According to today's newspaper, Bethlehem has the third highest median income in the Capital District, at $87,000. Since crime and school rankings are mostly a function of income, you don't have much to worry about in in Bethlehem in terms of crime and school reputation.
Eagle Elementary is only a few years old, so it has a decent physical facility. I know several families that now go to Eagle, and they actually like it better than the other Bethlehem elementary schools they were formerly zoned for. Because it is new, and the families previously came from several different elementary schools, there is no ingrained PTA culture of doing things a certain way, with certain families always dictating what happens. as I understand is sometimes a problem at some of the other schools. I've heard that the classes are larger than in some of the other schools, but the Capital District tends to have smaller class sizes than in many other parts of the country, so they are still manageable.
Because Bethlehem is both a relatively wealthy and highly educated community (lots of PhD, MDs and JDs live there), it can be more competitive than some other districts. I don't think you need to worry about your 6 year old feeling that though - it doesn't compare to, say, private school in New York City. At that age, the competition tends to be among the moms. However, if you are the sort of person who can let that sort of thing slide off your back, you should be fine.
Bethlehem High School has a reputation for drug use. Students at my kid's "bad" high school, Albany High, assume that if a classmate is going to a weekend party in Bethlehem, it is to get access to drugs. I have never heard of any similar problems in the Bethlehem elementary schools, though.
One of the best places in Delmar for families is the
5 Rivers Environmental Education Center. It offers tons of programs all year long, most of which are free or low-cost. You can also visit just to hike and use their small nature center. The
Bethlehem Public Library is very good, with lots of programs for kids and families. A library card from Bethlehem allows you to use any public library in Albany and Rensselaer Counties. I don't know anything about Raleigh's public library system, but friends and family who have moved to NC and other southern states from the Capital District often complain about how much they miss the good libraries in the Capital District.
The
Mohawk-Hudson Land Conservancy has several pieces of property in Bethlehem. These are all small and have easy hiking trails suitable for little ones. There is a lot for families to do in the area. As another poster mentioned, the recent post about moving from Hawaii has many more suggestions.
There is a CVS on Delaware Ave in Delmar that has a 24 hour pharmacy.