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I am originally from Ohio, and my parents live in Indy for a while, before I moved here to "the city", so I know the type of town you are living in. Some advice:
1. It seems you want the walkable, street life that the city offers, as opposed to the burbs of the city. But here in the city, while very fun, if you do not have things set up JUST RIGHT (NICE apartment - which is VERY EXPENSIVE, with parking, and a job downtown), it will be VERY stressful and you will find that you wont have the time or the money or the energy to do the things that make living in Lakeview/Lincoln park/Wicker Park etc, fun. What I found, from living here, is that you have to configure your life in a very, very specific way, in order to feel plugged in to things and part of the action. And it gets VERY expensive to maintain that configuration. For example, I am renting a brand new place, 2 bedrooms/2 baths, for $2000 a month...with NO PARKING!! I have to park on the street, and dig myself out of the snow, in the winter. You will want to live somewhere nice, there are a lot of dumps here, and the dumpy places do not have things like dishwashers and in-unit laundry. Not sure of your financial situation, or career point, but raising a child here in the nice areas of town is very stressful, you have A LOT of parking hassles, traffic problems during the summer because of Cubs games. Also - a few years ago, I was walking up Broadway, and as I walked past the CVS, a woman pushing a stroller, sat down on the bench, while talking on her cellphone, and said: "<sigh>...this is no place to raise a child". True story.
2. Most of the straight guys living here in the city, or at least the ones worth dating, tend to be in their 20's and have lots of dating options and most probably would not consider seriously dating a woman with a child. There is nothing wrong with having children but most guys want to share that experience with the person they marry and to be blunt, they also do not want to raise another man's kid. Plus, the fact that your child needs to be factored into your plans and dates etc, most guys dont want their fun and flexibility to be limited by another man's child. Suburban guys might be more open to that, but most city guys want to go out just whenever they want to.
3. If you are open to the burbs, here, they are going to be just like the burbs in Indy (carmel, etc) except they are a lot more expensive, with a lot of traffic. Many of Chicago's burbs, even the more affluent ones, tend to be very tacky and have a very unfriendly vibe. So if you are open to the burbs, I would recommend just staying put in Indy, and try different strategies and tactics to meet guys.
4. Chicago has a huge gender imbalance, there are a LOT more women here than men. A LOT. You WILL have a lot of competition. I have travelled a lot, and the women here are some of the best looking women in the country. A suggestion: Look into Austin TX. WAY more men there than women. And the men there tend to be more highly educated (not as many bubbas). Not quite as walkable as Chicago (but better than Indy), and they have great weather and it tends to be more child-friendly.
Just my .02. Good luck!
Many people are raising kids in the city (myself included). It's not as difficult as you are making it out to be. Schools are the primary issue, and this is unlikely to change in the near future. You spend a lot of time complaining about parking, but there is an easy solution: Get a parking space. I know a LOT of parents living in the city, and they all have parking. It's almost a necessity with kids, unless you live directly next door to your office and daycare.
As far as your "Chicago guys are like this" and "too many women" complaints, these things are not relevant at all. It wouldn't be any easier for her in Indianapolis. And the female to male ratio is not as skewed as you are making it out to be. There is not a "huge gender imbalance". I don't know where you are getting this from.
Many people are raising kids in the city (myself included). It's not as difficult as you are making it out to be. Schools are the primary issue, and this is unlikely to change in the near future. You spend a lot of time complaining about parking, but there is an easy solution: Get a parking space. I know a LOT of parents living in the city, and they all have parking. It's almost a necessity with kids, unless you live directly next door to your office and daycare.
As far as your "Chicago guys are like this" and "too many women" complaints, these things are not relevant at all. It wouldn't be any easier for her in Indianapolis. And the female to male ratio is not as skewed as you are making it out to be. There is not a "huge gender imbalance". I don't know where you are getting this from.
Regarding the parking, YES, you have to "get a parking space", which is what I was trying to clarify to the OP. A deeded parking space can run you $30,000 - $40,000 plus annual property taxes. or, renting a spot can run you $300 a month. I know it is a little cheaper over in Wicker park, etc than Lakeview. I am trying to give an accurate picture of what life is like here in Chicago, in the areas of town that she is inquiring about. She will have to budget for that and she needs to know about that. And unless she is making close to $100,000 a year, it is going to be difficult to live in LP, LV, WP, etc and still have disposable income to enjoy living here. Which is why it would be good for her to clarify her income/career level.
When I moved here 11 years ago from Ohio, I was shocked, SHOCKED! to find out how expensive it is here and how amenities that we take for granted at apartment complexes in Ohio, are scarecely to be found here in the city...unless you are willing to PAY for it. She has a child, so she will need a 2 bedroom apartment at the minimum, with parking, and that will run her at least $2000 a month for a decent place with laundry, dishwasher etc...unless she is willing to live in a dumpy old vintage walk- up, with an air conditioner hanging out the window that barely keeps your place cool in the summer.
Regarding "men are like this etc", yes, they ARE relevant. The dating culture in places like Chi, NYC, SF, Seattle, are MUCH different than driving, car-oriented north american cities like Indy, Dayton, St Louis, etc. Entire websites have been built, describing the "Lincoln park lifestyle", trixies, chads, etc and this is something she needs to know about too. Because of the proximity factor and walkability, it is MUCh easier for men to meet women here, compared to cities like, Dayton, or Indy, where you have to DRIVE everywhere, and you are isolated. In those cities, the women are harder to find, and they bank off of this. here in the city, the tables are turned and men have a more even hand - which will not work in her fasvor. Sure, she could met the man of her dreams here, I am an optimist and I am not trying to talk her out of it, but I am trying to be blunt with her about the way the dating lifestyle works in this city. And yes, there is a gender imbalance here, I havent seen the latest statistic but I think the mix is like 53% women 47% men (at least, here in the city - dont know about the burbs), and yes a certain % of those males are gay.
...how amenities that we take for granted at apartment complexes in Ohio, are scarecely to be found here in the city...unless you are willing to PAY for it. She has a child, so she will need a 2 bedroom apartment at the minimum, with parking, and that will run her at least $2000 a month for a decent place with laundry, dishwasher etc...?
Are you kidding? There is a difference between necessities and wants. A huge majority of people live in Chicago and many other places around the country without all of the wants (amenities.)
This just goes to show how lazy and spoiled people are that they consider an in-unit washer,dryer, and dishwasher necessities. These things can help greatly when you are living in a household of 4 people or more. But I will be damned if I would waste $1000 a month just to have in-unit washer,dryer, and dishwasher for a two person household.
I know plenty of places with decent schools where two bedrooms are easily under $1000 and one does not have to pay for parking space. Sure many of the places do not have an in-unit washer,dryer,and dishwasher. But what is so hard about walking into a basement to do laundry? People are incapable of hand washing dishes now?
Are you kidding? There is a difference between necessities and wants. A huge majority of people live in Chicago and many other places around the country without all of the wants (amenities.)
This just goes to show how lazy and spoiled people are that they consider an in-unit washer,dryer, and dishwasher necessities. These things can help greatly when you are living in a household of 4 people or more. But I will be damned if I would waste $1000 a month just to have in-unit washer,dryer, and dishwasher for a two person household.
I know plenty of places with decent schools where two bedrooms are easily under $1000 and one does not have to pay for parking space. Sure many of the places do not have an in-unit washer,dryer,and dishwasher. But what is so hard about walking into a basement to do laundry? People are incapable of hand washing dishes now?
Give me a break.
Agree. You can find suitable 2BR places , in good neighborhoods, for well under $2000.
A dishwasher for a 2-person household ( one being a child) ? Washing 4-5 dishes a night is too much of a chore, or walking down to the basment to use a coin-operated washer is too inconvenient? Come on, now
Avenger, I agree with you about a dishwasher, and I don't think AC is a must either but when you have a kid having very, very easy access to a washer and dryer is very important. I have a W&D in-unit now and am dreading if I have to go back to living in a 3rd floor walk up and lugging the laundry down to the basement 2 or 3 times a week. It may be a bit easier with an 8 year old but I wouldn't doubt that if the OP has laundry now that she will gladly sacrifice it in her apartment search.
Are you kidding? There is a difference between necessities and wants. A huge majority of people live in Chicago and many other places around the country without all of the wants (amenities.)
This just goes to show how lazy and spoiled people are that they consider an in-unit washer,dryer, and dishwasher necessities. These things can help greatly when you are living in a household of 4 people or more. But I will be damned if I would waste $1000 a month just to have in-unit washer,dryer, and dishwasher for a two person household.
I know plenty of places with decent schools where two bedrooms are easily under $1000 and one does not have to pay for parking space. Sure many of the places do not have an in-unit washer,dryer,and dishwasher. But what is so hard about walking into a basement to do laundry? People are incapable of hand washing dishes now?
Give me a break.
Agreed. Plenty areas in Chicago still have decent schools and they aren't all glamorous and glitzy, but they are still great places to live and raise a school age child as well. I will agree that the dishwasher thing is a little extreme, although it was at the top of my list when moving. Next time I move, it will be on there again, lol.
Laundry: I cannot tell you how much more convenient it is to have a washer and dryer in the unit with you or near your place. (like the same flooor or something) It's more of a problem when you have just a few things to wash, and now you've got to spend 2 dollars or w/e just to wash it and dry it! I've been in that situation many times, and I am very happy not to have to deal with other side of the building and downstairs laundry rooms. I also hate laundromats. (I only like them when I am washing bedding)
The parking space is definitely something that needs to be considered. When Chicago gets cold (and it will very soon ) no one wants to be parked down the street, round the corner, in a garage or something. Many times I have slipped, fallen, etc. walking to said vehicle haha.
Now whether what I have mentioned is a necessity, hey, that's up to her to decide. Just help her with whatever decisions she needs to make
Hang loose
Quote:
Originally Posted by MassVt
Agree. You can find suitable 2BR places , in good neighborhoods, for well under $2000.
A dishwasher for a 2-person household ( one being a child) ? Washing 4-5 dishes a night is too much of a chore, or walking down to the basment to use a coin-operated washer is too inconvenient? Come on, now
Haha it is too much. Then again, I'm fat and lazy soo....lol
Avenger, I agree with you about a dishwasher, and I don't think AC is a must either but when you have a kid having very, very easy access to a washer and dryer is very important. I have a W&D in-unit now and am dreading if I have to go back to living in a 3rd floor walk up and lugging the laundry down to the basement 2 or 3 times a week. It may be a bit easier with an 8 year old but I wouldn't doubt that if the OP has laundry now that she will gladly sacrifice it in her apartment search.
I hear you. I am now part of a family of four (ahem) and do all of our laundry. Some condos in our building have in-unit washers/dryers, but ours doesn't. And we are on a high second floor. So yes, I lug multiple bags of laundry down an outdoor staircase in January to do laundry. It's not fun, but it's hardly the most difficult thing about my life. And there are hoardes of people in this city who go to the Lavanderia every week because they have no washers or dryers anywhere near their homes.
If we had already had kids when we bought this place, I would have had different criteria for our home search. But it's not like it's hard to find a place with in-unit W/D--especially since the huge condo glut has left many gut-rehabbed places for rent.
If I were to look for a place for a single mom in the city, I would have these criteria for my apartment:
1. A good neighborhood CPS school (just in case)
2. Two appropriately-sized bedrooms
3. A nearby parking space
4. An in-unit washer/dryer
5. Plenty of storage, including a locker for things like strollers, trikes, etc.
6. Room to play inside
7. Access to a yard, even if it's small
8. Proximity to a nice park with a nice playground
You are missing the point here. You are forgetting the fact that her reason for moving here is based on meeting a GUY and for a lifestyle upgrade.
Yes, there are many neighborhoods in this area that are somewhat affordable. No question about that.
But what the OP stated, is that she wants to live in an area where there are "street lights, people" etc. I know what she is referring to. She wants to live in the cool, hip, walkable area of chicago where there are people out and about on the sidewalks, walking to bars and coffee shops. Here is what she wants and needs:
1. Walkability/SINGLE GUYS walking around
2. Parking
3. Square footage/bedrooms or 2 people
4. SAFE NEIGHBORHOOD
5. GOOD schools
In order to get ALL of the factors above, she is going to have to pay a high price. She MIGHT be able to get a place in Logan Square that meets all of that. But it is still probably not as safe as where she is coming from.
Bottom line - if she can only afford to live in the cheaper neighborhoods of Chicago - then she is not gaining anything. She is back to square one, except with a higher cost of living and having to deal with slightly colder weather and more traffic.
You are missing the point here. You are forgetting the fact that her reason for moving here is based on meeting a GUY and for a lifestyle upgrade.
Yes, there are many neighborhoods in this area that are somewhat affordable. No question about that.
But what the OP stated, is that she wants to live in an area where there are "street lights, people" etc. I know what she is referring to. She wants to live in the cool, hip, walkable area of chicago where there are people out and about on the sidewalks, walking to bars and coffee shops. Here is what she wants and needs:
1. Walkability/SINGLE GUYS walking around
2. Parking
3. Square footage/bedrooms or 2 people
4. SAFE NEIGHBORHOOD
5. GOOD schools
In order to get ALL of the factors above, she is going to have to pay a high price. She MIGHT be able to get a place in Logan Square that meets all of that. But it is still probably not as safe as where she is coming from.
Bottom line - if she can only afford to live in the cheaper neighborhoods of Chicago - then she is not gaining anything. She is back to square one, except with a higher cost of living and having to deal with slightly colder weather and more traffic.
True, which is why we gave realistic opinions on where we think she'd fit in.
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) no one wants to be parked down the street, round the corner, in a garage or something. Many times I have slipped, fallen, etc. walking to said vehicle haha. 
