What are Boston men like? (Fall River, Quincy: rental car, rental, chapel)

[ogre]

Originally Posted by Pear Martini

If a man is polite, has decent hygiene, and isn't commenting on the woman's physical appearance and she is single then I see no reason why any woman would react in anger.

Maybe it's not that Boston women are "snooty" but maybe Boston men are socially stunted, even socially retarded.

Maybe women are snooty and men are socially retarded

Or maybe sometimes it's a misinterpretation of situations where the actual reason for the cool response is that cultural propensity toward polite reserve with strangers.

[uncalifornian girl]

Originally Posted by ipoetry

There are other men who have to build houses for the wicked smart professor types, and do their plumbing, as well as provide other trades.

Sounds good. I'll take what I can get The professor thing was just a wisecrack. Practicing my Boston accent...

[massnative71]

Originally Posted by Pear Martini

If a man is polite, has decent hygiene, and isn't commenting on the woman's physical appearance and she is single then I see no reason why any woman would react in anger.

I don't either, but...


In all seriousness though, there is a lot more to the story than the things you are saying. Many women around here just aren't that enjoyable to be around. I'm talking no sense of humor, game playing, an unattractive combination of being both insecure and entitled at the same time, cliquish, and yes stuck up. While this is a generalization, why would a man try to battle the odds that very likely the only thing they would do is add to an already over-inflated ego.

In contrast it seems women you meet from let's say Texas or California are more friendly, chill, and less judgemental. Rather than going through the: "oh sure he's trying to get inside my pants", "Is he good enough for me?How can I test him?", they're just looking to enjoy the evening maybe see what happens next. i'm sure the fact that women from elsewhere might be new to town might also play an influence, as it would therefore be more likely that they are more open to meeting new people/ new things, etc.

So I think Boston guys are somewhat conditioned to be this way, and Ogre is also correct about the cultural aspect (this has been a theme in some of your posts as well).

Your encounter with the older guy at the RMV has nothing to do with this conversation, of course one should tell him to buzz off. But the complaint here seems to be of guys not taking the initiative (obviously this creep would and has), that whole thing doesn't really make sense to me.


uncalifornian girl, to answer your question I think as previously said; only Lakers gear will really give it away. I don't know, maybe just how you carry yourself (not walking around with your nose in the air and a puss on your face) might imply you are from elsewhere. Like I said, a guy who might be used to having his guard up around the typical local girls; could see you as a breath of fresh air once knowing you are from California ("oh, maybe she's not a snotty calculating b#$%#!!!"). I don't know a single guy who isn't turned on by the sterotypical California female, even though I tell them they watch too much TV (having been out there myself).

[Cliff Clavin]

Originally Posted by Pear Martini

So whats a woman supposed to do if she is waiting at the RMV and a man twice her age starts obviously hitting on her AND he has disgusting bad breath. I seriously wanted to tell him to leave me alone but I realized that I may have come off as "conceited" or "rude" for assuming he was hitting on me. I was also reading a magazine. What the hell do you come to the RMV to pick up women? I'm here reading what makes you think I want to talk to you? I ended up having a conversation with him for like 20 minutes and when I left I was pissed because his breath smelled like **** and his cousin was creepy. I was pissed that I had to be polite in a situation where I wanted to be like **** off you disgusting pervert. By the way I'm 23 and he had to be at least in his mid-50s.

^ Perfect example of when a sharp "Go f* yourself" is warranted. Why waste your time with such foolishness? You're not doing him any favors either.

Boston women can come off as stone cold b-words, but I do appreciate the directness.

[westwind15]

uncalifornian girl, to answer your question I think as previously said; only Lakers gear will really give it away

As another born-and-raised Californian, I can tell you, people often know I am not from here as soon as I talk. At the end of the day, I go get into my car, not my cahhhh. They keep telling me I have an accent! ;-)

[Brave Stranger]

Most of these issues between the sexes can be resolved if people would just pay attention to body-language. Men, in general, don't seem to be as good at this as women.....not because men lack the ability IMO, but because of social factors that I'm not going to drone on about in this post. The key is to pay attention to the signs people are throwing out, and also your own body language.

I almost never have these issues cause I'm very aware of my surroundings & I read people very well. It also helps that I look like a male model & more often than not find myself fighting the woman-folk off

[xS☺B☺s]

I think what it all boils down to is the women of New England never seem to be able to find the key to their chastity belts. They tend to lose it somewhere between their puritanism and their womens lib. I sure don't miss that. Too bad, cuz they are hot!

Originally Posted by massnative71

I don't either, but...


In all seriousness though, there is a lot more to the story than the things you are saying. Many women around here just aren't that enjoyable to be around. I'm talking no sense of humor, game playing, an unattractive combination of being both insecure and entitled at the same time, cliquish, and yes stuck up. While this is a generalization, why would a man try to battle the odds that very likely the only thing they would do is add to an already over-inflated ego.

In contrast it seems women you meet from let's say Texas or California are more friendly, chill, and less judgemental. Rather than going through the: "oh sure he's trying to get inside my pants", "Is he good enough for me?How can I test him?", they're just looking to enjoy the evening maybe see what happens next. i'm sure the fact that women from elsewhere might be new to town might also play an influence, as it would therefore be more likely that they are more open to meeting new people/ new things, etc.

So I think Boston guys are somewhat conditioned to be this way, and Ogre is also correct about the cultural aspect (this has been a theme in some of your posts as well).

Your encounter with the older guy at the RMV has nothing to do with this conversation, of course one should tell him to buzz off. But the complaint here seems to be of guys not taking the initiative (obviously this creep would and has), that whole thing doesn't really make sense to me.


uncalifornian girl, to answer your question I think as previously said; only Lakers gear will really give it away. I don't know, maybe just how you carry yourself (not walking around with your nose in the air and a puss on your face) might imply you are from elsewhere. Like I said, a guy who might be used to having his guard up around the typical local girls; could see you as a breath of fresh air once knowing you are from California ("oh, maybe she's not a snotty calculating b#$%#!!!"). I don't know a single guy who isn't turned on by the sterotypical California female, even though I tell them they watch too much TV (having been out there myself).

[Eugene80]

I recently had a date in Boston with a girl I met through my friends. I'm new to Boston so I asked her to show me the city.

She told me there's no shortage of lonely men in Bostom -- women get hit on regularly and never lack attention. I saw some of that myself. When we were out a restaurant she was subjected to some very uncomfortable stares ... from much older men, and also despite the fact that there was a guy next to her (me).

We also went to a nightclub and there were quite a few lonely guys there as well.

[ogre]

Originally Posted by Cliff Clavin

^ Perfect example of when a sharp "Go f* yourself" is warranted. Why waste your time with such foolishness? You're not doing him any favors either.

Boston women can come off as stone cold b-words, but I do appreciate the directness.

I agree with this. Pear Martini, I don't think anyone here is saying you need to accommodate some guy who's dirty, boorish, etc., like that guy you describe encountering at the RMV.

I'll keep to my earlier observation that the reserved demeanor that seems to be part of the local culture may sometimes be misinterpreted as snootiness, but I think that sometimes there also is something to the idea that guys who are reasonably clean and reasonably attractive will get the cold shoulder from women in Boston maybe more often than this happens in some other cities. Sometimes it's just a reserved demeanor toward strangers, but sometimes there really do seem to be an unusual number of women around here with inflated opinions of themselves, who can really be cold toward more reasonable guys than the one you describe, for daring to show even the slightest hint of interest.

[xS☺B☺s]

Mr Ogre's name so belies his Proper Bostonian Gentile manners. I'm a fan OG!

Pear, while I agree with most guys and have an intense love/hate view on the B-Girls, I definitely think you were too nice with friendly ole Freaky Mr Frankenstein. That's not typical in BOS. Next time get yer gangsta on and punch 'im in the belly!

Originally Posted by ogre

I agree with this. Pear Martini, I don't think anyone here is saying you need to accommodate some guy who's dirty, boorish, etc., like that guy you describe encountering at the RMV.

I'll keep to my earlier observation that the reserved demeanor that seems to be part of the local culture may sometimes be misinterpreted as snootiness, but I think that sometimes there also is something to the idea that guys who are reasonably clean and reasonably attractive will get the cold shoulder from women in Boston maybe more often than this happens in some other cities. Sometimes it's just a reserved demeanor toward strangers, but sometimes there really do seem to be an unusual number of women around here with inflated opinions of themselves, who can really be cold toward more reasonable guys than the one you describe, for daring to show even the slightest hint of interest.