the request is from really.

My close personal team that i've worked with for the better part of 15 years and spend more time per week with than my family, including some after hours socialization? SUre. I'll give money for an event. They gave me a gift for my wedding and my child's birth, and i've reciprocated. I consider these folks to be friends.

John in accounting who i've had 1 conversation with in the last year is having a baby? Congrats but i'm not giving money for a gift.
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Old 10-05-2021, 03:46 PM
 
Location: Florida and the Rockies
1,701 posts, read 1,798,673 times
Reputation: 2594
Quote:
Originally Posted by aquietpath View Post
Call centers are notorious for a never ending request for donations. Thank God I now work from home. Seemed like every other day it was someone's birthday, and a card would be passed around, which I didn't have a problem with. However, the birthday girl or boy would then walk through our department with dollar bills pinned to their shirt and people would donate directly to the birthday person. Talk about being put on the spot.

The worst is around Christmas, and the organizers of Secret Santa would decree a certain dollar amount (usually high considering what we all made) or more recently, the 10 days of Christmas, where a small gift would be given to the recipient for each of the 10 days.
I joined a small department ten years ago, three workers and a manager. Anyhow, we inherited a tradition to fund a small birthday gift of 20 bucks for each of us. This five-dollar hit happened four times per year, nicely spaced. Not a big ask.

Soon, our department grew and grew again, merging with some other workgroups in the division -- by five years ago we had hit 25 people. But the cash birthday collection continued, and in fact somehow increased in cost, so that I was donating ten bucks every other week to this "fund."

It had turned into a full-sized cake plus a card plus "snacks" plus a cash gift for THIRTY colleagues (the organizer had added some honorary members) -- there was a constant request for $$$ (always from the same woman -- tellingly she also turned out to be the nosiest of the bunch), to say nothing of the constant carboloading (who needs that at the office?)

And the participation was "enforced," meaning if you didn't make your weekly $$$ tribute, the enforcer would hound mercilessly -- e-mails, text messages, showing up at the desk with her manila envelope stuffed with cash. No one ever tried to opt out, it was just how this department operated.

One of the nice things about COVID, was this "tradition" immediately ceased. The hours of "planning" time wasted, plus purchase of cake on each birthday (always required another hour for her), the additional hour of singing and cake-eating in the afternoon, plus of course the cold hard cash diverted to pay for all of this.
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Old 10-05-2021, 04:13 PM
 
Location: North Beach, MD on the Chesapeake
38,398 posts, read 49,977,727 times
Reputation: 50651
Quote:
Originally Posted by westender View Post
I joined a small department ten years ago, three workers and a manager. Anyhow, we inherited a tradition to fund a small birthday gift of 20 bucks for each of us. This five-dollar hit happened four times per year, nicely spaced. Not a big ask.

Soon, our department grew and grew again, merging with some other workgroups in the division -- by five years ago we had hit 25 people. But the cash birthday collection continued, and in fact somehow increased in cost, so that I was donating ten bucks every other week to this "fund."

It had turned into a full-sized cake plus a card plus "snacks" plus a cash gift for THIRTY colleagues (the organizer had added some honorary members) -- there was a constant request for $$$ (always from the same woman -- tellingly she also turned out to be the nosiest of the bunch), to say nothing of the constant carboloading (who needs that at the office?)

And the participation was "enforced," meaning if you didn't make your weekly $$$ tribute, the enforcer would hound mercilessly -- e-mails, text messages, showing up at the desk with her manila envelope stuffed with cash. No one ever tried to opt out, it was just how this department operated.

One of the nice things about COVID, was this "tradition" immediately ceased. The hours of "planning" time wasted, plus purchase of cake on each birthday (always required another hour for her), the additional hour of singing and cake-eating in the afternoon, plus of course the cold hard cash diverted to pay for all of this.
The best one I saw was when my Principal was named Principal of the Year by one community group or another. The award came with a $20,000 check.

So, the usual sycophants started going around to the staff for a $10 contribution (each from 70 teachers) to buy him a congratulatory present.
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Old 10-05-2021, 07:47 PM
 
12,681 posts, read 6,979,819 times
Reputation: 20570
Quote:
Originally Posted by Threestep2 View Post
Just say no.
That's what I did. Granted, it didn't make me the most popular person...
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