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Rating: 2 votes, 3.50 average.

Facing the reality of my mortality and inability to stop working

Posted 01-17-2024 at 09:33 AM by TNSLPPTSO13

Why do I still work?

Because for most of my life i ****ed up and failed
to save money...make money...spent too much on gambling and buying records.

I really can't blame myself totally...came from relatively low middle class,parents had third grade education...not a whole lot of family to get good role models/connections from...severe issues with self-confidence,self-steem,ashamed of what I looked like for most of my life.;thus no relationships whatsover...no friends...very little family left...inability to socialize.

Furthermore;I hate my life basically....and now I am sicker than I've ever been. Just started chemo...after 20 years of treatment,still have chronic HBP,diabetes,neuropathy in my legs that has limited me to basically be a shut-in...Yet I still have to work.

I am still in debt >57K....plus incurring new medical debt as my treatments progress and Medicare does not cover everything...Just started Part C coverage;which may help with the co-payments and deductibles.

Frankly,I hate my job too...Nothing really left for me to do since after 45 years working at the same place,the Company was sold and I'm basically sitting down 8-10 hrs. a day browsing the Internet;as the new regime has no use for me...My job was eliminated...but I still may have a job after all until the old owner is out of his contract with the new regime(maybe another year).

When I lose my job,I won't be able to work again..feel too weak...too useless...All I want to do is sleep...

I can live very frugally with what I get from SS,but I will not be able to make payments on any debt.

That's why I'm still working at age 67.

Sudden death would be a relief.
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