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Basically, you have to determine where she really is at. If she's in the Metro or in the province. The place is one factor in thinking how you should know her. Like for me,i am from the North i've also lived in Metro manila for few years before i move to the US,you might want to Court her first- courting means telling how you feel face to face (yes, you have to meet her) or have you two already met? Or you might want to call her directly in the phone. Ways that you can be in touch with each other with a whip of being personal. Meeting the girl first is the first in courting.
Then, she will be the one who will introduce you to her parents. How do this happen? She will hint going to her house-- either its because its her mom's birthday or its christmas or something like that. If no hint came, you should initiate the desire to meet her parents. Meeting the parents signifies that you are serious in your relationship or at least to her. This is the stage also where the parents can judge if you are a good man whom they can entrust their 'princess'. Bringing flowers and gifts is okay but need not be expensive. Like cakes or fruits. Forget the "GOAT" or any other cattles..haha--
After meeting with her Dad,and with her since you said she's coming to the US for visit, and if you think the Dad approve of you, you can start the courting proper. Like calling her, texting messages... going to the movies if she like or helping out with her family during occasions.
Ask for the status of your relationship. We girls are embarrassed to ask this directly you know. Asking simple questions like "Are you my girl now?" Or "Does this mean I'm your boyfriend now?" are a good choice of words.
The benefit of having a Filipina wife is that she can really take care of her husband and the household. Household chores are part of the child's life from scrubbing floors to cooking to taking care of the kids.
Basically, you have to determine where she really is at. If she's in the Metro or in the province. The place is one factor in thinking how you should know her. Like for me,i am from the North i've also lived in Metro manila for few years before i move to the US,you might want to Court her first- courting means telling how you feel face to face (yes, you have to meet her) or have you two already met? Or you might want to call her directly in the phone. Ways that you can be in touch with each other with a whip of being personal. Meeting the girl first is the first in courting.
Then, she will be the one who will introduce you to her parents. How do this happen? She will hint going to her house-- either its because its her mom's birthday or its christmas or something like that. If no hint came, you should initiate the desire to meet her parents. Meeting the parents signifies that you are serious in your relationship or at least to her. This is the stage also where the parents can judge if you are a good man whom they can entrust their 'princess'. Bringing flowers and gifts is okay but need not be expensive. Like cakes or fruits. Forget the "GOAT" or any other cattles..haha--
After meeting with her Dad,and with her since you said she's coming to the US for visit, and if you think the Dad approve of you, you can start the courting proper. Like calling her, texting messages... going to the movies if she like or helping out with her family during occasions.
Ask for the status of your relationship. We girls are embarrassed to ask this directly you know. Asking simple questions like "Are you my girl now?" Or "Does this mean I'm your boyfriend now?" are a good choice of words.
The benefit of having a Filipina wife is that she can really take care of her husband and the household. Household chores are part of the child's life from scrubbing floors to cooking to taking care of the kids.
Thank you Pinayginger!
I am going to the Philippines in May. I am no longer going to meet any romantic interests but I do plan to meet friends I have over there. I must say that I have been through just about all of what you stated. I am going to just take my time and see what may happen. I appreciate your input and hope that you monitor this thread to offer more input in the future.
Well this is all so interesting. I am BLACK AMERICAN and I am going to Philippines in April to meet a young woman who I think is the most exceptional person I have met. It will be a year March 3. I am MR SKEPTICAL and yet I really believe this is one of the real good ones. We communicated for six months and she NEVER ONCE asked me for money. I sent her money the seventh month and three months after that AFTER I INSISTED because I found out she was in pain because of a tooth and had no money for dentist. This a friend of her's on fb finally told me because EVERYONE was telling her to ask her "AMERICAN FRIEND" and she for two months refused and dealt with it. I sent it she got help and NEVER has she asked me for a dime since. She works 12 hours a day in restaurant and I offered her this morning (yes I know but I did, I mean its been a year already) and she said "I will think about it honey." And changed the subject to our meeting.
In the mid 80's my Father divorced my step mother after 17 years of marriage, took his half of the house money he got for their house $135,000 and for some crazy reason (NONE OF US KNEW) started going to Philippines. This was 80's and no internet. Next thing we knew about a year later he comes back to California with this young filipino woman MORE than half his age. 18 years later (2003 he passed) they were the happiness couple I have ever seen in my life. My father was THE HAPPIEST I had ever seen him in MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!!! I was around and she was A JEWEL. She was the hardest working woman I had ever seen. She insisted on working and learning more and more and always took care of him and the house. He lost his legs one year prior to his death due to diabetes and SHE LIFTED AND TOOK CARE OF HIM in ways I do not think an American woman her age would even think about. It was amazing to watch!
So I have a little history with this process and I think I am bias but filipinas are NUMBER 1 in my book even though I am well aware of the bad ones. I do think this ONE I found is exceptional as well. I will finally wee when I leave to spend one month in Bacolod with her in April. Didn't plan to say that much but I think it is a pretty good story for this forum. :-)
Well this is all so interesting. I am BLACK AMERICAN and I am going to Philippines in April to meet a young woman who I think is the most exceptional person I have met. It will be a year March 3. I am MR SKEPTICAL and yet I really believe this is one of the real good ones. We communicated for six months and she NEVER ONCE asked me for money. I sent her money the seventh month and three months after that AFTER I INSISTED because I found out she was in pain because of a tooth and had no money for dentist. This a friend of her's on fb finally told me because EVERYONE was telling her to ask her "AMERICAN FRIEND" and she for two months refused and dealt with it. I sent it she got help and NEVER has she asked me for a dime since. She works 12 hours a day in restaurant and I offered her this morning (yes I know but I did, I mean its been a year already) and she said "I will think about it honey." And changed the subject to our meeting.
In the mid 80's my Father divorced my step mother after 17 years of marriage, took his half of the house money he got for their house $135,000 and for some crazy reason (NONE OF US KNEW) started going to Philippines. This was 80's and no internet. Next thing we knew about a year later he comes back to California with this young filipino woman MORE than half his age. 18 years later (2003 he passed) they were the happiness couple I have ever seen in my life. My father was THE HAPPIEST I had ever seen him in MY ENTIRE LIFE!!!!! I was around and she was A JEWEL. She was the hardest working woman I had ever seen. She insisted on working and learning more and more and always took care of him and the house. He lost his legs one year prior to his death due to diabetes and SHE LIFTED AND TOOK CARE OF HIM in ways I do not think an American woman her age would even think about. It was amazing to watch!
So I have a little history with this process and I think I am bias but filipinas are NUMBER 1 in my book even though I am well aware of the bad ones. I do think this ONE I found is exceptional as well. I will finally wee when I leave to spend one month in Bacolod with her in April. Didn't plan to say that much but I think it is a pretty good story for this forum. :-)
Well you have an interesting story thatNEWTHOUGHTguy!
I am a Black American-Canadian and a few weeks ago my relationship ended. I am still going to the Philippines in May but I am flying over with another Filipina friend I know who's going over to take care of her mother in Bulacan. She confessed to me that when I told her that I was going to the Philippines in May, she without giving it any serious thought made the decision to book her trip for the same time I booked mine for. She is a friend who knew that I had a Filipina girlfriend over there at the time but stayed around to be a friend to me. During that time she became aware of how jealous my girlfriend was acting at the time and when things fell apart, including the plan for me to stay at her brother's condo in Quezon City, she offered to let me stay with her. So now we are going to stay together in the Philippines to some extent but I will be alone about half of the month that I'll be there. I will just sight see and meet up with my other Filipina friends while I'm there and just do me. LOL! So at some point I hope to meet the right one, even if she's not a Filipina. From what I've learned Filipinas make some of the best wives a man could have.
Thanks for sharing your story. Do come back and give an update and possibly some photos when you get a chance.
Most Filipino ladies prefer a western boyfriend.
In other non-western countries, for example in Mainland SE Asia , South Asia, Central Asia and West Asia, having relationship with westerners can be a disgrace.
What's wrong with Filipino men or Asian men? Aren't they good enough?
Many people back in the States know about their real intention. American women complaining about women from developing countries stealing their men.
EastAsianladyyy, I don't put all American women or even women in general in the same boat but if American women (some) did things to become better friends, girlfriends and wives, then perhaps they wouldn't have a whole lot to complain about. We men just want the very best woman for us and if she happens to be outside of our country and culture, then so be it. Love sees no color nor ethnicity.
Many people are hard on girls from developing countries. But as long as you remember that these girls are still following rules from bygone days you can make out ok.
Remember that:
she is more likely marrying for position and security just as women did here in the past. that wont mean that she can't come to love you. it is just that she is starting from a far different plance than you are
her family will always be important to her and she has a duty to them (would you want to marry someone who can easily shirk this duty?)
she has a moral code different from yours. so you'd best learn the difference between yours and hers fast.
her cute little niece and nephew might think that is who they are, but the family knows otherwise even if nobody - even their mother - thinks of them as anything but
under her rules of society and morality, she may fall in love with you in as little as a week or month and she may be sincere in her intentions to love and be faithful only to you. But under her rules, if you don't toe the line, she may disconnect from you just as rapidly.
Any relationship you get into will have some level of love and friendship, but you have to determine what that level is going in - with your eyes wide open and not leading with your chin. She may be a perfect girl for you, but you won't know unless you investigate and take a good long hard look at who your bride to be is. This is true in the US and in the PI. But once married you will have far more obligation to a foreign born woman.
And don't forget that your duty does not end at marriage. Are you bringing her over to be a sex slave, a brood-sow, a servant, a nanny, or a full partner and wife? How will she survive in American society if you are killed in a back alley knife fight? Will you have already:
taught her to drive so that she can get around
sent her to school so she can make a living in case you are not there
gotten an insurance policy to care for her and the children or pay off the house
made arrangements so she can go home to see her family every 3-5 years
saved for the trip back home if her mother or father dies
saved enough money so that the two of you can live on one salary for the three years she is not permitted to work in the US?
arranged to teacher her true english so she does not feel like an outsider and people dont look down on her
There is far more to consider than "ok boy, I'm in love!!!"
Last edited by blktoptrvl; 03-07-2014 at 05:29 AM..
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Love sees no color nor ethnicity.