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If you have never been desperate enough, if you have not lived in a communist country with a rationing card and a world of "daily nothingness", you can't judge them.
That would be foolish.
As Oscar Wilde said in "Pigmalion", "morals are for rich people".
What other disgraceful things? No other disgraceful things.
Morals, please...jaja, good one.
What morals do people have to take advantage of poverty and misery to obtain women they could never have in their countries?
Morals is a two edge weapon.
There's a book out of the reach of Cubans during 40 years that says: "Don't judge and you will not be judged".
I 100% agree with the area I highlighted red. This also exactly hits the inspiration for this thread on the nail. On one hand I blame the foreign person more for their readiness to exploit someone's else's situation, but not all people that lack money sink to lower themselves to this level. There are always choices in life and we all bare the conciquences for our choices. No matter how far people that do things like this think they will be able to climb up in life ... people like me and believe me there are many will always look down upon them and will happily slam every window and door in their face ! People that are desperate are usually the most dangerous as they typically don't have as much to loose. I have absolute respect for hard working descent people who are trying to get by. Often taking a huge short cut to get somewhere desirable faster just make your a rotten person. Rotten to the core.
These kind of conversations get kind of boring and one sided when people keep on getting band/ kicked off for being forward about their perspective. Pinsapo ... I am guessing you got in hot water over something you said somewhere on city data forum and now all your comments were removed. Disappointing as they seemed legitimate. Even though I was not a fan of the actions and mindset of people that you were describing I thought it was all good information to take in to consideration. Thank you for sharing your experiences and honest opinion. A real opinion even if very different is more meaningful than someone nodding and grinning along or ignoring a topic all together.
American (or Western men) are constantly complaining about American (or Western women) being less desirable that foreign women. And then they list the following reasons: less feminine, career-oriented, less-family oriented, etc.
But what many of the men complaining NEVER acknowledge is that Western men collectively are NOT allowing Western women to be these ultra-soft, feminine, financially provided for, 1950s housewife types who graduate from high school and are married within the next year. The average American guy in his early 20s in 2016 lacks maturity and has NO desire to be a strong head of household who financially provides for a stay at home wife no matter how beautiful the woman happens to be. It happens but not as often as in decades past.
[quote=calipoppy;43898401]I NEVER understand these discussions....
American (or Western men) are constantly complaining about American (or Western women) being less desirable that foreign women. And then they list the following reasons: less feminine, career-oriented, less-family oriented, etc.
But what many of the men complaining NEVER acknowledge is that Western men collectively are NOT allowing Western women to be these ultra-soft, feminine, financially provided for, 1950s housewife types who graduate from high school and are married within the next year. The average American guy in his early 20s in 2016 lacks maturity and has NO desire to be a strong head of household who financially provides for a stay at home wife no matter how beautiful the woman happens to be. It happens but not as often as in decades past.[/QUOTE
Wow. I could not have said it better. What ends up happening is that many if not most want to mess around until their like 40 often living with their parents. They often have no desire to actually get married and have a family until they are in their late 30s or 40s and then expect a female in their early to mid 20s that is educated and likely has pretty good career prospects to want to marry them and then gamble on if he will actually stick around or end up leaving her with kids and no career to fall back on. Also in reality you marry a man that is 10 years or more older the chances of you being a widow when your in your 60s starts to bump up hugely.
I often find at least where I am from men are more then happy to have you as a girl freind, but next to never want to step up to the plate and get married and have a family in their 20s. They end up stringing women along and make them feel like they are trying to trap them.
When I was a teenager I was the super sweet, feminine type girl ... liked to cooked, very family orientated and was totally keen on getting married and having a family of my own. I also had many guys around my age or slightly older wanting to date me. I eventually ended up seriously dating one that was like 3 years older. I was in high school he was in college (which takes like 2 years to complete) when we started dating. Both of us still living with our parents which is to be expected. Three later this guy still has not finished college, which he should have been able to have complete by the time I meet him and I am finishing my first year of university. After 3 years never did the topic of getting married or having kids come up.... ever. So having some common sense I figured I can invest my future in the hopes that someone else is going to take care of me. That relationship ended and I put moe focus on school and being able to get a good job instead of just waiting around to find a guy here that wanted to get married and have kids because no matter where I looked or even from feedback from my freind these men that wanted to get married and have kids were no where to be found. There were plenty of men that wanted to date or fooling around with you though. I also was not willing to date someone > 10 years older than me as frankly I would feel expolited as this person obviously had more life experience, resources and the balance of power in the relation would be way too uneven.
So what happens if you want to survive you adapt. I know too many guys that says that nonsense about women in Canada and the USA and frankly if they would get their own lives together a little faster then women in these places would not actually find ways to get buy without them and could sit around like pretty little cupcakes and be housewives.
I also find me from other places outside Canada and the USA more focused earlier on the idea of finding a wife. This also might be a major city issues as at times I do hear that men in both these countries in smaller communities get married younger.
Wow. I could not have said it better. What ends up happening is that many if not most want to mess around until their like 40 often living with their parents. They often have no desire to actually get married and have a family until they are in their late 30s or 40s and then expect a female in their early to mid 20s that is educated and likely has pretty good career prospects to want to marry them and then gamble on if he will actually stick around or end up leaving her with kids and no career to fall back on. Also in reality you marry a man that is 10 years or more older the chances of you being a widow when your in your 60s starts to bump up hugely.
I often find at least where I am from men are more then happy to have you as a girl freind, but next to never want to step up to the plate and get married and have a family in their 20s. They end up stringing women along and make them feel like they are trying to trap them.
When I was a teenager I was the super sweet, feminine type girl ... liked to cooked, very family orientated and was totally keen on getting married and having a family of my own. I also had many guys around my age or slightly older wanting to date me. I eventually ended up seriously dating one that was like 3 years older. I was in high school he was in college (which takes like 2 years to complete) when we started dating. Both of us still living with our parents which is to be expected. Three later this guy still has not finished college, which he should have been able to have complete by the time I meet him and I am finishing my first year of university. After 3 years never did the topic of getting married or having kids come up.... ever. So having some common sense I figured I can invest my future in the hopes that someone else is going to take care of me. That relationship ended and I put moe focus on school and being able to get a good job instead of just waiting around to find a guy here that wanted to get married and have kids because no matter where I looked or even from feedback from my freind these men that wanted to get married and have kids were no where to be found. There were plenty of men that wanted to date or fooling around with you though. I also was not willing to date someone > 10 years older than me as frankly I would feel expolited as this person obviously had more life experience, resources and the balance of power in the relation would be way too uneven.
So what happens if you want to survive you adapt. I know too many guys that says that nonsense about women in Canada and the USA and frankly if they would get their own lives together a little faster then women in these places would not actually find ways to get buy without them and could sit around like pretty little cupcakes and be housewives.
I also find me from other places outside Canada and the USA more focused earlier on the idea of finding a wife. This also might be a major city issues as at times I do hear that men in both these countries in smaller communities get married younger.
Amen.
I am really, REALLY tired of the "Land of Perpetual Pretty Perky Frisky Fembot Virgins" myth that Western men spin for one another. And also, the truth remains that MOST women in the world want men within their own age group and not 10, 15, 20+ years older.
But I do take issue with Western men who have two separate standards for women and our "motivations". So a woman in the US or Canada who wants to quit her job/career to be a stay-at-home wife who cooks and cleans is a lazy, selfish gold digger. However, a foreign woman who never had an opportunity to have a career and is a stay-at-home wife is somehow a domestic goddess to be revered above all working womankind.
Lastly, I wish that Western men would stop labeling ALL Western women as angry, bitter, feminists just because we have to have jobs to support ourselves/pay rent/pay mortgages/etc. as to not have resort to working in houses of ill repute because we didn't get married at age 19.
So back to the original thread topic...women from 3rd world countries have a different motivation when it comes to marriage to US/Canadian men. Not judging it as 'good' or 'bad'...just different. But I think that the waters get muddied by Western men who are not honest with themselves about the motivations of women from the 3rd world. If you are a socially awkward introvert (or an abusive controlling type) to women in the US/Canada, then you are still seen the same way to women of the 3rd world BUT the women in the 3rd world countries see that man as an opportunity to improve the financial situation of herself and her family so she will take the risk. No matter how these men want to rationalize it; money is ALWAYS the main motivator.
Thank you for sharing that because that is hitting what I meant by creating this thread on the nail. I could not have said it better. Maybe that 19 year old who comes from a poor family is okay with marrying that 70 year old man from Canada or the USA because she hopes she will only have to put up with him for a few decade then she will still have a chance to help her family out and possibly marry someone else when he kicks the bucket.
The delusions of men are mind blowing. If as a man you would not want someone significantly older then you ... why would a woman? If it seems to good to be true it is probably is. If your ambush ions are not good and exploitive then you deserve what you get when that young bride milks you for whatever she can get out of you, has a younger man on the side and leaves you when you least expect it. You reap what you sow.
This is also a significant issue with these same Canadian or American men is that while they where aimlessly chasing around the same smaller pool of girls only to fool around with the smarter girls where getting educations and are significant absorbed some of their job prospects. Simple example is that in Canada now the number if women enrolled in certain higher paying job training areas are women ex medical school. You can have that power trip attitude in a relationship if the woman is making as much or way more then you. Why would anyone put up with that? She is going to want to be treated with more regard and respect. Once I hit my early 20s and realized I was actually smarter and more ambitioush then many of these guys that wanted to date me I was not dumb enough to just be sitting around twirling my hair waiting for them to fool around with me while they drifted around just trying to have sex with any pretty girl that passed by.
And before anyone drums up the oh well that is why your single and don't have kids ... Actually 100% not true in my case as I met someone with a different mentality outside of these 2 countries and took care of all those 1 or 2 years after finishing university and thank god as these same men are entering their 40s now
... No wife, no kids, not even often with a career or finances to explain what they devoted the last 20 years of their life to building and then they have the never to cry about how women in these places are to cold and not feminine and they need to go somewhere else to find a wife? Connect the dots already. You helped create the problem and now you cry about it? The women here have even up hope in you long ago because when you had the chance with one or two if them you blow it!!! You got greedy or lazy and you blow it!
To these men that fall in to these category in Canada and the USA my message to you is that thanks for messing things up!!! Your carefully aimless behaviour has created for problems for women in there places then yourselves as because of that ****** called biology they get left out in the cold ex missing out on the chance of having family.
Actually from personal experience like girls from Latin America are the ones who want to get married mad early. I met so many who were like 20 years old and already wanted to get married with their boyfriend and I was shocked since I'm 20 and don't want to get married for 20 more years!!! Well it depends on the city too, cause Lima was very liberal so most girls want to get married much later and seem very independent
I think it's too crazy to date someone significantly out of your age range, one time I dated a girl who was 25 and it didn't workout well at all since we had completely different goals and wants, so age makes a huge difference. I never get 70 year old guys who marry 20 year olds, it's kinda gross
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I admire Latinas because pretty much all are not ashamed to be Latino. Unlike a lot of Asian women out there who have to be " whitish" to fit in socially and climb the social ladder.
Actually from personal experience like girls from Latin America are the ones who want to get married mad early. I met so many who were like 20 years old and already wanted to get married with their boyfriend and I was shocked since I'm 20 and don't want to get married for 20 more years!!! Well it depends on the city too, cause Lima was very liberal so most girls want to get married much later and seem very independent
On a side note I wonder if they are really in a rush to get married and have a family or just think that is the only way to get out of their parents house. I think when I was around that age I thought that getting married was the only way to be an adult. I needed to find a husband so I could move out. Then I realized wait a minute .... I could just go away for school or leave the country for a few months to work and my family could not have me under their thumb then ! I think girls that age need to realize at least in Canada and the USA in major cities now prince charming might not be coming and if he does he might need about around a decade to get himself together before he is ready to get married. He might still be under the evil enchanted spell of immaturity ! If you think I am exagerating when Disney starts to give up on the female princess/ character waiting for a prince to come save her you know the situation is the real deal lol !
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! People that are desperate are usually the most dangerous as they typically don't have as much to loose. I have absolute respect for hard working descent people who are trying to get by. Often taking a huge short cut to get somewhere desirable faster just make your a rotten person. Rotten to the core.
Exactly ......
or leave the country for a few months to work and my family could not have me under their thumb then 
! If you think I am exagerating when Disney starts to give up on the female princess/ character waiting for a prince to come save her you know the situation is the real deal lol 
