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Old 09-18-2017, 05:00 AM
 
5,110 posts, read 3,036,450 times
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Basically my story is a crime thriller where, the main character, a cop, wants to bring down the villains and of course resorts to unorthodox and desperate methods in order to so. He has to get evidence on the villains and in order to do that, he has to trick the villains into giving up evidence, and incriminating themselves. So he comes up with his own secret sting operation in order trick the villains into exposing themselves, with evidence.

However, part of the plan in order to manipulate the main villain leader, into doing certain things, is to make the villain believe that a group of vengeful cops are after him, to avenge a dead officer, that was killed earlier in the story.

The believe that a bunch of angry vengeful cops are out to kill him, will cause the villain to panic, and he will set forth a chain of events that will lead to his downfall, according to the hero's plan.

However, I am not sure how the hero would make the main villain believe, that a group of vengeful cops are out to kill him.

I mean I could have the hero kidnap one of the villain's associates, and force him at gunpoint to call the villain and say that a group of vengeful cops came after him, and threatened to kill him if he didn't talk, and then left after he didn't talk and acted like he didn't know anything.

But is that enough for the villain to believe him enough and be sent into a panic? Is there a better way to trick the villain into believing such a thing, without it getting too ridiculous or complicated?
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Old 09-18-2017, 04:04 PM
 
Location: Old Mother Idaho
29,169 posts, read 22,142,986 times
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Look into the way voodoo works.
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Old 09-18-2017, 05:43 PM
 
5,110 posts, read 3,036,450 times
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Lol well I am not going to use voodoo.
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Old 09-19-2017, 06:16 PM
 
Location: colorado springs, CO
9,512 posts, read 6,013,286 times
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Does the cop have knowledge or suspicion of specific evidence? Or is he just trying to get his hands on anything?

It may not have to be very complicated at all; there is a certain psychology between "cops & crooks", especially during the "discovery" period.

What typically happens when cops don't have everything needed for a strong case:

A person thought to be involved with, or have knowledge of criminal activity, is apprehended & detained for questioning (interrogation).

Obviously, denial of involvement or knowledge of, is the initial response. So the cop states that they already know that's BS & lies to the suspect: "We have it on video" ... or " Your DNA was found at the scene". They will name drop known associates of the suspect: " That's not what your partner Bubba told us; he ratted you out this morning!"

The suspect then changes strategy, especially if the cop starts to subtly align themselves with them: "Look, my partner & the DA? They want to throw the death penalty at you ... Me? I think you are being set up! Bubba just turned evidence on you because he's trying to get a deal ... Why should you take the fall for this? You need to help me help you ... tell me what you know, tell me your side of the story"

This is when the suspect, thinking he's got nothing left to lose, spills the beans. Only to find out once the trial starts that there never was a video, DNA or a confession from Bubba.

Basically, every person brought in for questioning when there is a dead cop? Already believes there are angry, vengeful cops out to get them. You wouldn't necessarily have to involve a staged abduction.

Don't know if this is helpful or not. Is there actually going to be a group of rouge cops in the story?
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Old 09-19-2017, 06:47 PM
 
Location: Old Mother Idaho
29,169 posts, read 22,142,986 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ironpony View Post
Lol well I am not going to use voodoo.
I didn't expect you would. But knowing how it works may be valuable to you with your character problem.
It does work, even if the person who's the object doesn't believe in it. But there have to be some elements that have to be used for it to work on a non-believer. That's the stuff that may be of value to you.
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:28 AM
 
Location: SoCal
14,530 posts, read 19,978,472 times
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Hey pony, publish the damned thing and let's discuss the sequel. You've written more on the forum than the whole screenplay. You are a wanna-be professional getting advice from mostly amateurs.

Shut down your browser and open your word processor.

These may seem unkind words but good advice anyway. Get on your big boy pants and start typing, and quit asking amateurs for their unskilled advice.

If you can't stand no advice then join a writers group. You're not going to get meaningful advice here on the forum, not after your 500th post on the same screenplay. I'm done.
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Old 09-20-2017, 12:58 AM
 
5,110 posts, read 3,036,450 times
Reputation: 1489
Quote:
Originally Posted by coschristi View Post
Does the cop have knowledge or suspicion of specific evidence? Or is he just trying to get his hands on anything?

It may not have to be very complicated at all; there is a certain psychology between "cops & crooks", especially during the "discovery" period.

What typically happens when cops don't have everything needed for a strong case:

A person thought to be involved with, or have knowledge of criminal activity, is apprehended & detained for questioning (interrogation).

Obviously, denial of involvement or knowledge of, is the initial response. So the cop states that they already know that's BS & lies to the suspect: "We have it on video" ... or " Your DNA was found at the scene". They will name drop known associates of the suspect: " That's not what your partner Bubba told us; he ratted you out this morning!"

The suspect then changes strategy, especially if the cop starts to subtly align themselves with them: "Look, my partner & the DA? They want to throw the death penalty at you ... Me? I think you are being set up! Bubba just turned evidence on you because he's trying to get a deal ... Why should you take the fall for this? You need to help me help you ... tell me what you know, tell me your side of the story"

This is when the suspect, thinking he's got nothing left to lose, spills the beans. Only to find out once the trial starts that there never was a video, DNA or a confession from Bubba.

Basically, every person brought in for questioning when there is a dead cop? Already believes there are angry, vengeful cops out to get them. You wouldn't necessarily have to involve a staged abduction.

Don't know if this is helpful or not. Is there actually going to be a group of rouge cops in the story?
The cop has has suspicion that the villain has such evidence cause the corrupt cop working for the villain told him he likely does, before he died, earlier in the story.

So the cop is acting on that. He cannot tell his superiors though that he is using the rouge cop as a trick to send the villain into a panic cause legally when a cop make a suspect out to believe that the police will harm him, then it's 'police coercion', and cannot be used in court. So the main character's way of tricking the villain to lead him to the evidence, he will have to deny doing, if the villain brings it up later, after he is arrested.

The villain of course cannot prove the main character is manipulating him, he can only guess that it's him. And yes there is a real group of rouge cops after the villains as well, which come after him later on, afterwards.
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Old 09-20-2017, 03:01 AM
 
Location: Old Mother Idaho
29,169 posts, read 22,142,986 times
Reputation: 23792
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lovehound View Post
Hey pony, publish the damned thing and let's discuss the sequel. You've written more on the forum than the whole screenplay. You are a wanna-be professional getting advice from mostly amateurs.

Shut down your browser and open your word processor.

These may seem unkind words but good advice anyway. Get on your big boy pants and start typing, and quit asking amateurs for their unskilled advice.

If you can't stand no advice then join a writers group. You're not going to get meaningful advice here on the forum, not after your 500th post on the same screenplay. I'm done.
You know how it is. You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink, even when you hold the bucket and make it easy for him.

Iron pony- you keep asking questions that only you can discover the answer to. I know it is very hard to come up with things like what you seek here, but none of us are writing your screenplay, and none of us have a nickel invested in it.
Lovehound is right- slam it out to the end, even if you know there are parts that are as rough as a cob. Make it all work, even if it's bad. You will have to force yourself to the finish or you will never finish at all.

We can't do it for you, no matter how many times you give us another synopsis. Non one can make it work but you alone. Only a complete first draft can teach you what you need, and you'll never get what you need here.

Lovehound is right about something else. Go find a writer's group, join it, and listen to them and learn from them. You will get 20 times more face to face with some other people as you will get here.
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Old 09-21-2017, 12:45 AM
 
Location: colorado springs, CO
9,512 posts, read 6,013,286 times
Reputation: 28830
Quote:
Originally Posted by ironpony View Post
The cop has has suspicion that the villain has such evidence cause the corrupt cop working for the villain told him he likely does, before he died, earlier in the story.

So the cop is acting on that. He cannot tell his superiors though that he is using the rouge cop as a trick to send the villain into a panic cause legally when a cop make a suspect out to believe that the police will harm him, then it's 'police coercion', and cannot be used in court. So the main character's way of tricking the villain to lead him to the evidence, he will have to deny doing, if the villain brings it up later, after he is arrested.

The villain of course cannot prove the main character is manipulating him, he can only guess that it's him. And yes there is a real group of rouge cops after the villains as well, which come after him later on, afterwards.
One more question... Does the villain know that the main character is a cop?

Things that might convince someone that the cops want him dead:

- hearing your name & address when a baby monitor intercepts a radio frequency/ dispatch channel

- you're jumped walking home one night by two guys wearing face masks & they leave you to die in an alley. Hours later you start to come to & the very first thing you see is a shiny ring wedged on the ground by the wall just inches from your bloody face that says " ... Fraternal Order of Police".

- your little girl isn't on the school bus to come home & you start frantically calling her friends parents trying to find her. Half an hour later there is a knock at your door & it's a cop with your daughter " She looked lost so I brought her home... You can't be too careful these days. There's a lot of weirdos out there ..."

I dunno; I wish I was better at writing. And fiction? Would be very difficult!
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Old 09-21-2017, 02:34 AM
 
5,110 posts, read 3,036,450 times
Reputation: 1489
Yeah I wrote most of the script and some revisions so far, but stuck on a few parts still. What is a writer's group exactly, like an online writers' forum?


Quote:
Originally Posted by coschristi View Post
One more question... Does the villain know that the main character is a cop?

Things that might convince someone that the cops want him dead:

- hearing your name & address when a baby monitor intercepts a radio frequency/ dispatch channel

- you're jumped walking home one night by two guys wearing face masks & they leave you to die in an alley. Hours later you start to come to & the very first thing you see is a shiny ring wedged on the ground by the wall just inches from your bloody face that says " ... Fraternal Order of Police".

- your little girl isn't on the school bus to come home & you start frantically calling her friends parents trying to find her. Half an hour later there is a knock at your door & it's a cop with your daughter " She looked lost so I brought her home... You can't be too careful these days. There's a lot of weirdos out there ..."

I dunno; I wish I was better at writing. And fiction? Would be very difficult!
Yes the villain knows the main character is a cop cause earlier in the story, the cop arrested one of the villain's gang members. The police couldn't make the case and ended up letting the guy go, but the villain leader, knows him from that.
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