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While it can't be easy (at all) becoming elderly, we often hear stories about their stubbornness, unwillingness
to make adjustments or compromises.
Does anyone have a story about an elderly person they know who adjusted accordingly?
My father (another story - ) had a cousin who never married. She worked as a bishop's secretary
for many years. She lived with her single brother in an apt. He died suddenly from a heart attack one day.
After that, she lived alone. She fell in the shower and broke her arm. After that happened, she made the decision it wasn't safe to live alone. I think she used some connections she had through the church and found a nice Catholic nursing home to move into. I don't remember how long she lived there when she passed in her 80s. We never heard her linked to any drama or causing any headaches for anyone. Nice lady.
I have an old friend named Joe. Joe is in his early 80's, has an accounting firm, works full time, ski's with his kids in Colorado, rides a bicycle with me in the summertime, has a small sail boat that he competes with in races and keeps socially active as well. Joe is also involved in a new business start up. Joe is up to speed with technology, current events and is the friend I share my issues with.
My pa has. He’s in good shape and active for a 78 year old. He complains about getting old but naturally appears as someone 20 years younger. He’s aware and unafraid of his own mortality; he went to Vietnam as a young, angry man, never really expecting to make it back but by coffin, so since his 1967 discharge after a Tuberculosis stay at a Navy hospital stay, he’s always considered himself on borrowed time.
It will be devastating for me when he goes, but those sentiments will really make it easier.
I have an old friend named Joe. Joe is in his early 80's, has an accounting firm, works full time, ski's with his kids in Colorado, rides a bicycle with me in the summertime, has a small sail boat that he competes with in races and keeps socially active as well. Joe is also involved in a new business start up. Joe is up to speed with technology, current events and is the friend I share my issues with.
I want to be like Joe - when I grow up.....
Wow - still working full time in his 80s! And can still ski? That's a man who is keeping his mind and
body young! Good for him.
My pa has. He’s in good shape and active for a 78 year old. He complains about getting old but naturally appears as someone 20 years younger. He’s aware and unafraid of his own mortality; he went to Vietnam as a young, angry man, never really expecting to make it back but by coffin, so since his 1967 discharge after a Tuberculosis stay at a Navy hospital stay, he’s always considered himself on borrowed time.
It will be devastating for me when he goes, but those sentiments will really make it easier.
Always like hearing stories of a veteran doing well and living a long time!
Where my mother in law lives (a big senior apartment community) they have 100 year birthday parties every so often. The company has posted several stories about active involved individuals that are in their late 90s. My father got married at 87 and lived until 92. If he had not listened to his doctors, he would probably be here today. My former exercise instructor is 71 and my current one is around 68.
My dad died suddenly at age 79. When he died, he was actively volunteering for four organizations - a Job Corp organization (on the board), the local police department, the Civil Air Patrol, and the security detail at church. In fact, he had a stroke while he was at the range with the security detail, which I thought was a nice touch - doing something he loved with people he loved.
He had called me a few months before and told me "I don't feel comfortable driving at night," and that was fine with me. He and my mom had moved within minutes of me because I had promised to help them IF they moved where I lived (they had moved to another state several years before and I was sick of having to take all my vacation time to accommodate their increasing needs). I thought that was logical and thoughtful of both of them and it worked well for all of us.
My dad never missed a beat mentally. He also had a great sense of humor. He was affectionate and family and friends were always important to him. He remained active and vibrant and his death, while unexpected, was quick and relatively painless. He lived a good life and had a good death.
While it can't be easy (at all) becoming elderly, we often hear stories about their stubbornness, unwillingness
to make adjustments or compromises.
Does anyone have a story about an elderly person they know who adjusted accordingly?
My father (another story - ) had a cousin who never married. She worked as a bishop's secretary
for many years. She lived with her single brother in an apt. He died suddenly from a heart attack one day.
After that, she lived alone. She fell in the shower and broke her arm. After that happened, she made the decision it wasn't safe to live alone. I think she used some connections she had through the church and found a nice Catholic nursing home to move into. I don't remember how long she lived there when she passed in her 80s. We never heard her linked to any drama or causing any headaches for anyone. Nice lady.
Funny thing but I attribute your father's cousin's lack of stubbornness to being single. I'm a single, childless woman who will be aging alone. Because I don't have a spouse or children to fall back on, I can't afford to be stubborn or unwilling to change. Everything falls on me so I have to be willing to move into a nursing home, give up the car keys, use a walker, wear a Life Alert device, get home health aides, etc.
Unfortunately, those with families may take them for granted on an unconscious level. They can be stubborn because if anything were to happen, they have someone (spouse or children) who can "rescue" them.
I have a different view when labeling a person of many years of experience.
Stubborn? Nope, determined.
Stuck in old ways? Nope they have learned what works, they don't need to reinvent the wheel.
Angry? Sure, and they feel every other emotion too. It's called fine tuning and being okay with what works for them.
My aunt is recently widowed . She is resilient. She is also A ok, with not having to keep up with modern technology. She finds joy that is timeless. I think she has her act together. She knows what is important and values the days that are left. If ever a person would be justified in being angry at the hand dealt her...she'd be it.
Buried two husband and her only child. Lived in poverty and can squeeze a dime out of a penny. Yet she is determined (or as younger folks seem to label ' stubborn) to live in her values.
I stopped giving a dern in this age of ' be progressive!, Be willing to change with the times. Nope I'm fine in my skin and fine with decent manners. My iq isn't going to deter the end result.
So in closing... We should be so blessed to get to the point where ...good enough is..enough. this includes staying true to the tried and true.
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) had a cousin who never married. She worked as a bishop's secretary
