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Cadillac Owner Stereotypes.

Posted 10-24-2019 at 02:44 PM by Nigel.Presnyakov

This is my revised version of the Top 10 Cadillac owner stereotypes thread I posted earlier. Disclaimer, I am currently driving a Cadillac DTS, and have owned several different Cadillac models prior. So you know this information is coming straight from the source. Some cars on this list are not Cadillacs but I did think they were relatively similar car companies. I apologize if I didn't include your Cadillac model. Enjoy

1) 1990-2000 Cadillac Eldorado, Seville, and Lincoln Towncar:
-An older white man, typically in his late 50's early 60's who retired early only to find out that his pension barely supports him and his wife. Typically his car is old and decrepit, with a lot of rust.
-A young black or white female from the hood with one or two young kids. Both have issues fighting with other females.
-An older black female who lives in the worst part of the hood. However everyone loves her and calls her mama, and she makes it her life mission to uphold her moral standards wherever she goes.

2) 2000-2005 Cadillac DeVille or Chrysler 300:
-Relatively well off senior citizen who could easily afford a new Cadillac but would rather keep their old DeVille because all the new models don't ride as smooth.
-White middle-aged drug dealer who wants to be gangster and pimp.
-Young white, or black teenager who inherited the car from a relative. They have no respect for the car and drive it like its a Lambo. The car usually breaks down within a year of them owning it.
-An overweight black man who always wears football jerseys and decides to buy new rims rather than fix its many mechanical issues. Most likely named the car “White Lightning”.

3) 2006-2011 Cadillac DTS:
-Typically an elderly woman or man who has finally upgraded from their El Dorado, Deville, Seville, Mercury, Buick, Crown VIC, or lincoln town car. Almost exclusively red or white paint job, super dirty trunk, and no tint on the windows. Rarely will you ever see this car outside of a church parking lot or breakfast restaurant.

4) Cadillac CTS:
-Anyone who wants's to own a Cadillac but does not want to have the stigma of driving a "grandpa car" attached to them.

5) Cadillac CTS-V:
-Rich teenage (could be any race) speedster who doesn't want to be basic by driving a Subaru WRX, but can't afford insurance on a BMW. They typically gut the car.

6) Cadillac XLR:
-Owned by the middle-aged uncle who wears a dollar sign clip-on tie, fake Rolex, and always has slick back helmet hair. Always addresses his nephew as “slick” and “Sport”.
-Also owned by 60+ mean who live in Florida, they wanted a sports car, but didn't want the harshness of a Corvette so they decided to get the XLR instead. They always blast 50's hits and drive unreasonably slow despite they're driving a sports car.

7) Early 2000's Cadillac Escalade:
-Mexican or black female who wants to be ghetto but can't afford a new escalade. Windows are illegally dark and there is rust on the bumpers. They do have really nice rims bought by their baby daddies. Almost always get repossessed.
-Middle Aged white female whose husband bought her the Escalade as an upgrade from the Tahoe only for the car to get absolutely demolished by kids.

8) New Cadillac Escalade or Cadillac XT6:
-Owned by a wealthy middle-aged black man who always wears white Adidas jumpers.
-Middle-aged white or Hispanic mom. Hispanic mom is definitely addicted to Marlboro lights, and white mom had never been seen without white wine. Both shop regularly at Target.

9) Cadillac SRX, XT5, XT4:
-Owned by either an overweight Mary Kay salesman with a southern accent.
-A 50+ white woman who uses the car to shop at Kohl's, play tennis, or go to the gold course. Both live primarily in Florida.
-It should be noted that both owners will undoubtedly say "Do you know who my husband is!" after getting pulled over for speeding passed a parked school bus.

10) Cadillac CTS Sports Wagon/Chevrolet El Camino:
-Owned by middle-aged bald men with face tattoos, and long scraggly goatees. They almost always have full sleeve tattoos and have a white trash girlfriend that they don't live with. Unlike many Cadillacs, the wagons ashtrays have most certainly been used. Think *Jackson Galaxy.
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