How to convince dh not to move to Boston!!

[AuntieMoon]

Thanks to you all for taking the time to respond & sharing your knowledge of the Greater Boston Area (aka GAB). It was definitely helpful & any other info, esp. about schools, quality of life, and cost of living, will be appreciated too.

I recall hearing some people talk about relocating to Boston some years ago and some other people warning them away from certain areas because they were "too snobby". The giver of the advice suggested Lexington or Concord (if memory serves me correctly) instead of the other places, which I can't recall.

Would anyone be able to tell me which areas might really be "too snobby"? What would that mean in GAB terms: no one will be friends with you if you don't drive a car worth more than at least 50K, for example? Or no one will talk to you if you didn't graduate from Harvard or Yale? Or you won't ever get invited anywhere unless you had at least one ancester who arrived on the Mayflower? Just wondering. (Of course there are snobs everywhere, BTW.)

Thanks again--
As ever,
AuntieMoon

[LovelyBoston]

Originally Posted by AuntieMoon

Thanks to you all for taking the time to respond & sharing your knowledge of the Greater Boston Area (aka GAB). It was definitely helpful & any other info, esp. about schools, quality of life, and cost of living, will be appreciated too.

I recall hearing some people talk about relocating to Boston some years ago and some other people warning them away from certain areas because they were "too snobby". The giver of the advice suggested Lexington or Concord (if memory serves me correctly) instead of the other places, which I can't recall.

Would anyone be able to tell me which areas might really be "too snobby"? What would that mean in GAB terms: no one will be friends with you if you don't drive a car worth more than at least 50K, for example? Or no one will talk to you if you didn't graduate from Harvard or Yale? Or you won't ever get invited anywhere unless you had at least one ancester who arrived on the Mayflower? Just wondering. (Of course there are snobs everywhere, BTW.)

Thanks again--
As ever,
AuntieMoon

I have heard a couple of people on these threads complain about snobby Mass residents who shun you if you are not wealthy. But I have never, ever experienced that -- and I grew up in a wealthy town, as a part of a lower-middle-class family that once had to sell the family car to afford groceries, for goodness sake. lol We struggled when I was a kid. But there was no snobbiness. If you are confident and are not insecure yourself about your lack of a Harvard degree and a Mercedes, you're fine anywhere. lol. And yes, many of us came in the 1600s -- but many more didn't. Boston is a huge area for immigration.

*Please* don't let prior comments about snobbiness scare you off of any towns!!

BTW, I lived near Concord. Great area. Walden Pond is there. Nice downtown. Fantastic schools.

[mindybolton]

Originally Posted by Grass Is Greener

Get a divorce! lol

No, seriously, do yourself a favor and STAY where you are, from your post I am pretty sure you are going to hate boston. You will be miserable. You will be cold. You will hate the new small house (or more likely apartment) with no yard. You'll be depressed with all the dark cold wet winters. You were not meant to live in boston. Make a trip once in a while and visit. It's nice to visit there. NOT to live. Trust me.

Damn Boston hater (Grass is Greener? Where'd your get that thought from...) why not just tell us what you REALLY feel? Lol.

Look, he may want Boston, she may not, but in the end there will always, I mean ALWAYS be something about a place you live that you won't like, regardless of that place. Live in the Bahamas and you'll probably get skincancer- live in Boston and you'll prob get depression (according to Greener grass depressed man) Live in LONDON ENGLAND like me (relocating to Mass soon though) and you'll go broke from how ridiculously expensive everything is...taxes out the yin yang than anyplace on earth (except Tokyo, which is the only city more expensive on earth than London).

Move to Boston- if you hate it then leave, simple as that.
I think you have to have a great perspective and go looking for some good.

[DaveV]

Originally Posted by applejuice

We live in Georgia and I love our nice house, with great yard, and mild winters. However, my dh is constantly driving me crazy about moving to Boston.

All I have heard for the last ten years is about moving to Boston. All I know is that is cold and expensive. I hate the cold, snow, and the small house in the ghetto we can afford.

Please tell me how Boston is not that great! Don't get me wrong...Boston is a beautiful city TO VISIT.

Please help me convince dh not to move...ever!

CAn someone tell me what a "dh" is..?

[whinton]

Originally Posted by AuntieMoon

I recall hearing some people talk about relocating to Boston some years ago and some other people warning them away from certain areas because they were "too snobby".

Interesting comment. FWIW, my experience is that Boston "snobby" is very different than other parts of the country. Boston tends to be less materialistic, and more into education. You see flashy cars less here (such as hummers, etc), and New Englanders--even wealthy ones--are known for being very frugal. So "snobby" in Boston is more about the quality of education, less about cars, clothes, etc.

[CaseyB]

Originally Posted by DaveV

CAn someone tell me what a "dh" is..?

Internet abbreviation for "dear husband".

[breezy1]

Interesting comments regarding worrying about "snobby" people in Boston ... There are snobby and down-to-earth people everywhere. I'm from the NE and seriously considered moving to Atlanta a couple years ago. Spent quite a bit of time in Atlanta, and one thing that really struck me was how "showy" people were with their money ... and also a bit more concerned with outward appearances and a touch more materialistic (or at least more openly talked about it). So, in some ways that could be considered a bit snobby as well.

Bottom line -- You will find all kinds of people no matter where you go. I don't think that one place has more of their share of snobiness than another.

[b_alt]

I love Boston, but you asked for reasons to hate it. So here are a few:

1) Expensive, unless you come from SF or NYC. Then, it is a deal.
2) Cold and variable Winter weather (bad if you don't like it)
3) Overeducated (possibly bad if you are not overeducated)
4) Liberal (possibly bad if you are not liberal)

As for snobby:

There are pockets of old New England snobby in some of the outlying areas. It is harmless provincialism. Just tell them you love New England and you will be fine.

The old Boston snobby is hard to find. Those few that are left keep to themselves and you will not interact with them much. But you will see them on occasion. The new Boston is much more diverse and run by high tech, finance and education.

Many big cities have a defining group or industry:

LA- Movies
NYC- Finance
Wash- Politics
ATL- Old South and new business (I'm guessing, because I've never been)
SF Bay Area- High tech

If you are not part of these groups in these cities, then you can feel left out and they can seem snobby.

In Boston, this is education. Everyone seems highly educated, and this can be intimidating for those who are not. Not only that, but they are high quality educations due to the many high quality schools in the area. Plus, the businesses attract others who are highly educated. When I arrived five years ago, some of the first people I met: A Yale-Yale couple, a Princeton-Princeton couple, a Brown-Brandeis couple, a Harvard-Harvard couple. You get the idea. None of these people were snobby, but I might have thought they were if did not feel comfortable with my own education. In contrast, noone in SF or Seattle looks down on Steve Jobs or Bill Gates for being college dropouts. Other things matter more out there like real estate, high tech money and the next business deal.

Of course there are plenty of people in Boston who are not overeducated. It just seems easier to survive here if either 1) You are overeducated or 2) You don't care that other people are.