Why do I not want to be a cop?
Posted 04-25-2012 at 04:47 PM by txtqueen
When I became an explorer I got interested in law enforcement.
I wanted to learn how to become a cop so that I could be that power, that force that steps in when something is going on and says this isn't ok and that I help the people in need and make them feel safe again.
After issues with my mom and a recent issue with the police I have lost all faith in law enforcement. I cannot bring myself to work with people who have become so calloused and stoic from years on the job, nor do I want to become a cop and become one of those people and lose sight on what I was became one for.
I also realized that cops hands are so tied, there usually is very little they can do and the things they can do usually cause more trouble for people than is needed.
The main thing that led to me not wanting to be a cop anymore is something that happened back in February.
TG was dealing with crap at work.
I was dealing with legal issues with a friend and we both we're stressed to the max and just wanted away. So one Wednesday night after work, I got off at 11 and headed over to TG's who had been sent home from work early and then spent the rest of the day in bed miserable because of why he got sent home. (He had two customers in line with babies, two moms meeting for lunch, one mom bailed on the other mom and left to seat herself and her child, leaving the other mother to carry ALL the food and her child, TG kindly picked up their tray took it to the table and set it down for them. He in turn got yelled at for it because his GM told his it was a "bad decision")
He had been laying in bed watching tv drinking beer, he said he wanted to go up to the mountains and just get away. I wanted to as well I spent most the night crying at work because of the friend who tried to press felony charges on me. We we're both miserable. So we headed up to the mountains, didn't fill up before we left and all I had was my grandmothers gas card on me, I was suppose to get my check the next day.
Anyways, as I was driving up the mountain I started to try and find a shell gas station and couldn't find one, about georgetown I pulled off at an exit, changed in my car, found a shell station at the next exit and got back on the road and went to that station.
Then upon arriving could not find the gas card, started rapidly searching for it and couldn't find it, then finally found it and tried to pump. It didn't work, I tried 3 different pumps, none of them worked. Little did I know since I was using the card so far away from where it is typically used it flagged it as fraud, called my grandmother who is an hour ahead and she was asleep so she couldn't tell them it was ok. Proceed to me FREAKING OUT. Its below freezing, I'm half-assed dress in jeans and a hoodie and FLIP FLOPS, all I had in my car, my gas light was on, I'm looking at the mountains unrationally thinking about what might come attack and eat us and I get back in the car put the card down and then when I go to drive over to the other gas station because TG thinks he has a few dollars left on his card, I don't see the card when I put the car into gear, proceed to me stopping AGAIN, FREAKING OUT again, TG went over to the drivers side to look for me while I calmed down and stopped throwing **** looking for my card. He's sitting in the drivers seat, no intention to drive at all since he had been drinking.
Here's the kicker, a car starts to pull in behind us, TG see's said car and since we're currently blocking two pumps at once pulls the car up 3 GODDAMNED FEET and gets a DUI for it. 3 ****ING FEET at a CLOSED gas station(the pumps were on), in the MIDDLE of the night, with no one around. That's not DUI worthy. But no the law is black and white, with no compassion and discretion.
Oh and these wonderful members of law enforcement didn't even ask if we needed help, he only asked TG how much he had to drink. Lovely officer if you had nothing better to do than to watch us to harass us you would have seen that I WAS THE EFFING DRIVER, no no, lets not get the facts first.
Its total BS, we're fighting it and I lost ALL respect for law enforcement and realized something huge. I have tickets I can't afford to pay off all at once, my registration was $300, I could not ticket people for things like that because I know how hard it is to pay them off or be able to afford them. If someones tags were expired how do I know why they can't afford it, it may be because they spend their money on drugs, it may be because they have a very sick child and their house is getting foreclosed on and money is tight and food for the family trumped car registration. Then all the fines that come along with being late and such. It's all a giant way for the government to make money off the people.
Yes, there are still the cops out there who do a good job, they save lives and keep people safe but they are too few and far between for me to even want to try and work with them. I don't want to be any part of the cruel, cold callousedness that most officers become.
I rather put my knowledge and compassion to better use and do something that really matters, something that impacts the lives of others for the better, some that really lets people know that there is someone out there who cares and is there for them.
I've run through massage therapist (make the world a more relaxed and pain free place.)
Teacher (mold the minds of kids, teach them in a way they learn, make an impact on how they see education.)
Criminal defense attorney. (Some people are in the wrong place at the wrong time, they get wrongly blamed. They are being falsely accused. Whatever. They need protecting too. Someone needs to be there for them to make sure they have a fair trial, that the facts are all correct and found in a lawful manner and help get the truly innocent people out of the situations they find themselves in.
So that is why I do not want to be a cop any longer.
Yes, I am sad that I won't be but the system I once believed in has shown me it's ugly side, and I can't enforce something I don't think is just and right.
I wanted to learn how to become a cop so that I could be that power, that force that steps in when something is going on and says this isn't ok and that I help the people in need and make them feel safe again.
After issues with my mom and a recent issue with the police I have lost all faith in law enforcement. I cannot bring myself to work with people who have become so calloused and stoic from years on the job, nor do I want to become a cop and become one of those people and lose sight on what I was became one for.
I also realized that cops hands are so tied, there usually is very little they can do and the things they can do usually cause more trouble for people than is needed.
The main thing that led to me not wanting to be a cop anymore is something that happened back in February.
TG was dealing with crap at work.
I was dealing with legal issues with a friend and we both we're stressed to the max and just wanted away. So one Wednesday night after work, I got off at 11 and headed over to TG's who had been sent home from work early and then spent the rest of the day in bed miserable because of why he got sent home. (He had two customers in line with babies, two moms meeting for lunch, one mom bailed on the other mom and left to seat herself and her child, leaving the other mother to carry ALL the food and her child, TG kindly picked up their tray took it to the table and set it down for them. He in turn got yelled at for it because his GM told his it was a "bad decision")
He had been laying in bed watching tv drinking beer, he said he wanted to go up to the mountains and just get away. I wanted to as well I spent most the night crying at work because of the friend who tried to press felony charges on me. We we're both miserable. So we headed up to the mountains, didn't fill up before we left and all I had was my grandmothers gas card on me, I was suppose to get my check the next day.
Anyways, as I was driving up the mountain I started to try and find a shell gas station and couldn't find one, about georgetown I pulled off at an exit, changed in my car, found a shell station at the next exit and got back on the road and went to that station.
Then upon arriving could not find the gas card, started rapidly searching for it and couldn't find it, then finally found it and tried to pump. It didn't work, I tried 3 different pumps, none of them worked. Little did I know since I was using the card so far away from where it is typically used it flagged it as fraud, called my grandmother who is an hour ahead and she was asleep so she couldn't tell them it was ok. Proceed to me FREAKING OUT. Its below freezing, I'm half-assed dress in jeans and a hoodie and FLIP FLOPS, all I had in my car, my gas light was on, I'm looking at the mountains unrationally thinking about what might come attack and eat us and I get back in the car put the card down and then when I go to drive over to the other gas station because TG thinks he has a few dollars left on his card, I don't see the card when I put the car into gear, proceed to me stopping AGAIN, FREAKING OUT again, TG went over to the drivers side to look for me while I calmed down and stopped throwing **** looking for my card. He's sitting in the drivers seat, no intention to drive at all since he had been drinking.
Here's the kicker, a car starts to pull in behind us, TG see's said car and since we're currently blocking two pumps at once pulls the car up 3 GODDAMNED FEET and gets a DUI for it. 3 ****ING FEET at a CLOSED gas station(the pumps were on), in the MIDDLE of the night, with no one around. That's not DUI worthy. But no the law is black and white, with no compassion and discretion.
Oh and these wonderful members of law enforcement didn't even ask if we needed help, he only asked TG how much he had to drink. Lovely officer if you had nothing better to do than to watch us to harass us you would have seen that I WAS THE EFFING DRIVER, no no, lets not get the facts first.
Its total BS, we're fighting it and I lost ALL respect for law enforcement and realized something huge. I have tickets I can't afford to pay off all at once, my registration was $300, I could not ticket people for things like that because I know how hard it is to pay them off or be able to afford them. If someones tags were expired how do I know why they can't afford it, it may be because they spend their money on drugs, it may be because they have a very sick child and their house is getting foreclosed on and money is tight and food for the family trumped car registration. Then all the fines that come along with being late and such. It's all a giant way for the government to make money off the people.
Yes, there are still the cops out there who do a good job, they save lives and keep people safe but they are too few and far between for me to even want to try and work with them. I don't want to be any part of the cruel, cold callousedness that most officers become.
I rather put my knowledge and compassion to better use and do something that really matters, something that impacts the lives of others for the better, some that really lets people know that there is someone out there who cares and is there for them.
I've run through massage therapist (make the world a more relaxed and pain free place.)
Teacher (mold the minds of kids, teach them in a way they learn, make an impact on how they see education.)
Criminal defense attorney. (Some people are in the wrong place at the wrong time, they get wrongly blamed. They are being falsely accused. Whatever. They need protecting too. Someone needs to be there for them to make sure they have a fair trial, that the facts are all correct and found in a lawful manner and help get the truly innocent people out of the situations they find themselves in.
So that is why I do not want to be a cop any longer.
Yes, I am sad that I won't be but the system I once believed in has shown me it's ugly side, and I can't enforce something I don't think is just and right.
Total Comments 79
Comments
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Dude was driving a motor vehicle drunk.
In a gas station. (Last time I looked gas is still flammable.)
Flunked his lawfully administered blood test.
Bust his drunken butt and give him his day in court.Posted 04-26-2012 at 05:59 PM by DewDropInn
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His blood alcohol level was above the legal limit, and he was operating the motor vehicle. Thank goodness you are not a cop if you are going to interpret the law a la TxtPosted 04-26-2012 at 06:01 PM by Zimbochick
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We've already been to court once on Tuesday.Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
Dude was driving a motor vehicle drunk.
In a gas station. (Last time I looked gas is still flammable.)
Flunked his lawfully administered blood test.
Bust his drunken butt and give him his day in court.
He is getting a public defender and we go back next month on the 30th.
He's going to win this case.Posted 04-26-2012 at 06:13 PM by txtqueen
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Another reason not to plan to sleep in your car. Sounds like you could have gotten a DUI too. I hope TG is able to get the charges dropped and that you both learned a few lessons.Quote:Originally Posted by txtqueen
In colorado you can be
A) in the passenger seat of the car with the keys in the ignition and get a DUI.
B)In your back seat with the keys anywhere near you and get a DUI.
Basically in colorado all you have to do is be in possession of the keys and in the vehicle to get a dui, he technically was both but wasn't driving, which is stupid he was not driving and did not plan to drive from the gas station.Posted 04-26-2012 at 06:22 PM by JustJulia
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I wasn't drunk or anywhere close.Quote:Originally Posted by JustJulia
Another reason not to plan to sleep in your car. Sounds like you could have gotten a DUI too. I hope TG is able to get the charges dropped and that you both learned a few lessons.
I had to do a PBT(portable breath test) to be allowed to drive my car from the gas station to the police station.
Which is why they could have just let him go and me drive home.Posted 04-26-2012 at 06:27 PM by txtqueen
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Ah, I misunderstood your explanation of what can get you a DUI. But please don't plan to sleep in the freezing cold again. That should never be considered as an option.Posted 04-26-2012 at 07:16 PM by JustJulia
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Well damn there goes that naked sleeping bag trick...Quote:Originally Posted by JustJulia
Ah, I misunderstood your explanation of what can get you a DUI. But please don't plan to sleep in the freezing cold again. That should never be considered as an option.Posted 04-26-2012 at 08:12 PM by txtqueen
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Which tells us he's flat busted broke and possibly facing jail time.Quote:Originally Posted by txtqueen
We've already been to court once on Tuesday.
He is getting a public defender and we go back next month on the 30th.
Good luck.Posted 04-26-2012 at 08:50 PM by DewDropInn
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He's not flat busted broke but I did a lot of calling around for a lawyer for him and they are VERY pricey when it comes to getting a DUI lawyer.Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
Which tells us he's flat busted broke and possibly facing jail time.
Good luck.
And no he isn't if he takes a plea there's no jail time, if he takes it to court and wins he's all good. If he takes it to court and loses and takes no plea he does 10 days, which isn't all that much and he probably won't have to do all 10 since he wouldn't misbehave.
We've already talked to the DA.
The ONLY reason he wants to take this to court is because he IS innocent, he doesn't want this on his record and he doesn't want to take a stupid plea and have to do probation for 2 years. He wants this to just be done and over with.
If he gets a plea where he gets no probation, no jail time, then he'll take it but if they wont offer him a plea he likes he taking it to court and risking 10 days in jail.Posted 04-26-2012 at 09:20 PM by txtqueen
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He got that public defender because he's indigent. Meaning he's flat busted broke. (Or else he lied on the forms he filled out.) It's being paid for because the government of the United States (which you've been complaining about lately) has a law that says he gets a lawyer whether he can afford one or not.
You might want to give a big Thank You shout-out to the taxpayers of the state of Colorado.Posted 04-28-2012 at 10:10 PM by DewDropInn
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*sighs* There is a HUGE difference between being flat busted broke and not being able to shell out a **** ton of money to a DUI lawyer.Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
He got that public defender because he's indigent. Meaning he's flat busted broke. (Or else he lied on the forms he filled out.) It's being paid for because the government of the United States (which you've been complaining about lately) has a law that says he gets a lawyer whether he can afford one or not.
You might want to give a big Thank You shout-out to the taxpayers of the state of Colorado.
A lot of the DUI lawyers I talked to wanted like $4,000 down and the rest in payments. No one I know my age has $4,000 laying around to shell out to anything.
He makes about what I make, that's not enough to be able to afford an attorney.
When you pretty much live paycheck to paycheck with a couple hundred and savings thats not enough. He is making use of his resources.
I have money but it is for our move, which is VERY VERY soon.
The rent is reasonable and if he does go to jail for the 10 days, I can afford it on my own till he is out, which won't be all that long, not even long enough and we're moving in before his next court date and it's awesome that we will be living with his sister because then I will have support and someone there to help me through him being gone because I will be sad and it will be hard but that's worst case scenario, he won't go to jail and I know it, he'll get a slap on the wrist and some plea bargain and we'll be free to start the next step in our relationship. I am finally happy, I am finally getting my stuff out of my moms house and I will have a place to call my own and he and I can finally live normally with out all the sneaking around his roommate and the constant stress she causes. I will be living somewhere paying rent, paying for my stuff and contributing to a household.
Be happy for me and quit being negative. I love him and he loves me and we're about to be very very happy with our lives.Posted 04-29-2012 at 01:37 AM by txtqueen
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If that means an end to the incessant whining about how awful your life is and how unfair it is and how everyone else gets all the "breaks" and "luck" except you, then good. Just know, that unless you choose to do something to improve your situation, and follow up with it and make the sacrifices to acheive a goal, you'll still be living in someone else's basement in a year, or 5 years. Nothing wrong with using it as a stepping stone but your history shows that you are not willing to stick with a bit of unpleasantness or hardship for the sake of the future. Living for today and all that.Quote:Be happy for me and quit being negative. I love him and he loves me and we're about to be very very happy with our lives.Posted 04-29-2012 at 10:10 AM by maciesmom
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Hippies don't tell other people how to think and feel.Quote:Originally Posted by txtqueen
quit being negative.
What happened to everybody doing their own thing?
Whatever.
Two questions:
Does he have any priors and does his public defender eat lunch with the District Attorney?Posted 04-29-2012 at 11:14 AM by DewDropInn
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Hey you're projecting negativeness onto me....wait...did you just call me a hippie?Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
Hippies don't tell other people how to think and feel.
What happened to everybody doing their own thing?
Whatever.
Two questions:
Does he have any priors and does his public defender eat lunch with the District Attorney?
Anyways, you're projecting negativeness onto me which is causing me to feel negative. Why not just be proud that TG and I are taking the next step, that I am finally moving out of my mom's and that I will finally be independent, living on my own, renting, paying bills, living like an adult.Posted 04-29-2012 at 11:19 AM by txtqueen
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No. I was illustrating another example of your very un-hippie-ish way of thinking and behavior. If you were a hippie you would never have THOUGHT of telling me how to think. Just guiding you on the path to true hippiness and enlightenment. Your journey will be far.
You are responsible for your own happiness, txtqueen. Good karma comes from within. Not from others.Posted 04-29-2012 at 11:38 AM by DewDropInn
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Wait, so you're trying to show me the path to hippiness??Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
No. I was illustrating another example of your very un-hippie-ish way of thinking and behavior. If you were a hippie you would never have THOUGHT of telling me how to think. Just guiding you on the path to true hippiness and enlightenment. Your journey will be far.
You are responsible for your own happiness, txtqueen. Good karma comes from within. Not from others.
Sorry I got like 4 hours of sleep, I can't comprehend much right now?
Does that mean you are a hippie if you're trying to show me the way?Posted 04-29-2012 at 11:58 AM by txtqueen
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Whether or not I am a hippie should not matter to you.
And, no, I am not trying to show you the way because I cannot show you the way. Your vibes are off. Sorry.
Learn to forgive. Start with your mother. I CAN tell you that is the first step.Posted 04-29-2012 at 12:10 PM by DewDropInn
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Well I was just curious. It wouldn't shock me it makes sense with my mental image of you.Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
Whether or not I am a hippie should not matter to you.
And, no, I am not trying to show you the way because I cannot show you the way. Your vibes are off. Sorry.
Learn to forgive. Start with your mother. I CAN tell you that is the first step.
Anyways. No, I don't want to forgive her. I will forget, put it out of my mind but I refuse to forgive, I can't forgive someone while they still are doing the same things that hurt me in the past.Posted 04-29-2012 at 12:45 PM by txtqueen
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I really, truly hope some day you'll learn that forgiveness is the greatest gift you can give YOURSELF.Quote:Originally Posted by txtqueen
Anyways. No, I don't want to forgive her. I will forget, put it out of my mind but I refuse to forgive, I can't forgive someone while they still are doing the same things that hurt me in the past.Posted 04-29-2012 at 08:00 PM by DewDropInn
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Why? Forgiveness is letting the things in the past go. Those things in the past are why I am the way I am today.Quote:Originally Posted by DewDropInn
I really, truly hope some day you'll learn that forgiveness is the greatest gift you can give YOURSELF.
TG helped me pick out some shorts at the mall last night. I have no summer clothes that fit me (all too big) from all the weight loss and Thursday we are packing up my room and I am taking all my old clothes to Platos Closet and getting money for them. Anyways, I am done to a size 4, I am 125, so I am pretty thin now but mentally I am not over it, I see myself in the mirror as pretty skinny but whenever I wear clothes that are things skinny people can pull off I still feel fat when I wear them.
I got a new pair of white denim shorts in a size 4. I thought they were too short because I still have this mind set of nothing looks good on me in my head, (TG is aware of the emotional damage done by my mom) and it took him convincing me to leave the store and then a few hours of him telling me I looked fine and to stop being ridiculous. I was in his room looking in the mirror and he told me "those look really good on you" and I was like "yes I love these shorts, you were right." He asked me what my mom would say about them and I replied with phrases I've heard her say before in my best voice to mimick her and when I stopped he looked at me and was like "are you ok?" and I was like "yeah, she really ****ed me up didn't she".
I obviously am not over it, I am not over the things what were said or done and until I am I can't forgive her. Until I am ok with myself and I get it in my head that I am not who she thinks I am, I am not all the names she's called me I simply can't get over it.Posted 05-01-2012 at 03:42 PM by txtqueen
