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My favourite quotes come from Ambrose Bierce's The Devil's Dictionary.
Some of my favourates are:
Quote:
BRAIN, n.
An apparatus with which we think what we think. That which distinguishes the man who is content to be something from the man who wishes to do something. A man of great wealth, or one who has been pitchforked into high station, has commonly such a headful of brain that his neighbors cannot keep their hats on. In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, brain is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office
CORPORATION, n.
An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.
CRITIC, n.
A person who boasts himself hard to please because nobody tries to please him.
DARING, n.
One of the most conspicuous qualities of a man in security.
DESTINY, n.
A tyrant's authority for crime and fool's excuse for failure.
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