Elder Care/ Neglect (child, adult, parent, father)

[hellard]

My dad was recently placed in a nursing home for the on set of dementia. The nursing home is calling every day because my dad wants to go home. The doctor says he needs 24 hour care which I cannot provide but they are saying that they can get me for neglect when I am not a legal guardian to him

[Briolat21]

Sorry - your description is a little hard to follow.

You don't have to be someone's guardian in order to be found guilty of neglect. Say someone took in their disabled nephew, but weren't his legal guardian.. and authorities found the young man (over age 18) in horrible physical condition and found that the owner of the home knew that the young man needed assistance, but they failed to take actions to provide it, or get the young man help. That could *potentially* lead to a charge of neglect.

If he is now in a nursing home, and you do not have the ability to care for him at home, then he probably needs to stay in the nursing home. Even if it is heartbreaking that he wants to come home. If he has money that could pay for round the clock aides, then perhaps you could consider taking him out of the nursing home .. but that can be very expensive and would have to be paid for somehow.

I am very sorry that your father and you are in such a situation. Dementia is a very sad disease. I wish you both the best.

[KathrynAragon]

Who placed your dad in the nursing home? Who coordinated that care? How is it being paid for? Does your dad have a legal guardian? Do you have POA for your dad? Where is your dad's home he wants to return to? What sort of support does he have available there?

[lchoro]

From what you describe, the nursing home may be coming after you. Under a doctor's recommendation, you had your father institutionalized.

Adult Children Could Be on Hook for Parents' Nursing Home Bills | ElderLawAnswers

Best thing would be to go back to the nursing home and talk to the social worker to get more clarity on your responsibilities if you don't understand the forms you signed to get your dad admitted. It may be that you needed to get him into the Medicaid system before committing to a facility.

[Clemencia53]

Originally Posted by hellard

My dad was recently placed in a nursing home for the on set of dementia. The nursing home is calling every day because my dad wants to go home. The doctor says he needs 24 hour care which I cannot provide but they are saying that they can get me for neglect when I am not a legal guardian to him

Find a different home. Maybe they are not equipped to handle his case. He might need one that deals with Alzheimer's.

And who is "they" that is telling you this?

[JanND]

Originally Posted by hellard

My dad was recently placed in a nursing home for the on set of dementia. The nursing home is calling every day because my dad wants to go home. The doctor says he needs 24 hour care which I cannot provide but they are saying that they can get me for neglect when I am not a legal guardian to him

The nursing home is threatening you with neglect? Are they trying to discharge him?

Call his Doctor...tell his staff what the nursing home is threatening you with. Tell them you are not able to properly care for him at home. And you are confused, ask to have the local Ombudsman call you. Ombudsman look out for seniors in facilities. Explain you can't care for him at home, and that you're confused as to what you are supposed to do to get him the appropriate care.

You need to talk to someone, like the social worker at the nursing home, or the ombudsman...sounds like he needs to be discharged to a facility that can provide the appropriate care. If medicare is paying, there are deadlines and red tape that facilities have to jump thru in order to get him the care he needs. You are likely the decision maker by default.

They are likely needing your signature to be able to transfer him. How long have you been avoiding their calls, or avoiding dealing with this? It will be ok if you talk to them...it can be extremely confusing. I think someone is dropping the ball in failing to set you down and explain what happens to you. Instead they are scaring you..call that ombudsman.

here is a national link...you can look up the ombudsman for your area tell them what's going on. They will get you all on the same page, and get your Dad the care he needs.
http://theconsumervoice.org/get_help

good luck to you.

[JanND]

Originally Posted by lchoro

From what you describe, the nursing home may be coming after you. Under a doctor's recommendation, you had your father institutionalized.

Adult Children Could Be on Hook for Parents' Nursing Home Bills | ElderLawAnswers

Best thing would be to go back to the nursing home and talk to the social worker to get more clarity on your responsibilities if you don't understand the forms you signed to get your dad admitted. It may be that you needed to get him into the Medicaid system before committing to a facility.

The good news is not every state goes after the kids to pay.