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Do you guys notice that when you're in a country or culture (or maybe just in a specific state, town or city) you dont fit into and dont belong in, you get bad negative vibes from the people and social atmosphere? Vibes that tell you you're a loser and weirdo who is unwanted, unaccepted and disliked? Doesnt that f**k up your self esteem and confidence after a while? Like kryptonite does to Superman? Thats how I felt in Prague in the Czech Republic. On the other hand I felt much better in Bratislava, like I belonged and that's a not too different culture. I also got a friendlier vibe in Vienna.
You get negative vibes from people and going out feels awkward and draining and exhausting and boring. Its like everywhere u go u feel this bad vibe from people that tells u "you dont belong here. We dont like u. Youre a weirdo and freak. You and us are like oil and water, matter and antimatter". You know what i mean? Do u experience that too when ur a total misit somewhere where u have nothing in common with people there?
In Slovakia and Hungary, even though i dont agree with everything or like everything, at least there is some synergy and chemistry with people, which creates energy. Thus the vibe feels better and going out doesn't feel weird or awkward. You dont get that "you dont belong here, we dont like u" etc. type of vibe from everyone, depsite them being reserved.
As a young kid we lived in Germany. Even though I was a young buck, I could tell that Germany's ultra rigid, strict, formal and stern atmosphere was not for me! Even today when I see tourists from Germany who are travelling abroad, they carry these same traits that I witnessed. I'm more of a fun loving, easy going type of person. My personality and that of folks from Germany certainly don't mesh well. I guess that was the problem in Prague too, they act very German-like while folks in Bratislava are closer to me. Or just the place is a good-luck one and I better fit in their "cultural egregore" if you prefer more woo woo explanations. But even in country where I must feel nice like Turkey (v similar to Bulgaria) I feel uneasy and like I wouldn't want to live there if you pay me, same with most of Spain. Portugal on the other hand I like a lot.
Know what i mean? Have u experienced that too?
Last edited by tomektomek; 05-21-2022 at 02:08 PM..
I'm not that well-traveled internationally but I can say I felt more at home working for a decade inside the Washington D.C. Beltway than I did working for a few years in New Orleans or even in downtown Albuquerque.
As far as internationally, I really felt like a "Martian" in Morocco for the few weeks I worked there. However, I felt right at home in Chile. I am the most average American in looks, size and intelligence you'll ever meet.
Maybe this is why I now call most "diversity" a crock for most average humans. I do know that retirement happiness for me has been living in a place where my neighbors are culturally and politically similar to me.
But then possibly my feelings are more related to the sad state of affairs America now finds itself in?
Last edited by High_Plains_Retired; 05-21-2022 at 03:50 PM..
The first thing I remember from the Vienna metro is this quite beautiful blonde local lady looking at me during my whole commute and smiling. I even feel bad I never said anything to her, though I'm not sure how she would've reacted to English. :Same with Bratislava - I had two of the hottest coworkers I've ever had there (model-like looks) and they were also constantly flirting.
These things never happen to me here in Sofia where I'm lucky if I get a glance by a woman! Prague and Dresden were very similar to Sofia with its standoffish vibes.
I joke that if I went to Vienna/Bratislava as a student with all the parties at uni I'd be married by now. I guess locals there find me hotter or something. I can't understand how they can like me so much while in Prague and Dresden, two very similar cultures to Bratislava and Vienna respectively they were so standoffish to me. Other people have great time there, so it's not the place, it's the way it doesn't resonate with me personally. It helped me even at work, Slovakia was the 1st and so far only place where I got my probation shortened and got a full contract. I also made friends faster there than in Bulgaria! Of course with the good there was some not-so-good - drama, two fighting flatmates wanted me to take sides.
The area around Vienna and Bratislava feels more like home to me. I consider Prague more beautiful than both, and yet for living I'd always chose Vienna and B'lava. I actually had deja view vibes in Bratislava, like I've been there before. As I said in another thread I even broke down and cried when leaving. Bratislava is kinda drab compared to Prague but it's really all about the vibe of a place and the people you meet.
As a young kid we lived in Germany. Even though I was a young buck, I could tell that Germany's ultra rigid, strict, formal and stern atmosphere was not for me! Even today when I see tourists from Germany who are travelling abroad, they carry these same traits that I witnessed. I'm more of a fun loving, easy going type of person. My personality and that of folks from Germany certainly don't mesh well.
Funny you should mention this! I also lived in Germany as a kid and picked up the same vibe! I’m an absolute goofball and tend to be the happy go lucky type so I didn’t mesh well either.
My wife and I go to Thailand as such as our budget can afford. We talk to many others from Europe and they all feel the same way about the Germans. So their reputation proceeds them!
Oh well. On a political note, America has gotten so liberal and anti strict, I wouldn’t mind importing some of that strictness, work ethic, high standards and attention to detail to the States. But I would not import their lack of humor. No excuse for grumpy people.
Berlin - Everyone was just kind of unpleasant. They were either staring because I was Asian or they were so into Berlin that they had to talk about it non-stop which felt straight out of a pyramid scheme/cult.
Budapest - Locals were incredibly grumpy/rude. Almost all the service people acted like they ****ing hated their job. Just an all around joyless city. I did like most of the monuments, though.
Do you guys notice that when you're in a country or culture (or maybe just in a specific state, town or city) you dont fit into and dont belong in, you get bad negative vibes from the people and social atmosphere? Vibes that tell you you're a loser and weirdo who is unwanted, unaccepted and disliked? Doesnt that f**k up your self esteem and confidence after a while? Like kryptonite does to Superman? Thats how I felt in Prague in the Czech Republic. On the other hand I felt much better in Bratislava, like I belonged and that's a not too different culture. I also got a friendlier vibe in Vienna.
You get negative vibes from people and going out feels awkward and draining and exhausting and boring. Its like everywhere u go u feel this bad vibe from people that tells u "you dont belong here. We dont like u. Youre a weirdo and freak. You and us are like oil and water, matter and antimatter". You know what i mean? Do u experience that too when ur a total misit somewhere where u have nothing in common with people there?
In Slovakia and Hungary, even though i dont agree with everything or like everything, at least there is some synergy and chemistry with people, which creates energy. Thus the vibe feels better and going out doesn't feel weird or awkward. You dont get that "you dont belong here, we dont like u" etc. type of vibe from everyone, depsite them being reserved.
As a young kid we lived in Germany. Even though I was a young buck, I could tell that Germany's ultra rigid, strict, formal and stern atmosphere was not for me! Even today when I see tourists from Germany who are travelling abroad, they carry these same traits that I witnessed. I'm more of a fun loving, easy going type of person. My personality and that of folks from Germany certainly don't mesh well. I guess that was the problem in Prague too, they act very German-like while folks in Bratislava are closer to me. Or just the place is a good-luck one and I better fit in their "cultural egregore" if you prefer more woo woo explanations. But even in country where I must feel nice like Turkey (v similar to Bulgaria) I feel uneasy and like I wouldn't want to live there if you pay me, same with most of Spain. Portugal on the other hand I like a lot.
Know what i mean? Have u experienced that too?
No - it's only you. You generate your own bad vibes.
I always feel out of place in Asia as the 6’2” blue eyed white guy. It’s not a negative vibe. It’s being so obviously different. I’ve worked for Korean and Taiwanese companies. Everyone is very gracious but the culture is very different.
Do you guys notice that when you're in a country or culture (or maybe just in a specific state, town or city) you dont fit into and dont belong in, you get bad negative vibes from the people and social atmosphere? Vibes that tell you you're a loser and weirdo who is unwanted, unaccepted and disliked? Doesnt that f**k up your self esteem and confidence after a while? Like kryptonite does to Superman?
Believe or not, in London.
The only time I visited London, I stayed in a hotel located in Paddington district, in front of the Hyde Park. It has nothing to do with the people, and it wouldn't even qualify as a bad vibe, but I found that place so perfect and posh that I had a sensation of being unworthy of being there, with someone telling to me: "are you sure you are allowed to walk on these streets?". Don't ask me why, there no reason for feeling like this, but I did.
Believe or not, in London.
The only time I visited London, I stayed in a hotel located in Paddington district, in front of the Hyde Park. It has nothing to do with the people, and it wouldn't even qualify as a bad vibe, but I found that place so perfect and posh that I had a sensation of being unworthy of being there, with someone telling to me: "are you sure you are allowed to walk on these streets?". Don't ask me why, there no reason for feeling like this, but I did.
There are parts of London, where there are a lot mega rich people, exclusive clubs, restaurants as well as very expensive houses and cars, and I guess it can be easy to feel excluded in such circumstances.
However the same can be said of some areas in other cities such as Paris or even exclusive enclaves or suburbs such as the Hamptons on Long Island, parts of LA and California, and places such as Saint Tropez, Monaco, Marbella and Puerto Banús and numerous other parts of the South of France and Mediterranean.
The type of places were there are polo clubs and luxury yachts, along with a certain social set with their must go to parties, are often the places that the average person may feel excluded.
It also should be noted that there are numerous large surbuban private estates and gated communities around many cities, where this feeling of exclusion is often worse than actually in the exclusive city areas.
I used to feel like that before I realized most of those people are rich on the backs of hard-working people who sustain their businesses so I no longer feel like that. In fact I feel like I have every right to be on the yacht parties of the CEO of my company as I'm one of the little cogs that make his machine of a corporation work. He's not gonna invite me of course but I might as well enjoy the splendor of posh places, thank you very much!
As for good vibes I'll nominate Vienna and Bratislava jointly. The 1st time I took the Vienna metro a hot blonde young girl flirted with me. And I've never dated so often and had so many flirty coworkers as in Bratislava. Prague and Dresden were the opposite, stand-offish vibes from the people, despite supposedly similar cultures to Bratislava and Vienna respectfully. So yes, it's all about a vibe.
I love Gibraltar and the Algarve but I just don't feel any attraction towards most of Spain except Seville. I feel drawn to Northern Bulgaria and Hungary but can't stand Romania. I love Greece but can't see the thing about Istanbul and Turkey. Sweden's fun but Norway, Denmark and Sweden are a no-no for me. I believe it's past life karma or something as you can see I like some but not others of similar cultural groups so there must be something.
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But even in country where I must feel nice like Turkey (v similar to Bulgaria) I feel uneasy and like I wouldn't want to live there if you pay me, same with most of Spain. Portugal on the other hand I like a lot.
I guess locals there find me hotter or something. I can't understand how they can like me so much while in Prague and Dresden, two very similar cultures to Bratislava and Vienna respectively they were so standoffish to me. 
Other people have great time there, so it's not the place, it's the way it doesn't resonate with me personally. 
It helped me even at work, Slovakia was the 1st and so far only place where I got my probation shortened and got a full contract. I also made friends faster there than in Bulgaria! Of course with the good there was some not-so-good - drama, two fighting flatmates wanted me to take sides. 
