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Old 12-29-2012, 09:49 PM
 
Location: West Coast
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This ban on Americans adopting Russian kids led me to this question. Many Americans will go around the world to find a child to adopt. They go to Europe, China, Africa, India, etc. Is it that difficult to adopt in the U.S., or do many Americans simply prefer foreign kids?
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Old 12-29-2012, 09:54 PM
 
Location: M I N N E S O T A
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I hear its difficult to adopt children in the U.S.
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Old 12-29-2012, 10:07 PM
 
Location: Inactive Account
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Many reasons....

Most unwed mothers in the USA keep their children, there are various support programs to help them do so. That leaves fewer children available to adopt.

The remaining children available in adoption agencies may have any number of disorders - mental, physical, behavioral. They tend to be older than orphans in other parts of the world, and have lived with "foster" families before. So they have difficulty bonding with the adopting family after bouncing through the system, and living temporarily with fosters.

Healthy children tend to come via "open adoption" here, where the birth mother remains known to the child and may have visitation rights. It's a complication some adoptive parents don't want to handle. It's much simpler for the birth parents to be on the other side of the ocean.

Adoption agencies in the US can be very particular and fussy about the parents they have screened, because of the imbalance of parents to adoptees. It can literally take years for a couple to get through the system to find a child.

Last edited by Sean_CLT; 12-29-2012 at 10:17 PM..
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Old 12-29-2012, 10:22 PM
 
Location: West Coast
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sean_CLT View Post
Many reasons....

Most unwed mothers in the USA keep their children, there are various support programs to help them do so. That leaves fewer children available to adopt.

The remaining children available in adoption agencies may have any number of disorders - mental, physical, behavioral. They tend to be older than orphans in other parts of the world, and have lived with "foster" families before. So they have difficulty bonding with the adopting family after bouncing through the system, and living temporarily with fosters.

Healthy children tend to come via "open adoption" here, where the birth mother remains known to the child and may have visitation rights. It's a complication some adoptive parents don't want to handle. It's much simpler for the birth parents to be on the other side of the ocean.
This is interesting. I suppose it would make it easier to have no contact with the birth parents.
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Old 12-29-2012, 10:50 PM
 
Location: State of Transition
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy74 View Post
This ban on Americans adopting Russian kids led me to this question. Many Americans will go around the world to find a child to adopt. They go to Europe, China, Africa, India, etc. Is it that difficult to adopt in the U.S., or do many Americans simply prefer foreign kids?
There aren't enough kids available for adoption in the US. And the rush to adopt children from Russia and Romania is in part because some families prefer kids who look like they fit in to the family. Many of the kids available for adoption in the US might not match the adoptive parents' ethnicity. Some parents don't mind that, but some Euro-American parents would prefer a European child, if they could get one.
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Old 12-29-2012, 11:20 PM
 
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I knew a couple that adopted a baby from a Romanian orphanage. I think it would have been harder for them to adopt had they tried in the states, they didn't have a lot of money. That was a long time ago now, but they went over there and even volunteered working in the orphanage, I'm sure it didn't cost them a lot.

This link below gives an idea of costs, they say 25 to 40k or more in the USA, a child in foster care costs the least, about 5,000. I wish more people would adopt those kids. But people are funny, some just gotta have a new born. Sometimes its more like buying the child, thats how my Aunt put it when my cousin adopted a newborn, very long ago. I was surprised at the costs in some of the other countries. My fiancee is from the Philippines, and I would bet it wouldn't be near as expensive as most quotes here. But I could be wrong. The orphanages want to find good homes for the kids. They want financially stable people but ya shouldn't have to be rich just to adopt. I wonder what the cost would be to a local couple compared to someone from the USA. People have heard its more of a hassle, takes longer and so on adopting here, so they check into adopting elsewhere. I feel very sorry for kids in foster care, at best its still very hard on them. I feel people are being selfish having their own kids when there are homeless street children in the world with nothing and no chance at all. But thats just my opinion. The ex and I had planned to adopt, there was nothing wrong with either of us, it was a choice we made. I would say some people regardless of race would prefer a child of their own race.

I certainly wouldn't want an open adoption arrangement. It would complicate things.

Babble.com: Just How Much Does Adoption Really Cost?

Here is a little more about cost in other countries. Seems to be quite a number of rules in place in most of the countries, which is good as long as it isn't turning prospective couples off the idea of adopting a child from a particular country. I'll just stick to 4 legged kids that bark or meow.

http://www.baas.org/prog_philippines.php

Last edited by todd00; 12-29-2012 at 11:39 PM..
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Old 12-29-2012, 11:45 PM
 
Location: Vladivostok, Russia
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My humble opinion, don't kill me for it:

1. These American kids are considered by many as sub-humans. Maybe they have different perception of foreign kids - e.g. poor countries, not poor genes.
2. It's a multi-billion dollar business. And like any other business, it tries to attract clients. US adoptions cost from $0. Agency fees for foreign adoptions - $10,000+.
3. Some adopters hope that foreign kids will be greatful that they saved them from death or suffering.

But the story they all tell falls to:

1. They want to save those kids. Makes no sense in case of Russia, where orphans are way better off than in US.

2. It takes too long to adopt domestically. But statistically it takes half the time. Russia is (was) especially bad.

If you wait as long as it takes to adopt from Russia, and spend the same crazy amount ($50,000+), you'll be able to find a perfectly healthy blue-eyed-blonde-girl-infant/toddler (a stereotype of the most demanded child) orphan (no bio parents) in US.

In Russia you can't possibly legally adopt such child - domestic demand is huge. Illegally... alas, happened all the time... But healthy infants costed dearly lately.

I'll explain the "better off" part, to avoid a sarcastic remark that could follow.

1. In orphanages (and US has them too - no matter that they are called differently) conditions are at least similar. Maybe Russian are even better - decent state financing, plus lots of private support. Rooms, food, schooling, sports, toys, entertainment - all decent. It is possible to find a bad one in Russia (today this means - crowded), but in US you can (at least could) find an orphanage that is a strip bar at night, with drugs and pedo rapes...

2. Family foster care is statistically way worse in US. Abuse and rapes are simply extreme there.

3. Kids leaving foster care and orphanages in Russia are guaranteed housing and free rides at any university (they compete for admission with each other, before the general pool).

Housing may be temporary, but the state has to provide them with free apartments. And it does, just not always quickly - in the best places the wait time is 1-2 years, while in the worst - 10+ years. Feds have recently decided to help local governments to fix the wait time problem.

To become homeless they have to sell a flat, and spend the money.

In US 40-50% become homeless. Nobody receives $150,000+ flats. College... what college?

Financial support (for a few years) in both countries is similarly small.

The number of kids without parents is about the same in both countries. Just like the share of kids in foster families (in Russia many of them are actually adopted - just not formally) and orphanages. Just like the share of "special" kids. Racial compositions are different, of course. Still, there are a lot of white kids in US. Closed adoption from a different state - and you don't have to worry about bio parents.

Other than formally adopting, most Russians adopt kids through foster care. Generally without being paid a salary - only a couple hundred bucks that the state provides on food. Curiously, many people don't take those money, either because they are lazy (you need to go somewhere with a bunch of papers to start receive payments) or because they think that it looks like they are paid for adopting (as if there's something wrong with it).

The huge plus in adopting this way is that the child retains all benefits - including a free flat, and a special uni admission. But care should be taken to avoid a child becoming a (co)owner of a housing (above a certain minimal footage) - some people didn't, and are desperately suing the state.
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Old 12-30-2012, 12:29 AM
 
Location: West Coast
1,199 posts, read 2,113,233 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ruth4Truth View Post
There aren't enough kids available for adoption in the US. And the rush to adopt children from Russia and Romania is in part because some families prefer kids who look like they fit in to the family. Many of the kids available for adoption in the US might not match the adoptive parents' ethnicity. Some parents don't mind that, but some Euro-American parents would prefer a European child, if they could get one.
I'm not sure about this. Many will adopt a child from China, India, and Africa. None of these kids would visually blend into a White American family portrait. Nevertheless, these kids are desired.
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Old 12-30-2012, 12:54 AM
 
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Interesting information you provide. But where are you getting your information reference this;

"It is possible to find a bad one in Russia (today this means - crowded), but in US you can (at least could) find an orphanage that is a strip bar at night, with drugs and pedo rapes...". I've yet to hear of an "orphanage" in the USA that is a strip bar at night.

"These American kids are considered by many as sub-humans". I don't know anyone that would consider adopting that would feel the American kids available were sub-human. I don't understand that at all, or why you have that notion.

Figures vary regarding homelessness and foster care. There does seem to be a disproportionate number of
the homeless that have spent time in foster care, according to studies done. That's hardly surprising given what many endure. I've read figures of 30 to 40 percent.

Saving the children isn't a line or some story, I think most people do want to help a child in need as well as wanting a child of their own. Why would they travel half way round the world, spend money, jump through all the hoops if they didn't truly care about the children and hope to give a child a good home. There are homeless children that do need help, maybe they are all doing fine in Russia, but there are many countries where they are not. There are some 2 million street children in the Philippines alone. As stated in the article (link below); "According to the Russian Children’s Welfare Society (RCWS), a non-governmental organization based in New York with an office in Moscow, the proportion of declared orphans is four to five times higher in Russia than in Europe or the United States. Some 30 percent live in orphanages. Most are children who have been either given up by their parents or removed from dysfunctional homes by the authorities. According to a 2008 trial census, Russia has around 700,000 orphans." I wonder how many street children there are, I'm sure there is still a significant problem.

Any sources you have reference the same number of kids available there as here, or anything else discussed would be appreciated.

‚€œWho‚€™s taking care of Russia‚€™s orphans?‚€Ě | Features & Opinion | RIA Novosti

Most thinking people don't care about color. 1 in 12 marriages today are interracial, that number will only grow. This isn't 1960 America. God, this gets soo old.
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Old 12-30-2012, 01:50 AM
 
Location: State Fire and Ice
3,079 posts, read 4,306,113 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joy74 View Post
This ban on Americans adopting Russian kids led me to this question. Many Americans will go around the world to find a child to adopt. They go to Europe, China, Africa, India, etc. Is it that difficult to adopt in the U.S., or do many Americans simply prefer foreign kids?
To take the kids in America, you need to wait very long for that to happen.(usually take an infant child in America is almost impossible because you have to wait years.) the second reason for those parents who are denied adoption in the U.S., trying to adopt them in another country, as it is easier to do. The main reason for which parents can not take the child in U.S - the inconsistency of the psyche. (ie people or mentally ill or mentally not ready for a family)The third, I think Ruth said is true.
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