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Old 02-12-2014, 12:54 PM
 
14,802 posts, read 17,560,693 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by treesgreen View Post
$400 per month on average.

They expect you to pay most of the bills, help her with her debt, you will always pay when you both go out, you might have to help her mom with her bills, you will have to pay for the ring and half the wedding cost plus if it doesn't work out you will be taken to the cleaners. While paying for all that you will still be expected to help cook and clean and you will have to beg for sex especially if she is sleepy and/or mad at you...GENERALLY

doesn't this sound like a great deal for men

It is cheaper to rent instead of buying
I think it's closer to $2000/month. The cost to maintain a boyfriend is like $1000/month.
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Old 02-12-2014, 12:58 PM
 
106 posts, read 154,736 times
Reputation: 61
^^

I had the cheapest possible price lol
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Old 02-12-2014, 01:04 PM
 
Location: River North, Chicago, Illinois
4,620 posts, read 8,115,485 times
Reputation: 6321
Quote:
Originally Posted by NARFALICIOUS View Post
Can people stop saying the word escort. They're prostitutes.
You can get and keep a girlfriend using any of the three "C"s - Creativity (which includes intelligence), Confidence or Cash. Generally speaking, I think the most interesting girls are the ones who respond best to creativity, but there are plenty of interesting women who will respond to each of those categories. There is a small subset of women who respond best to the fourth "C", which I'll leave unnamed, but it's a pretty small subset.

If you have all three, you'll end up with perfection because you can choose any girl, but any one of the three will let you date well in a big city.

That you're focused on the cost tells me that you don't have enough of any of the three Cs, so you're going to have a hard time of it. There are still women out there for you as long as you're not pathologically misogynistic, but you'll have to put in a lot more legwork. If you're pathologically misogynistic, please don't date (neither women nor men).

The same generally applies to non-hetero relationships, too.
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Old 02-12-2014, 01:14 PM
 
11,973 posts, read 31,633,522 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jonnynonos View Post
You're guaranteed to "get something" all right!
Yep, and probably dealing with a woman who has been trafficked or is under some other duress. It's barely better than going out and raping someone.

I think the OP needs to worry more about maintaining his own soul if he is alright with taking advantage of people in this manner.
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Old 02-12-2014, 01:50 PM
 
106 posts, read 154,736 times
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Good luck.

Last edited by treesgreen; 02-12-2014 at 02:21 PM..
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Old 02-12-2014, 02:25 PM
 
Location: FIN
888 posts, read 1,585,215 times
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Perhaps you need to consider looking into the bargain bin..?
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Old 02-12-2014, 02:56 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles, CA
555 posts, read 799,360 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by koctail View Post
Being somewhat frugal, I have never had much success with Chicago women. A big problem I have is the cost to keep one happy. For example, a typical weekend involves:

- Cab rides
- Shows/Concert tickets
- Fancy dinners/meals with wine
- More fancy drinks at bars/lounges/clubs

I am sure there is more to add, but that is what comes to mind. So a typical weekend you are easily out a few hundred dollars, plus all the time you wasted on things you may not enjoy. Hardly worth it IMO. Better to stick with escorts and get something guaranteed without wasting your time..
Going to take this post at face value and consider it sincere. OP, it sounds like you're primarily concerned with sex ("get something guaranteed"). Why not consider a friends with benefits situation instead of an escort service? Think of it as a barter. It's free. Or if you go out, you could split the cost.

Really, it's not that hard to get sex if that's what you're looking for. Plenty of women (and men) out there who just want to get it on. Some are attractive, others less so. Some are nice, others less so. I mean, it runs the gamut. It can't be that hard that you actually have to pay someone to spend time with you.

Of course, if you want the high maintenance girlfriend (as opposed to just someone for sex), then you'll have to pay the price. But keep in mind, you, too, may need to keep up your own appearances. Quite often, though not always, high maintenance girlfriends require men to keep up their appearances in the form of looks, clothes, and accessories (shoes, watch, car, fancy shindigs, fancy meals). That may double the costs mentioned, unless you already go the fancy route yourself.

Say, have you considered a sugar mama? Some women just want sex and are willing to pamper their man, pay for meals, lavish outings, etc. Not every woman wants a relationship. Of course, you would then be at their beck and call. Not bad, but perhaps not for everyone.

Should disclose I am not a Chicago woman, though I do feel women are by and large the same wherever you go, with some regional differences thrown in for variety, which is why I responded.

Best of luck to you.
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Old 02-12-2014, 03:27 PM
 
Location: Upper West Side, Manhattan, NYC
15,331 posts, read 23,762,089 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sydlee View Post
Of course, if you want the high maintenance girlfriend (as opposed to just someone for sex), then you'll have to pay the price. But keep in mind, you, too, may need to keep up your own appearances. Quite often, though not always, high maintenance girlfriends require men to keep up their appearances in the form of looks, clothes, and accessories (shoes, watch, car, fancy shindigs, fancy meals). That may double the costs mentioned, unless you already go the fancy route yourself.
Very true and that gets lost in it for a lot of guys. If you don't already do this and want a "hot" girlfriend who is up on her fashion and what not, there's a 95% chance she'll want you to make an effort too. That's been my experience at least and you're absolutely right in saying that it may add to the costs. It may seem shallow, but more and more women in their 20s and 30s care about how men look and dress in this country. I thought my friend was joking once who said she could never date a guy who didn't have some awareness of this stuff and would literally not date someone if they wore tennis shoes as their normal shoes. Sad, but true.
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Old 02-12-2014, 03:31 PM
 
11,973 posts, read 31,633,522 times
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I think this thread may break the city-data forum record for uses of the word "fancy".
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Old 02-12-2014, 04:34 PM
 
Location: Los Angeles, CA
555 posts, read 799,360 times
Reputation: 1173
Quote:
Originally Posted by marothisu View Post
Very true and that gets lost in it for a lot of guys. If you don't already do this and want a "hot" girlfriend who is up on her fashion and what not, there's a 95% chance she'll want you to make an effort too. That's been my experience at least and you're absolutely right in saying that it may add to the costs. It may seem shallow, but more and more women in their 20s and 30s care about how men look and dress in this country. I thought my friend was joking once who said she could never date a guy who didn't have some awareness of this stuff and would literally not date someone if they wore tennis shoes as their normal shoes. Sad, but true.
On a similar, very hetero note, a friend of mine stopped seeing a guy because he had a roommate. This was the Silicon Valley, where rents can be quite high. My friend was living in her own one-bedroom apartment in a swank little town in the area. She said since she could afford a one-bedroom apt, therefore, he, too, should be able to afford something similar. She figured she was doing well for herself, and that anyone she dated also should be doing equally well -- if not more so.

To date anyone less would be to disrespect herself and all the hard work she'd put into her career and life. And she did work hard -- came from a family that struggled to make ends meet, put herself through Ivy League undergrad and grad school by working all the time, later worked long hours at several tech startups.

The funny thing was he had stock options galore from a tech company that eventually went public and made him lots of money -- more than her stock options. She knew this, but that wasn't enough for her. She needed someone who "presented" well to her peers in all respects: his own apartment, maybe has his own successful startup, tailored clothes, "real" (non-sneaker) shoes, a more professional, well-tended appearance, i.e. a man who "takes care of himself"/"appreciates the finer things in life." Makes sense, right? Cuz if he appreciates the finer things, and he's with her, then therefore, she must be one of those finer things, right? Her value shoots up in the eyes of society and her peers. It's not that different from a man who insists on being only with women deemed hot by his male peers. His value increases as well.

Women these days make their own money, have their own careers, and whatnot. In places where women are considered similar high achievers/go-getters, you're going to have a situation where the women, as men have always done: demand more of their potential dates. For some women, it's not enough for a man just to be a good guy and bring home the bacon, since she knows how to do that herself (and she can hire out/barter for sex if that's all she wants, just like men). I'm sure not all Silicon Valley hetero women are like this. I'll wager, though, that women are somewhat similar throughout much of America's metropolitan areas, including Chicago.

There. I used "swank" instead of "fancy." ;-)

Sorry to go on about this. I know it's not specific to OP's question, though I think in a roundabout way, it's related (i.e. how much do you have to invest monetarily to have and hold onto a girlfriend).
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