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Old 03-04-2014, 10:17 PM
 
Location: Rivendell
1,385 posts, read 2,454,350 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JrzDefector View Post
Nope. Once I just accepted the idea of oblivion, it seemed much more palatable. I cherish my family and friends here that much more, and I have less patience for unhealthy or toxic people.

I love a lot of people, and a lot of people love me. That's all I really think matters. I do wonder if I will be sad if I grow very old and the people dearest to me have passed on - that's way scarier than ceasing to exist. But I keep meeting people and making new friends, so it's not a serious concern.
Great post! I could not rep you.
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Old 03-05-2014, 04:38 AM
 
Location: Hickville USA
5,903 posts, read 3,793,445 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mark3455 View Post
I became an atheist awhile ago, it just gradually happened. I no longer could believe in many of the things that religion asks you to believe in.
As that happened, I lost a MAJOR security blanket, the notion that there is an afterlife and you don't just disappear after death.
This doesn't bother me so much while in the daytime but a few times, while asleep or half asleep, I find myself thinking about dying and just being… nothing. That or just floating in nothingness, like limbo, which I realize is nonsense. But it's fear of mortality, fear of death, fear of ceasing to be anything. Sometimes, I wake with a start, sometimes briefly yell out like I'm startled and then I startle my wife.

Anyone else? How did you cope with it? Does it ever go away?
Those of us who went from religion to atheism have all lost our security blankets. That's the really tough part about it and I'm not sure we ever become really comfortable with becoming nothingness. But it seems to be the only reality and we have to accept it somehow. I, however, do believe there is some sort of afterlife, that this isn't all there is. I see nothing wrong with believing this even as an atheist and it has nothing to do with religion. Just a gut feeling that I have. I've often wondered about reincarnation and our ability to continue on in some form or another. That might explain the real experience of deja vu, which all of us have experienced at one time or another.

But that's just me being my usual positive self. If there is nothing after this life I'll be fine with that, I won't have any choice or be able to even know that I'm non-existent. So sorry you're having nightmares, but with time it will get better as you realize that it's all out of your hands anyway and learn to focus on the moment and not what will be or could be. Good luck.
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Old 03-05-2014, 06:06 AM
 
Location: S. Wales.
50,088 posts, read 20,712,695 times
Reputation: 5930
Indeed. I am quite comfortable with Nothingness, but the important point you make is that one can fefuse to believe that death is the end, and still have no belief in organized religion, Holy Books or man-made gods admitting or barring people from entry to the afterlife on their say -so.

This is the ongoing scam and con of religion - pretending that they hold the keys to an afterlife which -if there is one, and whatever form it takes, should be open toall.

'You cannot enter afterlife because you did not believe in Me!'

Cobblers.
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Old 03-05-2014, 09:35 PM
 
63,799 posts, read 40,068,856 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AREQUIPA View Post
Indeed. I am quite comfortable with Nothingness, but the important point you make is that one can fefuse to believe that death is the end, and still have no belief in organized religion, Holy Books or man-made gods admitting or barring people from entry to the afterlife on their say -so.
This is the ongoing scam and con of religion - pretending that they hold the keys to an afterlife which -if there is one, and whatever form it takes, should be open toall.
'You cannot enter afterlife because you did not believe in Me!'
Cobblers.
This captures the major idiocy in the religions that pretend to explain God and our fate after death. AS you say, Arq . . . whatever we face will be faced by all. Pleading to or flattering or otherwise pretending to kowtow to some version of potentially punishing judge or decider of our fate is pointless. We will reap whatever we sow . . . as it has always been and ever will be in this universe. My God simply wishes to see us minimize the negative consequences of an unloving and selfish life . . . as would any loving Father. There is no punishing or judging or handing down sentences. We earn what we earn based on who and what we have become. The closer to Christ we are . . . the better our situation, period.
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Old 03-05-2014, 09:45 PM
 
16,294 posts, read 28,526,360 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MysticPhD View Post
This captures the major idiocy in the religions that pretend to explain God and our fate after death. AS you say, Arq . . . whatever we face will be faced by all. Pleading to or flattering or otherwise pretending to kowtow to some version of potentially punishing judge or decider of our fate is pointless. We will reap whatever we sow . . . as it has always been and ever will be in this universe. My God simply wishes to see us minimize the negative consequences of an unloving and selfish life . . . as would any loving Father. There is no punishing or judging or handing down sentences. We earn what we earn based on who and what we have become. The closer to Christ we are . . . the better our situation, period.
We sometimes reap what we sow in this life, sometimes people skate by without reaping, be it good or bad. We answer to man and ourselves, but the rumored wishes of wished for gods may serve the purpose of keeping those without personal morality in line.

The best person and the worst person are equal in death, they like every single person just no longer exist.
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Old 03-05-2014, 09:53 PM
 
501 posts, read 1,050,247 times
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No. My mortality has never worried me. I have always just hoped that it would be quick. I often have night terrors about other peoples deaths that I have witnessed though. I have PTSD. It is nothing that I would wish on anyone.
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Old 03-10-2014, 11:28 AM
 
9,408 posts, read 11,929,707 times
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Not anymore, no. Haven't for a long, long time. But, this wasn't always the case. I was raised as a christian fundy, and believed that stuff through early adulthood. You know what was one common experience I had throughout that time? Frequent nightmares of the end of the world, and of dying, death and then judgement. Specifically, I was always dreaming I died and had gone to hell, as I was sooo afraid I was not able to live to the standards I believed God had for me. My entire experience as a fundy was ruled by fear. For some reason I am susceptible to sleep paralysis, which itself can be terrifying. So these dreams I had of dying and going on to an eternal hell were truly horrifying. According to those I lived with I frequently cried out in my sleep, which is good cuz it caused them to wake me and release me from my horror. Then I'd wake up and cry, just overcome with grief, and terror. THe dreams were so vivid and real, and horrifying, worse than any horror literature or movie I'd ever seen. They would affect my mood for days, and I'd be afraid to fall back asleep.

However, I walked away from those beliefs in early adulthood and haven't had any dreams of dying, or even death, let alone eternal damnation, in probably 15 years. The monkey has long since climbed down from off my back.
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Old 03-11-2014, 07:40 AM
 
Location: S. Wales.
50,088 posts, read 20,712,695 times
Reputation: 5930
Great post! Are there any Believers who get horror -dreams about death and hell, or any ex- believers who stopped having them? l
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Old 03-11-2014, 12:40 PM
 
4,196 posts, read 6,296,718 times
Reputation: 2835
Quote:
Originally Posted by mark3455 View Post
I became an atheist awhile ago, it just gradually happened. I no longer could believe in many of the things that religion asks you to believe in.
As that happened, I lost a MAJOR security blanket, the notion that there is an afterlife and you don't just disappear after death.
This doesn't bother me so much while in the daytime but a few times, while asleep or half asleep, I find myself thinking about dying and just being… nothing. That or just floating in nothingness, like limbo, which I realize is nonsense. But it's fear of mortality, fear of death, fear of ceasing to be anything. Sometimes, I wake with a start, sometimes briefly yell out like I'm startled and then I startle my wife.

Anyone else? How did you cope with it? Does it ever go away?
I share the same feeling sometimes, although probably not as intense as you describe yours.
I suggest you read the short book "Mortality" by Christopher Hitchens. It might help.
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Old 03-11-2014, 12:44 PM
 
4,196 posts, read 6,296,718 times
Reputation: 2835
Quote:
Originally Posted by Grandstander View Post
The actualization of the fear is also the solution, you are speaking of existential angst and the only absolute cure is death.

There isn't really anything to fear about being dead, you will not be aware of it, you will not be frustrated by not being alive, it will be the same state you were in before you were conceived and you handled that well enough, didn't you?
Yes, very true.
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