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Hey,
I am a 27 year old male who moved out of the nest a several years ago. I grew up with dogs and cats and left them behind when I moved 2,000 miles away from home to better myself. I visit my parents about once a year, and to be honest, I am more excited to see the pets then the humans! I live a lone in 1 bedroom apartment, and I have thought about getting a cat to keep me company.
Whenever I think about getting a cat, a sadness comes over me as I think about mine 2,000 miles away from home and feel as if I am somehow "replacing" them. I have thought about bringing one down here with me, but I do not want to separate any of them (there are about 5 of them), nor do I want to take them out of their environment and home. Besides, which one would I pick? Its like picking your favorite child.
Am I crazy? I guess I need someone to talk through this. I have told my parents this, and they think I am thinking into it too much, but also do not want me to get a cat. They tell me how much work it is and how much money, but I feel I can afford a cat and it wouldn't be too much work. I feel cats are independent enough that they would not mind that I am away during the day at work, right?
If I were to get a cat, I think I would get an adult one that is already house trained. A cat that is friendly and likes to cuddle (ideally), a cat that would like to just hang out with me.
Here is my advice. Leave the ones at your Parents place where they are, they are established there and it would not be good to uproot them at this stage in their lives. You would not be "replacing" them with another cat, you would simply be getting one of your own.
As for if you should adopt or not, a pet is a lifetime obligation and investment. Are you stable enough in your life to commit to being able to care for your furbuddy for maybe the next 15 or so years ? So often, younger people think a pet would be cool but then their life changes and the poor pet suffers. We see them where I live from time to time where the person moves and just puts the poor cat out to fend for itself.
If you think you can do it, yes, a cat is perfectly happy being alone while we work. Most of us have jobs and we leave in the morning and come back after work. Our cats usually entertain themselves and sleep while we are away, but they want our attention when we get home. Problem with younger people is they want to go out and party when they get home so the cat ends up being alone more than just the time you are at work. That can be a not so good life for a cat.
But if you do want to do it I think an adult cat is a wise choice. First of all, they get passed over in the adoption process because kittens are "cuter". They also have all the craziness out of the way that kittens have so they are easier to live with most times. I would start going to shelters and spending some time with the cats there. DO NOT GET ONE THE FIRST VISIT. After a few visits you will find one that you are very comfortable with and who is comfortable with you. Make your decision based on that time spent together and you will have a better chance of picking the right one.
My one Son adopted a new adult cat a couple of years ago, and he went to the place and played with it 3 times before he committed to adopting her. After that time he felt they were a match and he was right, his cat is perfect for his lifestyle and they get along great.
You have the perfect plan. Adopting an adult is ideal for your situation. It's obvious you know what's involved with owning a cat, and you know it's a lifetime commitment. Don't feel guilty that you're replacing your pets. They are 2,000 miles away. It's not like you'll see them less because you have a pet of your own. You'll still see them once a year. Just your feeling that way shows how much you bond and love your pets. I have no doubt you'll be a responsible cat owner. Just make sure you can handle the financial aspect, which includes food, litter, vet appointments and some type of arrangements for while you are visiting home once a year.
I agree with the others. An adult is a great choice, and you won't be disloyal to your childhood pets. Go to the shelter, and see how many cats need a home of their own. They are starved for affection, and I think you'll see you're doing the right thing in about five minutes, if that. Then the problem will be narrowing it down to just one... or two. If you have the means, taking two cats who are friends with each other would be even better!
If you grew up with cats and cared for them you know how much work is involved, and unlike dogs there isn't much - clean litter, water and food. You don't need to walk them and interaction is dependent on the cat, some like more than others. All need some one-on-one but each cat will let you know their preference. My guys range from dog like affection to 'I want to be alone-uh-but not too far!' LOL Orion likes to be near, in the same room but not plastered on me. Joe would be fine being petted or played with 24/7 like a dog.
Their food and litter can be expensive if you go for organic food but if you're ok with less expensive food, no judgment here, that won't break the bank. Same with litter, depends on what you choose. And litter pans rarely need replacement and aren't a huge investment either. Now vet bills can be a concern but you can purchase insurance, did you consider that? For a young healthy cat it isn't expensive, as the cat ages it might increase. Or, you could budget and set aside money for the fees and unexpected expenses. Orion had dental problems and it cost almost $1,000 for extractions. He's 12 and never had any other real issues, ear mites once but other than that the only other reason he's been to the vet was annual visits.
Toys are simple, the worlds BEST cat toy is an empty box. Next is often a balled up piece of paper, my guys love palm fronds but are terrified of empty bags of any kind but most cats adore them too. You probably know this having grown up with cats, I'm brainstorming and hoping to offer another view from your parents.
Since you live alone I think having a cat would be helpful to you and as a young adult it will help your development. It would be a win-win especially if you choose to adopt.
I hope you find a fur friend and have a wonderful life together,
I would only ask you to consider what you would do with your new cat when you go back to visit your family. Do you have a close friend who can come in to feed, water, change litter ? Can you afford to have a pet sitting service come in every day ? As long as you can plan ahead for cat care when you're gone, you will be a great cat owner.
Visit shelters. Not only are there plenty of adult cats, you'll also find plenty of cats who prefer to be the only pet or the only cat. It shouldn't be too hard to find just the right cat. Work with the shelter workers. Tell them what you want,then look at those they suggest.
I ended up dating and moving in with a long-term gf a few months after hit post. My gf has a cat, and we decided to adopt one from a shelter so he would have a "friend" when we were gone to work. It was a very good decision, as the cats bring great joy and happiness to both our lives.
I ended up dating and moving in with a long-term gf a few months after hit post. My gf has a cat, and we decided to adopt one from a shelter so he would have a "friend" when we were gone to work. It was a very good decision, as the cats bring great joy and happiness to both our lives.
Oh, I saw that you updated.. sounds like it worked out really well for you guys and both kitties. Yes, I learned after having gotten my first cat, then ending up working a lot of overtime, that it was important to get him a playmate, which luckily, worked out great. I have had four cats total over time.
I'm sure you must know since you had cats at home, but some need to know that cats are not all the same or that they all get along, having different personalities, as people do. Some are more snuggly, too. I only had one that was pre-owned that I got sort of short-notice, having found she had been in foster homes and needed a better place to go. She was sweet, but did have some issues and my male cats didn't adapt well to her, but of course I kept her. (They have passed on...I miss them and loved them all so much).
I just have one kitty now, being home more these days and would not be without...I love being a pet owner and they are such good company, as you know. I like hearing about those having established pet relationships while growing up. We had family dog and I love dogs too, but having been in apartments, only cats have been allowed and glad I got to know of them, not having had a cat when growing up.
Last edited by In2itive_1; 03-27-2016 at 03:34 AM..
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