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If she is sad and listless, then it is time to let her go, IMHO. I base my decisions on what my pet is feeling and she sounds like she is ready. It is the last, best thing you can do for her, to let her go without pain and in dignity. Cats are stoic and rarely show pain, by the way. When they do, it's because the pain is overwhelming. <<hugs>>
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Originally Posted by Fatty MacButter
It's such a personal choice, and if you seek advice and from a cat lover's forum such as this, you have to expect some emotional responses that may not be what you want to hear. That said, I've read of people who give their HEALTHY cats to the city shelter because they are tired of them. Plus, they will claim the cat is a stray to avoid intake fees! So I think you are to be commended for your efforts.
I second both of these. I especially want to point out again the part about cats going to great lengths to hide pain. This is instinctive behavior, and you have to watch them closely for signs of deterioration. I mean, I read through here and saw "Can't say she's happy...sad and lifeless...." I can certainly understand the feeling of "Is she really sick enough that I should be thinking about the end?" And while I certainly can't tell you that from here, I'm not at all certain (unlike a few other commenters) that it is not that time.
The idea that she improved with a load of treats and has been hanging on for a year is the only thing that gives me pause. I'm sure that among other behaviors is what gives you pause too. How often have you been back to the vet? Maybe another opinion from a different vet? With all the water drinking I can't help but think there could be undiagnosed CRF (kidney failure), even if the levels weren't bad a year ago, if she hasn't been retested since then all the more likely. I'm not a vet or anything, but we had a cat with CRF that went through a similar (not as long though) end stage. LOTS of drinking, hard to get her to eat, liquid poo with lots of cleanup, etc. She only lived for about 6 months from the initial CRF diagnosis, if I remember right. And still, at the end, it wasn't 100% certainty that it was time. I don't get this "You'll know for certain it's time" because it just isn't true in my experience.
What was 100% certain, though, is that the cat was not comfortable. Obvious pain or not (and always most likely NOT, as mentioned above), it's clear that if the cat is having liquid stool for months and months, that is not comfort, that is not quality of life. The cat may still be affectionate, as ours was. But it's not an indication of comfort, lack of distress, etc.
At this stage, there may not be anything that will be a huge improvement, but it doesn't hurt to try seeing a vet for options. Take her with the knowledge that the recommendation could in fact be euthanasia. I highly doubt that they will tell you they think it's too soon. It's so hard. Good luck.
I'm tired. She's tired. I really don't have the will to continue on like this, as my quality of home life has dropped dramatically in having to spend so much time cleaning and caring for her. I love her so much but I've made an appoitment to have her put to sleep on Friday. I guess I just want to know that it's ok to "give up", that other people have done this, and that I'm not missing out on some miracle cure they may have recently come up with.
Karen
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I would have taken her to another vet for a second opinion. When there's no help from one vet it's best to see another vet.
I sincerely want to thank those of you have took the time to share your thoughts about my situation. It's means a lot during this time of stress. I posted on this site in hopes others may share their similar experiences, thoughts, suggestions, and most of you have aided me a great deal.
Forums are ripe with dissention, so I understand those who do not share my opinion. I'm just VERY sensitive about this, so I can't really handle blatant character bashing. What I want to make clear, and which should be obvious since I'm taking the time to post this on a forum, is that I do care about my cat's well-being. But I am human, and I have emotional limits.
I did not know that cats suppress pain. That really broadens my perspective on the situation and I'm positive from her body language that she's been feeling some level of pain.... I just don't know how much.
Believe me, I thought she had some kind of kidney failure. A whole year off and on - well, 3/4 on - with severe diarrhea? I'm shocked she's still alive, to be honest. I chalk all the water she drinks up to the fact that her loose stool makes her dehydrated.
It has been a year since I've seen the vet, but that's because the only option left was the full time steroid. Prednisilone, I think? I already spent around $700 on tests and visits so I really couldn't afford the colon surgery where they take a sample to fully determine if it's IBD. The vet said there was a possibility it could be cancer....but by now I think that she would have passed if it was.
When I adopted Chloe she was 5 weeks old, infested with parasites and was about to put down by the vet. I coddled and medicated her every day (she had diarrhea at that time as well), and she eventually got better and has been my best friend and life companion since.
I'm seriously thinking I can't put her down this week. It's just soooo hard to make the decision. I'm very torn and am going to listen to my heart, soul and intuition for a little while to help fully determine what is best for her.
I want to send a big hug out to anyone else going through a similar situation with their best friend.
I just read through this thread, and my heart truly goes out to you. This is such a delicate and hard decision you are trying to make, and in my opinion, the HARDEST one we who love our "cat-kids" must sometimes make.
If I were you, I would "talk" with Chloe. You can. I know you know how to do it, for it is called love. See what Chloe says to you. Is she ready to leave? Is she waiting for you to stumble upon something that could help her regain her quality of life back?
Yes, you are tired, and I empathize fully with you. Yet, we must put our beloved angel's needs first, above and beyond our own. I have 15 special needs beloved angels in my home, and yes, there are days, that I burst into tears for all the agony, work, and exhaustion I am experiencing. Yes, I understand where you are coming from.
You will know beyond a shadow of a doubt what your next step with Chloe is. I feel badly about some of the responses here, but this is an emotional topic, one that some people will react as they did. They meant you no harm, so please, don't be angry with them. No one here can or should tell you what to do in this situation. It is up to you, and only you.
I pray deep peace over you and Chloe, in order for you to "hear" what Chloe has to say. Namaste.
,,,,,,,,,,Forums are ripe with dissention, so I understand those who do not share my opinion. I'm just VERY sensitive about this, so I can't really handle blatant character bashing. What I want to make clear, and which should be obvious since I'm taking the time to post this on a forum, is that I do care about my cat's well-being. But I am human, and I have emotional limits.,,,,.
I do not think us pet people are all that different. It is very hard for us to really have the conversation we want online without the gestures and facial expressions needed. Plus our emotions are screwed up as we type, too often in tears. We type trying to include all the important facts and lose so much.
Now throw in caring readers who deeply care about animals. I see this in many pet forums.
I would talk to Chloe, try to listen to her. She will tell you when it is time.
wanderlustgyrl
Ferretkona has it right - this is an emotional issue and drums up emotions tied to the past, present, and future. Even those who recommend holding on for as long as possible can understand the pain of losing someone they love - we're all here for you.
My heart will be with you and Chloe, regardless of the path you and Chloe choose to take.
wanderlustygyrl: It's very hard. I've been there several times. To me, it's all a 'quality of life' issue. I hate to say it, but you're the only one who can decide. You're the one who has the most information by far.
I am so sorry for you. My thoughts are with you both. You may feel worse for a while afterward with a good amount of guilt thrown in but she will be thankful she can run and play again over the bridge.
I found it great to get another one as soon as I was ready to start over.
Best of luck. It is over in mere seconds with no struggle. I brought his favorite blanket and had everything ready including tissues, the techs were so sweet, even offered to drive me home but I made it.
You and she both deserve better. You are not giving up, just giving a release. She has been lucky to have you.
Thank you all again so much. Your wise and kind words have given me much to think about.
I've decided to spend this weekend with Chloe, really listening to her and reading her body language, and letting her know she is loved and that everything will be ok (I think I need that more than she does).
Even if "right now" isn't her time, I know that she is close. She is tired. I need to be strong for her, and that means making tough decisions. Maybe I'm the one reluctant to let go, not her.
I'll keep you posted and in my thoughts.
And yes I'll give Chloe a pet for you
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It's so hard. Good luck.
