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She is 15 months old and sometimes seems bored/sleeps a lot, and also climbs on my lap a lot when I am working from home. I give her lots of attention but I thought she'd appreciate a companion to run and play with. So three days ago I got a 9 month old female shelter cat. They said the cat was shy and had been returned by someone else who adopted her because of "behavior." I think they had kids and a chaotic household and she hid and maybe didn't like the kids messing with her.
Well, the shelter cat is adorable and affectionate and purrs a lot and the only behavior problem I have seen is she thinks the dining table place mats are the perfect place to lounge - um, no! She doesn't act like she is shy. She acts like she owns the place. Made herself right at home the second day, explores the whole house, flops down and makes herself comfortable.
BUT she and my cat don't get along. They don't just hiss at each other, they attack. At first I thought it was my cat being the aggressor but the more I watch, the more I see it is both of them but often it is the shelter cat that seeks my cat out and goes after her, chases her, attacks her. My cat acts like a big sissy with her ears flat at times. When I yell the shelter cat will run away and it breaks up the fight, but I wouldn't dare leave them alone in the house at this point. I spend a lot of time reassuring my cat, but I also don't shower affection on either one of them in front of the other. And my kitty has been so good through all of this.
My husband thinks if I just leave them alone they will be fine. I'm not so sure. I don't want my cat to feel bullied and scared in her own home. The shelter said if it doesn't work out we can bring the shelter cat back within 30 days. I hate to take her back to the shelter, especially when she's already been returned once. I think she'd be a great kitty in a household where she was the only cat.
Have any of you experienced this and it turned out to be okay? I guess I shouldn't have assumed my cat wanted a companion. I don't think she does. Any suggestions?
PS - I did keep them completely separate at first and I still put the shelter cat in a closed room at night, which she seems okay with. She just explores that room and curls up and sleeps; doesn't complain or ask to get out. But during the day I have been letting her roam the house and they stay mostly in separate areas.
Three days is WAY too soon for making a major decision. What needed to have happened was for the new addition to be confined to a separate space and gradually introduced to the incumbent cat, who is justifiably upset over the territorial incursion. I think it's still not too late for this to be done. Hopefully there's an area within the home which can stay closed off and includes plenty of room for the necessities of life: sleeping place, food and water, some toys, a litter box. Devote sufficient quality time to each feline individually. The two are obviously well aware of each other already - the proverbial horse is out of the barn. But the OK ("original kitty" lol) can regain the sense of the house's being hers if the newbie stays in one place for at least a week, then is slowly but surely reintroduced to the "big picture" under human supervision. As for supremacy battles, the alpha-cat clashes will likely continue for a longer period but will inevitably die down over time.
Put the new kitty in a room the old kitty cannot go in to. Feed both cats near either side of the door. New kitty in the room, old kitty just outside of the room, at the same time.
This way they will start to associate each others scent with a good thing....food!
I would do that for a few days and then switch to maybe a baby gate or something higher where they can see each other but not get to each other.
Do the feeding thing on either side again.
There will be some hisses and growls and it will take a little time. Mine were ok in a short amount of time.
Oh also,every once in a while switch the cats. Put the old cat in the room and the new cat outside of the room. This way they can get used to each others scent. Also put something each cat has laid on in the area where the other kitty is.
As others have said, you're expecting results too soon. If you're lucky, it could take weeks, if not.... months for them to accept each other and coexist peacefully. They could also surprise you & become best buds... no way to tell. Pikantari gave excellent advice about separate space, feeding ritual, site & scent swapping, etc. (I would also suggest play sessions together if that's possible). So follow that and have patience. They will most likely work it out with your help.
Also, if either one is a tree dweller, try to give them vertical space to own if/when they are out and about the house together. I know from experience that can make all the difference in the world. I have 4 senior females that have never really liked each other, but have lived together peacefully (for the most part) for many years. A big part of that has been the numerous high up spaces available to them when they needed it.
Just be patient, work with them, and give them time to adjust.
The ideas above are good, and ITA that you need much more time to integrate. Whatever you do, don't just "leave them alone" like your husband suggests!
I wanted to add that Feliway diffusers might be helpful for both cats, but especially your resident cat.
Okay. I guess I was doing the right thing, kept them separate at first, but just tried to rush it. I put some of my cat's stuff in the new kitty's room and vice versa so they could get used to each other's smells. I guess I just tried to integrate them too soon. That's partly because the new kitty's room is my office, and when I am working my resident kitty would definitely get upset if I went in there with the new kitty and shut the door and shut her out. So I may need to find a new room for the new kitty. I just feel bad keeping her confined to one room for more than a day or two...
My resident kitty is ALWAYS on the top level of her cat tree. The shelter cat jumped up on the bottom level today to look out the window, and of course that didn't go over very well. I need to get another cat tree I guess.
Okay. I guess I was doing the right thing, kept them separate at first, but just tried to rush it. I put some of my cat's stuff in the new kitty's room and vice versa so they could get used to each other's smells. I guess I just tried to integrate them too soon. That's partly because the new kitty's room is my office, and when I am working my resident kitty would definitely get upset if I went in there with the new kitty and shut the door and shut her out. So I may need to find a new room for the new kitty. I just feel bad keeping her confined to one room for more than a day or two...
My resident kitty is ALWAYS on the top level of her cat tree. The shelter cat jumped up on the bottom level today to look out the window, and of course that didn't go over very well. I need to get another cat tree I guess.
Use that as an opportunity to site swap. Let your resident kitty be in there with you, while the new one is in the other part of the house.
And yeah, you might want to get a second cat tree. Something else to keep in mind about high up spaces- make sure there is always an alternate 'escape' route from them (if possible).... a way for them to jump down without jumping on one another. In other words, no 'dead ends'.
Use that as an opportunity to site swap. Let your resident kitty be in there with you, while the new one is in the other part of the house.
And yeah, you might want to get a second cat tree. Something else to keep in mind about high up spaces- make sure there is always an alternate 'escape' route from them (if possible).... a way for them to jump down without jumping on one another. In other words, no 'dead ends'.
Thanks. I saw your post this afternoon and thought it was a good idea and tried it. My resident cat got a little restless being in the office, I think wondering what the new one was up to in her territory. But it seemed to work out pretty well. I will try it again tomorrow.
Is it a good sign that they don't seem to mind using each other's litter box and eating each other's food? I thought they wouldn't want to share their food or litter box, but they both have been using both litter boxes and I have their food separate and they eat each other's food. And no fights over either of those things, although they don't do it while the other one is standing right there, either.
Thanks. I saw your post this afternoon and thought it was a good idea and tried it. My resident cat got a little restless being in the office, I think wondering what the new one was up to in her territory. But it seemed to work out pretty well. I will try it again tomorrow.
Is it a good sign that they don't seem to mind using each other's litter box and eating each other's food? I thought they wouldn't want to share their food or litter box, but they both have been using both litter boxes and I have their food separate and they eat each other's food. And no fights over either of those things, although they don't do it while the other one is standing right there, either.
These are all good signs! Continue what you're doing and monitor's each cat's reaction.
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Any suggestions?
