Boston is so polite! (restaurant, military, store)

[Cliff Clavin]

^ Wait 'til she takes someone's parking space. Then she'll see 'rude'.

[massnative71]

Originally Posted by heather3

I have a story: when we were at the battlefields, it was very windy and my car door apparently hit the van next to me. I didn't know it and suddenly there was a knock on my window. The guy was ranting about me hitting his car and asked if I make it a habit of opening my doors into other people's cars. I was dumbfounded, never having been approached and so rudely to boot. I told him I was sorry, I didn't see any marks and he said he didn't care. Finally, I said thank you and rolled up my window and pulled away to him still angry.

Please read or re-read my list above.

In his defense I would have been agitated too. I mean it was an accident, but seriously how did you not know that you hit his vehicle??? I don't like it when people are rude, but like it even less when they are careless. I think that is a form of rudeness in itself that is unfortunately becoming much more prevalent today, like everyone is so wrapped up in themselves that they can't even be bothered to leave enough room between the next car and/or watch what they are doing (not accusing you, maybe the wind was totally unexpected). Maybe the guy was frustrated over countless little dings like that that can really add up at the auto body shop, and are totally preventable. I honestly think that had you immediately apologized (rather than get back in your car) and offered him a look and whatever else he needed you would have had a warmer encounter.

With that said I hate how parking spaces seem to keep shrinking in size. Please be careful folks I have enough scratches and dings on my paint!

[Tiger Beer]

Originally Posted by vanitycase

When I first moved here, I got all these warnings about what a rude town Boston is, and how cliquey and close-knit the society is, and how people will swear at me on the street, etc. I totally expected it to be another New York.

But Boston is perfectly polite.

Everyone remembers their pleases and thank yous, people smile and hold doors open if you're entering behind them, and many times the men address me with "miss" (I'm a twenty-something), which I thought was charming because nobody says "miss" anymore. Just last week I was walking towards South Station and a stranger passing me on Summer Street randomly nodded, smiled and said, "Have a good day, miss."

Now, this could be because the financial district is a nicer part of town and that's why people are pleasant, but I've encountered similar politeness in more "blue collar" areas like Southie.

I will admit that the drivers here are insane lunatics, but Bostonians in general are a hundred times better-mannered than New Yorkers. This city is almost as polite as London.

So where does the "Boston is rude" stereotype come from? Because I don't see it. Did other people come to Boston and feel surprised by the good manners? How does my experience compare to yours?

I never experienced rude NYers and I lived there for several years in Manhattan and Brooklyn.

I'm from a friendly place, and the constant nosy questions get tiring.

I have lived in other friendly west coast places in the country, where they do the 'have a nice day' and you can see them grit their teeth at having to say it.

Personally, I much prefer the authentic interactions of the East Coast...and I loved NYers, and didn't find them rude at all, but incredibly helpful, to-the-point, authentic, etc.

I'd always thought and read and assumed that Boston were more NY-like, East Coast-like authentic, to-the-point, helpful-when-needed than the superficial fake that you get elsewhere?

So, what you're trying to say is Boston are fake, superficial people?

[HenryAlan]

I've lived here long enough to have local cred, but when I first came to Boston, I was also told to expect rudeness. In 23 years, I've never encountered it as a general element of Boston culture. Sure, there will always be a jerk here and there, but overall, Bostonians are very friendly and helpful to strangers. What we don't do is engage in fake pleasantries. Personally, I consider the stylized polite mannerisms found in some parts of this country to be the true rude behavior. If it isn't based on any real feelings, it's a lie.

[lovelife11]

If u hit someones car though dude u kinda have to expect some anger. I would upset if u hit my car too. Cars are expensive and getting them repaired is also expensive

[Tombstoner]

Friends from Atlanta were up here last week and couldn't stop raving about how pleasant Bostonians are compared to the so-called Southern hospitality of Georgia. I've met a few jerks in the year and a half I've been here, but just a few. I would say Boston is definitely a polite place.

[holden125]

Originally Posted by Tiger Beer

I'd always thought and read and assumed that Boston were more NY-like, East Coast-like authentic, to-the-point, helpful-when-needed than the superficial fake that you get elsewhere?

So, what you're trying to say is Boston are fake, superficial people?

This seems to be logic gone backwards. I don't know where you get the idea that people here must be (1) exactly as rude as people in New York or (2) "fake, superficial people"?

Virtually nobody here will ask nosy questions or even speak to you in public if you haven't approached them first. You will not find even a hint of the over-the-top "bless your heart" stuff from the South. People here are often (not always) polite if they're waiting on you somewhere, and they'll say thank you if you hold the door for them. How does that translate to superficial?

[Tiger Beer]

Originally Posted by holden125

This seems to be logic gone backwards. I don't know where you get the idea that people here must be (1) exactly as rude as people in New York or (2) "fake, superficial people"?

Virtually nobody here will ask nosy questions or even speak to you in public if you haven't approached them first. You will not find even a hint of the over-the-top "bless your heart" stuff from the South. People here are often (not always) polite if they're waiting on you somewhere, and they'll say thank you if you hold the door for them. How does that translate to superficial?

Your 2nd paragraph, yeah, that's what I like.

I don't like the Southern or California styles of superficial.

I was trying to make an irony in there to whatever I was quoting, but must have failed.

[krapug1]

Last week was vacation week, and after spending the first half of the week doing the "staycation"
thing around Boston we had to fly down to Baltimore as my spouses nephew was getting married.

After 4 days in B-more I was so happy to get on that plane (and I hate to fly). What a rude, crude,
classless place B-more is. Even the Whole Foods in Harbor East had an edge.

Were far more polite, and friendly than we often think.

Ken

[shoesandcowboys]

I have lived all over the US and overseas...military brat, and was married to a soldier. I have to agree with previous posters, east coast folks are much more honest and up front, that may come off as rude to some people, especially those from the west coast. I have found that the most unaccepting and unfriendly people are actually in the west, especially California. I actually call it the France of America..lol..sorry to those of you who love the french! Sure, in the west people may talk to you in the grocery store or wherever, but they are not sincere, and they certainly are not open. I finally figured it must have something to do with history, Manifest Destiny and all because people in the west do not want to live close to or know their neighbors, they dont do the weekend bbq's and dont even get me started on how they have no real interest in sports! Try to talk to someone from the west about football and watch their eyes glaze over! Oh sure they watch their teams, course when their teams are losing they bandwagon onto the next winning team, no real team loyalty in the west. I also have a pretty sick sense of humor, love funny people, say pretty much whatever enters my brain without too much filter...this is all TERRIFYING to people out west, they do not appreciate real humor, or unfiltered conversation. People think that folks in Cali are laid back...r they insane??? I lived in Cali for 6 years, still own my home there. Californians have to be the most repressed people I have every met, and totally caught up in status...least authentic people I have ever lived around, and I am not surprised to find the people posting who are most unhappy in Boston tend to be those transplants from Cali....who think that the end all be all is California and nothing can compare.
To clarify, when I say west, I am not talking Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas, etc., those are fabulous and wonderful places with warm and genuine folks. I am talking Colorado on over to Cali. Soooooo....as a world traveler and a gypsy at heart, I love the culture of Boston, I find the people to be refreshingly funny and dont take themselves too serious.