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adribach - I'm agreeing with everyone that a vet check is necessary when there's a sudden behavior change to rule in or out some sort of medical condition.
In the meantime, since it seems touching or the appearance that a touch is coming is what sets off your cat, your daughter may try this: not moving if he approaches her or just letting him sit on her lap if he jumps up. For whatever reason it sounds like he doesn't mind sharing the same space, but it's the "reach out" or forward motion toward him that he reacts to.
If it turns out not to be medical and is behavioral, there could be a variety of reasons of why he hisses and swats just your daughter. These reasons can be caused by something that occurred when your daughter just happened to be nearby and he associates her with the reason even though she did nothing!
If it is behavioral then the "treatment" is to help the cat associate good things with your daughter like treats or play. Initially I wouldn't recommend that she hand him a treat, but to place it on the floor near her and let him come get it. With play, use a feather/toy on a fishing pole so that the toy becomes an extension of her arm.
My 6 year old neutered female cat has started hissing at my partner and the kids we have recently moved in together ans she seemed to hide at first and now she comes out but lately she is hissing when anyone apart from myself go anywhere near her ..if its just me she comes and snuggles up and lets me pet her and rub her tummy ..ive bought the diffusers to help her calm and not be so afraid im so worried how can i stop her feeling so stressed out
My 6 year old neutered female cat has started hissing at my partner and the kids we have recently moved in together ans she seemed to hide at first and now she comes out but lately she is hissing when anyone apart from myself go anywhere near her ..if its just me she comes and snuggles up and lets me pet her and rub her tummy ..ive bought the diffusers to help her calm and not be so afraid im so worried how can i stop her feeling so stressed out
My advice is to keep everything as routine as possible, first of all. If the cat can observe that the same things happen at the same times, every day, it will help her to feel safe. Cats love routine! And make sure she has a safe place to go away from the kids, especially if they are small, loud, running around age kids.
Some cats prefer to hide under things, and some prefer to be up high, out of reach. So either a tall cat tree, or a nice spot under the bed or in a closet or something, is good, and tell the kids if she goes to her safe place, you LEAVE HER ALONE. Do not bother her. She wants some quiet. The worst thing is when a cat cannot escape whatever is making them feel unsafe. Also make sure that the food and the litterbox are in places where she will not be disturbed or frightened.
My cat does not like children. My sons were already older kids when we got him, they were not loud or running around, they could sit still. If we've had kids visit, he would hide and not come out until they are gone. If adults visit, they just sit in the living room, and he'll eventually come out and investigate, but he doesn't want the strangers to touch him or give him much attention. All of this totally makes sense, cats often feel unsafe when big changes happen, and it can take them a while to get used to new situations, new people, and it's even worse when things are suddenly very loud and stimulating and unpredictable.
Sonic_Spork ... excellent info and advice. I echo everything you wrote. Mharib14 ... many of us have experienced the same kind of thing. Although it's really hard for kids not to want to approach and play with a cat, if they are old enough to understand that they can help your cat by letting her observe undisturbed, the kids can feel important that their behavior (ignoring her and letting her watch them) will play a huge part. Maybe they can take on the role of "animal behaviorist" by keeping track of changes such as last week she observed them from under a chair and this week from a sitting spot in the open 10' away ... things like that. Just know that each cat has his/her own time table - some cats will come around quickly while others can take weeks or even months. This is all normal and just requires patience!
Another thought on cat not liking the kids. Besides the obvious kids are noisy do the kids have a pet at their home. Maybe doesn't like the smell of another cat or dog invading it's space.
My cat is all over my son when he comes home from a friend's home and lays on his clothes and coats when he comes from there. He told me his friends cats are all over him when he goes there and scent mark him practically the whole time he is there. Guess they are sending secret messages back and forth through my son. Have to wonder what would happen if the cats ever met face to face.
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