Quote:
Originally Posted by frosty_charge
Update: it's been 4 weeks now. She sleeps in our bedroom. Basically, has taken it over. During daytime, she watches her favorite shows from noon to nighttime in our living room. Basically, she has taken over every aspect of our 1 bedroom apartment. She's undergoing chemo too.
I've moved out to my parents and visit 2 days out of the week to help with the cleaning and hospital trips.
She plans to do all her chemo treatments at the same place. This has put an immense strain on our relationship.
MIL has never once asked me how I feel about this setup. And I feel like she gives my husband the okay to proceed with this scenario. I used to feel bad for her but now I resent her.
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Good job for keeping yourself "safe and healthy".
Wow, I can't imagine how much of a strain this is on your relationship with your husband. Unless your FIL is elderly, disabled and/or ill himself (and/or her own house would be unsafe for her), IMHO, it really is being a jerk to force his son to care for his wife. And, what about the SIL? I helped my husband through his Stage III cancer & chemotherapy. Both of our children were in college at the time. While they came home to visit I couldn't imagine putting the major responsibility of caring for their father on them when I was his wife.
You said that your MIL was "terminal" in your first post. Have you found out if this is really true? If so, do you think that your MIL plans to live on your apartment
forever (until her death)? I am living proof that Stage IV cancer is not always a death sentence (I'm three years cancer free and my oncologists are very optimistic that will continue).
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(Disclaimer: At the time that I was diagnosed with Stage IV cancer, I was the full time caregiver of my husband, who was disabled with dementia and a traumatic brain injury. Our adult son stepped up, as well as my brother, niece and many other friends and relatives, to help me through chemotherapy and surgery. My husband willingly went into a dementia facility (even though he would much rather continued living at home with me), because he knew that I was too sick to care for him 24/7 and care for myself. So, I understand that there
are situations where an adult child needs to step up instead of their spouse with cancer.)
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