Dealing with a bad boss (credit, secretary, work, companies)

[Riezner]

Hey all,
First post here. Wondering if anyone has any effective ways to deal with a troublesome boss. I started work at a coffee shop a couple weeks ago and the manager that interviewed and hired me was very impressed and outgoing. At first I thought this was good, but now he seems to think we're good friends or something. He's a younger guy, and I'm in my 20s as well, so I think he assumes we can be pals, when I don't want to be. He's very childish and makes some pretty on the fence comments at times. I want to make the impression that I'm simply a worker, not a buddy. How do I do that without sacrificing my job?

All the best.

[gea12345]

a few things that have worked for me and against me are:

1) be neutral in your expression,
2) listen, don't talk, but smile or nod, whatever is best.
3) He will pick up on your distance and wonder, so don't talk to any co-workers about your problem
4) use family as sounding board
5) stay busy... if slow, then go outside and clean windows
6) Be fair, keep your talk time about the same, whether you are talking to a customer or co-worker
7) don't read or cell phone because you are slow, instead clean the shelves, even if they are clean; stay busy with busy work
8) be consistent with your behavior; if boss is gone, still stay busy; build your creditability with your co-workers and boss and customers
9) at some indpendent coffee shops, it is possible to bring a laptop. Use it behind the counter, don't sit down in customer seats
10) don't shy away from building work friendships, since it will help you, if you **uck up at some point on the job!

hope this helps and good luck!;-)

[Hesster]

If your worst problem with your boss is that he's too friendly (assuming that he's not coming onto you), then count yourself lucky.

[stevemorse]

I agree with Hesster, why not be friendly? He is young, give him your advise when asked, be yourself and enjoy that you have such a nice boss. When I worked for a big corporation, Sealed Air, I would say hi to my boss how was your weekend, he called me in his office one day sat me down and said this:

Look Marilyn I do not want to talk about my weekend, I do not want you to talk to me, if you have work questions you must write in in a memo and send it. You do not talk to me at all about anything not even one question.

SO I sat in my office all day, wrote memos to give to the secretary to type to give to him and became the most miserable person sitting all day along!!!

[gea12345]

Great Story about the other flip side!

I had an attorney who would come in almost every morning and tell us her weekend, children, etc... and we "got" to listen. It was not a two way street. Then she would rush off to do her work and then we were supposed to go back to work. Personally, I preferred her husband, another attorney, who i never discussed weekend stuff with, but near the end of the day, we would discuss politics and legal stuff. I enjoyed that! Often people feel that they have to make up stuff, when people ask about their weekends, since usually they are boring! ;-)

Originally Posted by stevemorse

I agree with Hesster, why not be friendly? He is young, give him your advise when asked, be yourself and enjoy that you have such a nice boss. When I worked for a big corporation, Sealed Air, I would say hi to my boss how was your weekend, he called me in his office one day sat me down and said this:

Look Marilyn I do not want to talk about my weekend, I do not want you to talk to me, if you have work questions you must write in in a memo and send it. You do not talk to me at all about anything not even one question.

SO I sat in my office all day, wrote memos to give to the secretary to type to give to him and became the most miserable person sitting all day along!!!

[Weekend Traveler]

I do not think there is any good way to deal with a bad boss because you will never change him. Accept him or move on.

[gea12345]

hmmm I dont think the poster has a bad boss, just someone that wants to talk to him...maybe have a drink after work, etc...

At my neighborhood bar, there is a guy who owns a subpoena service and he takes his crew out for drinks several times a week. It is a mostly guy staff, and he has been doing this for years.

There is nothing wrong with treating your boss like a friend. ( I would only caution that if he has to terminate you, reduce your hours or somehow, someway interfere with your check, it will hurt you more, if you are friends.) Also, you want to keep your topics broad, i would think, sports, opposite sex, work, etc.. and not too personal.

Originally Posted by Weekend Traveler

I do not think there is any good way to deal with a bad boss because you will never change him. Accept him or move on.

[NSX]

Originally Posted by Hesster

If your worst problem with your boss is that he's too friendly (assuming that he's not coming onto you), then count yourself lucky.

I second that. That's a problem that most people I know WISH they could have.

[sinsativ]

Troll Alert, Weekend Traveler, We're on to you.

[Riezner]

Thanks for the responses!

I suppose I should be lucky that my boss is so friendly. I just haven't been with many companies, so I'm not used to it, usually have had very stern bosses.

Sensativ, what's a troll? That thing looks terrifying, haha.