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I love all three of my cats, but I'm having trouble convincing them to get along.
I was acquired by the first two while they were kittens, and they've since grown lazy and fat and adorable. I like them so much that I allowed a third cat to make its way into what used to be my home.
The people at the animal shelter insisted that I get a cat that is good at getting along with other cats, and so I did. The new cat is perfectly sweet and kind, if a little shy. The problem is that the first two cats don't trust her at all.
For weeks, I kept them all in separate rooms, though I swapped some of their toys and furniture around to try to get them used to each other's smell. That helped cure the new cat of her shyness, but the other are still mean to her. They haven't actually fought yet, but they sometimes make growling noises at her, and she'll occasionally swat at them with her paw to make them back off.
Do I just need to be more patient? Is this a problem that will resolve itself eventually? Is there a risk involved if I leave them alone together?
Location: Los Angeles>Little Rock>Houston>Little Rock
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One of my cats doesn't like the newest addition and it has been 4 months. The younger is just too spunky and chases the older one. During quiet time they are fine together and sleep next to each other on the bed. Just give it time and they will be fine.
I love all three of my cats, but I'm having trouble convincing them to get along.
I was acquired by the first two while they were kittens, and they've since grown lazy and fat and adorable. I like them so much that I allowed a third cat to make its way into what used to be my home.
The people at the animal shelter insisted that I get a cat that is good at getting along with other cats, and so I did. The new cat is perfectly sweet and kind, if a little shy. The problem is that the first two cats don't trust her at all.
For weeks, I kept them all in separate rooms, though I swapped some of their toys and furniture around to try to get them used to each other's smell. That helped cure the new cat of her shyness, but the other are still mean to her. They haven't actually fought yet, but they sometimes make growling noises at her, and she'll occasionally swat at them with her paw to make them back off.
Do I just need to be more patient? Is this a problem that will resolve itself eventually? Is there a risk involved if I leave them alone together?
Hard to tell really. Sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn't. Years ago I had to rehome one of mine because she did not get along with my other cats. She went to a home where she was the only cat and was much happier.
How many weeks has it been? If it's been a few months then I'm guessing it may not work. If it's only been a few weeks, I'd give it some more time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by maggie2101
One of my cats doesn't like the newest addition and it has been 4 months. The younger is just too spunky and chases the older one. During quiet time they are fine together and sleep next to each other on the bed. Just give it time and they will be fine.
I leave them alone together without a thought.
Doesn't sound like the OP's cats are fine together at any time. It sounds like a totally different dynamic at her house. Glad it worked out for you but it doesn't always.
OP I would NOT leave yours alone together at this point. They could fight and someone could be seriously injured.
I am a firm believer that cats has to work things out for themselves. I rarely step in between. Usually I will just say, "Be nice." They have to figure out their pecking order and you have to let them.
When we first got Andy, our old lady Brandy disliked him intensely. They would go at each other-I'm talking fur flying-it was awful. When they stopped to catch their breath, Brandy, who was declawed and scrawny thanks to a lot of heath issues, was towering over Andy, who was fat and had his claws would be cowering in a corner. You knew who Alpha was. They finally chilled but still didn't like each other. But, Andy was totally innocent. One day, he was sitting on a chair. Brandy walked by and Andy took a swipe at her and then acted like he didn't do anything. lol.
Electra & Elvira were never cuddly to each other. I blame that on Brandy. Electra was a baby when she came to live with us and Brandy wasn't very maternal nor much in the way of a cuddlier. So, Electra never learned to be. Then when Elvira showed up, Electra didn't teach her because Brandy didn't teach Electra. But, Andy would play with Elvira until he joined Brandy and crossed the Rainbow Bridge.
When it was just Electra & Elvira, I can never tell if they are playing or fighting. I think the problem is they both want to be Alpha. There are many times when Electra will be sitting next to me and Elvira will be sleeping across the room. Electra will get up, go over to Elvira and the two of them will get into a tiff. Then Electra will walk away.
Last year when we got Josette, I was hoping that she would just curl up with the other two but of course that didn't happen. I see pics of cats cuddling with each other and wish that mine would but, nope. They will cuddle with me but not each other. It is obvious that Josette is last kitty on the totem pole. I don't see Electra inserting her "Alphaness" onto Josette but I see Elvira doing it. She will bite Josette on the backside just to show her who is boss. Yet, I do see the two of them playing together once in a while.
Lily my 12 year old is the Empress.........I had her for 9 years before I took in Charcoal. All he wanted to do is play.......but Lily didn't play.......doesn't play.......and never will play. She's the Empress.
Now I have the little boys (15 months old) who were born in my laundry room. Charcoal loves his little brothers to bits and they love him.
And the Empress is delighted not to be bothered with any of them.
Now when I had Momma kitty.......she and Lily co-existed peacefully.......with each taking their own corner of my bed quietly.
Growling and swatting is nothing serious. It's just feline communication. It's only been a couple of weeks? They'll be fine.
Things to do:
Make sure you have enough elevated spaces for three cats.
Four litter boxes.
Everyone should have his or her own dish, and own meal spot. Feed meals on schedule.
Diet matters. The better the diet, the better the behavior of the cat. Feed canned foods that don't have a lot of junk in them, or a raw diet.
PS Fat cats are not healthy cats. They will feel better and act better if they lose some weight. Again, that goes back to diet and feeding a good quality low carb canned diet (or raw) measured portions, on a schedule.
Feliway plug in diffusers can help with stress and territorial feelings.
I got a kitten after an older cat passed away. I figured my female, who was 6 at the time, would be lonely and would get along better with a small kitten than an adult. The female was NOT happy at all. She would hiss at him every time she saw him. I had never seen her like this. As the male got bigger, he would try to play with the female and she hissed and growled at him. I used Feliway and that seemed to help.
I suspected that they got along fine when they were alone together. It was human attention that sparked jealousy. It took a LONG time for them to get along well and happened gradually over a period of probably 6 or 8 months. Of course, I was attached to the kitten after a few weeks, so I had no choice but to be patient.
You can borrow one of her books from the library . .
Things were going ok with my two - and then headed south and I was thankful I was home as my very sweet boy had his teeth in my little girl's neck and the look on her face was help me mommie . . .
It broke my heart but my little boy went back to the shelter where he was adopted almost immediately and my little girl was happiest being the "one and only" again.
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